6,000 Miles (Station 19)

Unconditionally

Carina's POV:

"Bambina, I'm sorry. I should've asked you before I said anything, I just went into fix-it mode, and..." I tried to apologize and explain.

Maya cut me off. "Yeah, you should have." Her tone was quick and hurt and angry and made me feel awful. She started pacing and I followed her into our bedroom.

"I know, I know I should have. It wasn't fair to just assume. I can figure out something else, Adelina doesn't have to stay here, I can get another apart..."

"Of course Adelina's staying here!" she interrupted again. There was a pause as I tried to figure out what to say next; she looked so mad, I wasn't expecting her to be on board so quickly. Seeing the confusion on my face, she continued. "Carina, I'm not mad about her staying here; she's your sister of course she's welcome here. I'm just pissed that you didn't talk to me. You did all this planning, all this 'fixing' and didn't even look at me, let alone discuss it with me." She stopped pacing and sat down on the bed.

"Im sorry," I said quietly, as I joined her on the bed. "Can we talk about it now?"

Maya nodded.

I started back at the beginning and started to explain everything Addie told me. She seemed to soften when she heard about everything with Sofia and my dad catching her and Adelina.

"When I called Papá, he was being.. ugh! He was just impossible. But he basically said that Adelina could figure it out and hung up."

"And then you decided that she was just going to stay here with us?" She asked, more of a statement then a question.

I nodded. "And I'm sorry, I shouldn't have assumed she would stay here."

"Of course she's going to stay with you. She's your sister. It just.... It puts me in a tough position."

"I'm sorry," I said again. "Like I said, we can get another place. I don't want to put this on you."

She shook her head, "no, I don't want you going anywhere. I just... I never saw myself being a mom, and I know I'm not her mom and she's mostly raised, but it's still bringing a kid into our lives, into our home."

My stomach sank when I heard her say she didn't want to be a mom, but I put that aside for the time being.

"You're right. I guess I just didn't think about that because I already feel like her mamá sometimes."

I explained that Adelina wasn't quite planned, I mean just look at the age gap. And just after she was born, my mamá moved to the US and took Andrea and Addie with her. Just 6 years later, mamá passed away and while Andrea was in school and old enough to stay, my baby sister was sent back to Italy. With Papá the way he is, and our mama gone, I kind of stepped into that maternal role, acting as both sister and mother. Maya was quiet as she took it all in. She knew some of it but hearing it all now, I could see her piecing it together and starting to understand.

"And when I left Italy," I continued, "I felt so guilty leaving her behind. But I needed to check on Andrea, and with my research, I just... I had to go."

Maya took my hand, "babe, you have nothing to feel guilty about; you did nothing wrong."

I shrugged. "Either way, I've always felt like I should've been there to protect her."

"So you need to protect her now," Maya responded.

I nodded and let out a sigh.

"Okay," Maya went on. "Then we'll figure it out."

Adelina's POV:

I ran for 45 minutes or so trying to clear my head. Carina put a smile on for me, but I could tell her conversation with Papá hadn't gone well. The way she said that I was staying with her for a while confirmed that I couldn't go home. My thoughts started to spiral a little, going over all the things I'd have to do to stay here, all the things I would be leaving behind, the fact that I'm here with no end date, no idea how long it'll be before I can see my friends, see Sofia, and feeling like such a burden to my sister. The deeper my spiral got, the harder I dug into the concrete under my feet. I ran until most of the fear faded, until I wasn't thinking about anything but my breath.

When I got back to the apartment, I could hear Maya and Carina talking. As soon as I closed the door, they took their conversation to hushed tones; I knew they were talking about me. I sighed as the thoughts started to come back. Making my way into the kitchen I poured myself a glass of water and sat at the counter a moment to catch my breath and my thoughts. My head was rested in my hands when I felt a hand on my back. I was so deep in my thoughts I hadn't heard Carina walk in.

Lifting my head up, I could tell she looked exhausted. After everything with Andrea, I felt bad adding something else to her plate.

"I'm sorry about this," I started to apologize, but my sister cut me off.

"You have nothing to be sorry about. You are always welcome and wanted anywhere I am."

I nodded unconvinced. I hated feeling like a burden.

"Don't worry, Bambina. We'll figure it all out." She said gently, pulling me into a hug and ignoring how sweaty I was. "Everything's going to be okay."