marvel and camilo madrigal oneshots, headcanons, and imagines

list of love [matt murdock x insecure!gn!reader oneshot]

summary: y/n had been treated poorly and while feeling low, they muttered a long list of things they hated about themself. matt heard all of it and knew he had to do something about y/n's self-confidence issues. 

warnings: like all my other fics, kisses, very passionate ones! there will be profanity and ⚠️⚠️sexual assault (i think) against y/n⚠️⚠️. mentions of hating yourself and someone insulting your weight and looks. because this is gn reader, they/them pronouns will be used. I also picture this with a chubby reader but you can envision it otherwise. y/n works and nelson and Murdock as Karen's job but Karen is still there. 

category: fluff with angst at the start

a/n: y/n knows about matt's nightly thing and also I am so mad they took the marvel shows off Netflix! I hadn't finished dd yet (i started before nwh) and I am so pissed. this story doesn't matter with the dd storyline as it doesn't mention the events of the show. this is from the prompt list used in earlier chapters and I think I'm going to change y/n's pov to first-person and I think I'm gonna start using capitalization from now on bc Grammarly is annoying me 😭

[Y/N's POV, first person]

Today was actual crap. Out of all the ways my day could have gone, this was the last way I wanted it to. First, I woke up almost an hour late for work, giving me less than 15 minutes to get ready as opposed to my usual hour and a half routine. I barely chewed my breakfast before heading out. That was when I realized my car had run out of gas, meaning I had to go fill it up or walk to work in the -20°C (-4°F) weather. I wasn't in the mood for the cold, so I went with the former. 

I sped, with the little fuel I had left, to the nearest gas station. When the tank was full, I thought to myself, Well, I'm already 30 minutes late. Why not get a snack from the bodega right there?

I gave into my thoughts and made my way to the shop. I picked a nice, small bag of my favourite chips and right when I was about to make my way out, some man I didn't know came up to me and said, "Hey, what's a pretty gal/girl/person like you doing here, all by yourself? You need someone like me to accompany you, babe." 

He emphasized the last word, "babe" and that made me very uncomfortable. Like what is this man, who I don't know, trying to do here? I tried to express my uninterest and I muttered coldly, "Oh, I'm alright, I can walk to my car by myself, thanks for asking." 

The man proceeded to look me up and down and walk slowly towards me saying, "How about we take this somewhere else, just the two of us." He wrapped his arms around my waist while I tried to squirm out. The man gloated in my discomfort and I looked around to see if anyone was seeing this. I took one last glance before I shoved him off of me.

"Don't touch me! Don't even try to put your hands on me again, bitch!" I threatened furiously, getting in the self-defence stance Matt taught me last week. 

"You're too fat/skinny for me anyways. I like my partner without so much meat on their bones/some meat on their bones, ugly ass bitch! Look at yourself in the mirror before you complain about someone giving you attention, fucker," he spat. 

Oh no he didn't, that bitch really didn't, I said in my head. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of hurting my feeling even though those words cut deep. I had already been struggling with insecurities and his comments didn't make it any better. 

I threw a punch at his jaw, then his nose, kicked him in the stomach, then one last kick where the sun doesn't shine, just like Matt taught me to and he doubled over in pain, squirming on the floor. But, before I went too far and got myself in trouble I didn't need to be in, I ran off, sprinting to my car and driving off, hoping and praying no one saw that, even though I knew Matt heard all of it. 

I decided not to go to work and call a sick day or something, even if I knew Matt knew the truth. I spent the rest of the day glossing over and reflecting on that encounter and before I knew it, it was 6 PM and tears were rolling down my face. The tears turned to sobs and the sobs then turned into words. The words were a list of all the things I hate about myself. I don't know why I was saying them but the hateful remarks about myself just kept pouring out. 

"I hate (your insecurity). I hate how (your insecurity). I hate (list your insecurities) and (more insecurities). Why can't I look like someone else? Like the models in the magazines? Like the people I work with?!" I wept. 

I heard the door open and I started to freak out until I heard someone calling my name. I could recognize that voice anywhere. Matt. I had honestly forgotten Matt could hear me. Matt, the man I've been infatuated with since I met him at law school and that I have to see every day at work. Matt, the man I would stitch up when Claire wasn't there after his fights as Daredevil.  He saw me as just a friend when I was practically in love with him. He took off his glasses and put down his stick. 

"Y/N...I'm sorry I didn't get there earlier. I heard what had happened and I-I tried to get there but by the time I did, both of you were gone," he practically whispered. He sounded more worried than he normally did, a tremor in his voice. I didn't say anything in response, I just sat there with my head towards the ground and I nodded so he knew I wasn't angry. 

"Y/N, I," he sighed, "why do you hate yourself so much? Even with the fire in my eyes, I know you're beautiful, Y/N. I know it, no matter what you say," He sat down on the couch I was seated on and waited for a response from me. When he got nothing, he continued. 

"I love your laugh and how it rivals all my favourite records. I love that one noise you always make when you're frustrated. This is gonna sound weird, but I love how you smell," we both chuckled lightly. "I love how understanding you are and how you never hesitate to help me after my....nightly activities. I love how funny you are and how you somehow manage to make me laugh when I'm bleeding out on your couch. I love how you can't take anything seriously but also take things too seriously. I love everything about you, Y/N. I," he paused for a moment, trying to find the right words. I took note of how his beautiful brown eyes shone in the light seeping from my window. 

"Y/N, I love you," he turned to me with a slight nervousness in his eyes. 

I was bumfuzzled. That was not what I expected to hear, but I wasn't complaining whatsoever. I turned back to look at him with tears, happy tears, in my eyes. 

"I love you too, Matt. More than you could ever imagine" I choked out. I saw the relief on his face and noticed his gaze lower from my eyes to my lips. At that moment, I wondered what I looked like to him, with his "World of Fire" and all. He looked back at my eyes, silently asking for my permission. I nodded and we both leaned in. 

This is the most cliche thing I'll ever say, but it felt like there were sparks around us. His lips were soft and danced in sync with my own. Our eyes were both closed in delight as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I brought my arms to rest on his shoulders and we broke apart briefly for air, leaning back in quickly. 

The kiss became passionate quickly, rougher than the first one. My hand went up to his hair, very lightly tugging on it and he pulled me impossibly closer. There was so much love shared between us. His fingers drew little circles and shapes on my thigh as I straddled him. I moved my hands down to his cheeks and we kissed passionately. Slowly and painfully, we broke apart once more and Matt whispered in my ear, "I love you so much, sweetheart. More than you could ever imagine."

"Hey, you stole my line!" I accused him lightheartedly, laughing and lightly hitting his chest. He brought his lips on mine briefly and sweetly and started giving me kisses on both my cheeks.

"I can't believe I finally get to call you my sweetheart."

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