Poison [[Eren x Reader]]

Chapter 44

My lips roll in as my body tenses up, feeling my heart drop while my stomach completely capsizes inside of itself. I can't stop myself from digging my teeth into my bottom lip, chewing on the soft skin as Eren stares at me with his lips tightly sewn together, eyes sunken in with his back pressed up against the wall of the jacuzzi.

I'm unable to break away from his somber gaze as the silence stays louder than the music in the background. "Armin's really leaving..." I let the words inaudibly slip out past my lips. I sink deeper into myself, letting the warm water engulf my body as I process everything that's happening. Eren's losing everybody.

Eren stays silent for a few moments, sniffling slightly from his nose and I'm unable to determine if it's from the change of body temperature or from the tears he's holding back. "He didn't wanna tell anyone because he didn't want anyone to worry," Eren mumbles while holding back a frown, eyes glancing between my irises and the bubbles pooling around my hands.

Armin's usually the smart one of the group, but this is the stupidest fucking shit he's ever done. I shift my weight to my feet, pressing them into the ground before standing up, letting the cool air brush against my body as my skin adjusts to the temperature. "C'mon," I mumble while stepping out of the jacuzzi, walking onto the wet concrete and rocks below me, feeling goosebumps appear on my skin as I shiver, "let's go inside, Eren."

He mumbles some sort of response, but I'm too focused on walking over to the chair with clean, folded towels resting on it, making sure that I don't trip over myself since I'm still pretty fucking drunk. I can hear the sound of water splashing as he stands up, getting out of the hot tub while I grab one of the towels in the stack, quickly unfolding it to dry myself off. Eren's footsteps are soft against the concrete as he walks over to me, grabbing a towel as I drape it over my shoulders.

This feels repetitive. The fact that this relationship never has a moment of peace because of so many obstacles in our way, but I wonder if that's just representing how much we love each other. We've still decided to stay with each other no matter what, but sometimes, as my eyes look over at him while he dries himself off, I wish that we were able to have a normal relationship. To live together and not have to worry about anything. Even though I hate myself for thinking this, I've thought about the idea of us having kids and spending the rest of our lives together, or maybe even us moving far away from everyone and living discreetly.

I don't reach for his hand once I start walking across the backyard, hoping that no one's paying attention to us or Eren's gloomy expression evidently plastered across his face. As I look down at the concrete, I notice the wet imprints of my feet as I walk along the ground. My eyes divert toward the sliding glass doors as I approach them, letting my fingers grasp the handle to slide the door open, just enough for me to walk through.

The door shuts behind me once Eren steps into the living room, and I'm just hoping that Jean's mom doesn't get mad at us for leaving a small trail of water on the carpet. I plop down onto one of the couches, reminiscing on the past parties that we've attended in this very same living room, and watching Eren walk over to me.

My vision is slightly blurry as the alcohol is still prominent in my body, trying to make out Eren's sharp features he sits down next to me, bundled up in his towel. "Eren, I'm really, really sorry," I say before pressing my lips together, slightly gritting my teeth to fidget as he sits silently, "It's just we're all growing up and moving on with our lives. Armin's been telling us about this since September and now it's May, he's really excited about this."

"I know..." Eren says while extending his arm over to my lap, cupping my hand in his palms as it rests on my thigh, "I just never thought that it'd be so soon, y'know? Of course, I'm happy for him." His voice is slightly shaky, probably still trying to steady his words, making sure that he doesn't slur them as the alcohol struggles to take control.