Doubt and Trust

The Act of Living

Hey hey hey my little nerds sorry for not updating in a while. I've been rather busy. Anyway sorry for the wait. Well here you go...👓
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I see white everywhere as my eyes slowly open. I hear beeps coming from next to me. I'm guessing I'm in a hospital from looking at my surroundings. Then I hear it. Crying, more like fucking banshee screeches from the other room. I guess that'd be my sister.

I slowly sit up in the hospital bed and look at my surroundings more in detail. Basically all I see is white. White ceilings, white floor, white bed covers. Ugh what's up with all this god damn white.

I turn my head and look for that button to call the nurse, but just as my hand starts to extend to push it someone rushes in. Someone extends their arms and envelopes me in a hug. It takes me by surprise at first but I soon get use to it. I look up to see my sister.

I smile at her and pat her on the back. She just hugs me even tighter. She's crying but I can see beneath those tears there's a smile. A smile that is truly genuine and grateful.

"Eli.... I thought I lost you." Lizzy says to me. (Basically to you guys that means the sisters name is Lizzy, or Elizabeth. Which ever) Then she starts to tear up again.

"I'm sorry...." I sign to her. I bring my hand up and wipe her tears from her eyes. By then a doctor has come in seeing as though I'm finally awake. He's standing in the doorway looking on at the scene. I look up at him and he walks in further.

"If you don't mind Eli, I'd like to ask you a few questions." He says making it sound more like a statement rather than a question. I nod in agreement to it anyway. He then continues on. "I would like to ask whether or not your mom has abused you in anyway, shape, or form? And if so how long?" I look over at my sister and she nods indicating me to answer.

I just stare at him emotionless. I know they want my mom to be put in jail. Not that I don't either but still. I just look on without emotion. They ask me over and over again. All I do is stare. I don't know why I'm not answering, she's beaten me for years. I just don't know why I'm not saying so. After a while they just give up. I'm thankful for that.

When the visiting hours are over and everyone goes home, I'm there staring into nothingness. For hours I sit there and wonder why I'm still there. Sitting there and wondering. I guess it's my stupid consciences fault. I have to go on living still.....great. Soon enough I'm falling asleep. The last thought before I'm swept off into dream land is.... Is this the act of living? If it is then let it be my last act.