Fragments of A Broken Heart (Completed)

I. Dad's Graveyard

As the day went by, Lusiana would not stop thinking about how painful what had been happened to his father in his last time. And now, time passed. All alone, no parents, no friends in this disaster era, no boyfriend.

She sat on a lonely chair just outside of the graveyard. It was almost dusk, and there were fireflies as if it was her dad, trying to say goodbye to her. Ugh, could it be sadder? Yet, she thought she did not want to leave because she missed his funeral and this lonely time was the most ethereal experience for her, reflecting on her last time with her father.

Finally, after two hours of longing for her last time with him, her phone was buzzing. It was Abimanyu. Nothing special, only his childhood friend since junior high. Yet, Abimanyu, or Bima, really had helped her in this catastrophe time. So, it was natural for her to answer his call when he asked a company to grab a meal. It was normal even though they had never done that before.

But Lusiana could not stop thinking how odd or how it would never be weird for them at the same time. One time, Bima was only her schoolmate. Next time, he brought someone else to their friendship, Aulia. And long after that, Lusiana finally knew of a secret relationship between them. Well, he could tell her, it was easy to tell your best friend that you date someone, right?

The funny thing was, Lusiana knew about them after they broke up, so when the duos became the trios, soon she had never been on a regular lunch date with Bima except Aulia was there. A group or a third wheel? She never really thought of it. First, because it would be hurtful for her to think about them, and it only made her mad. Hence it would make them feel uneasy. Second, Lusiana always thinks they are her only friend.

For sure, they gave her a birthday cake. They were there every time she had a problem with her family, with a boy, or just for hanging out. Until one day, Aulia left their WhatsApp group. The reason was something she would never understand in the first place. Lusiana only knew it was about their "old" memories and about the promise they made to each other. It was about if the trios would collapse, they would never break a friendship with Lusiana. Even so, their oath to each other had only made Lusiana feel like she was a third-wheel.

But that evening, Bima's chat wasn't the only notification her phone received.

There were other notifications she received that arrived when she opened her phone. After she closed the Bima chatroom, there was another chat from Bimasena.

Yes, there was more than one Bima in her life.

And the latest Bima was someone she would never have thought to greet her again.

He was Bimasena or the older Bima. He came after she swiped right when she used a dating app. And she would never think that what was a virtual figure that she had known formerly by all those chats he had sent to her has yet become a person, but the more they chat, the more their feelings grew to each other.

Bimasena was someone she would never expect to meet. He was a kind-hearted and decent man. She liked him because of his clever jokes and oddly-interesting conversation. Those were fun, full of enthusiasm, and would always give another knowledge for Lusiana.

If only Bimasena were asvivid as Abimanyu.

***

Dear, you,

I don't know how or why

But you chose this very morningtide

To discuss what bothers thou.

It is my vulnerability.

"Don't be skeptical," you replied

Because I told you my tardiest morose feeling

Oh, if only it's been relaxed

But it is hard, you see?

To feel like you have a fate

And you kept talking about it

Which has made me feel like shredded

Then I was exposed, and you saw my stripped skin.

And you saw my clandestine wounds

Underneath the heart that once has torn

Because I put my hope to the souls

And you said souls were just puppets with their minds.

I thought you would leave

But you were there

Standing so determined

Waiting for me slowly get remedied

You kept telling me to believe in myself

To never surrender

You were the only one who waited for me

To break the transparent wall that I embedded in any connections.