Midnight Dreams

Memories

When the murder of Lily and James Potter were discovered, Aurors rushed to their prime suspect, Sirius Black.

They broke into the home of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin in the dark of the night, the moon still high up in the sky, a sliver of light shinning on their home.

As Aurors came and dragged Sirius out of their home, Remus stood on the side, five Aurors having to hold him back from running towards Sirius.

His voice breaking as he screamed for his Sirius to be return to him, his voice growing louder and harsher as they kept blocking him from the love of his life.

People saw and heard it.

The screams of a lover losing the one person he had left.

The screams of a lover losing his everything.

The sounds of tears and wailing was heard through the night as the infamous Sirius Black was dragged away to be punished for his crime.

His destination would be Azkaban, no way in without guidance and definitely no way out.

Remus struggled against the arms held in front of him, they were preventing him from running towards Sirius, they had refused him a goodbye.

With one last glance back towards Remus, Sirius mouthed him an "I Love you" and with that, he was taken away.

Remus broke down, tears falling down his face as he saw him leave.

A couple of days later, Remus visited Sirius in Azkaban with the approval of the ministry of magic, to give each other a chance to say goodbye.

Sirius looked up at the darkness in front of him, adjusting his eyes to the first non guard he has seen in days. As soon as his eyes laid eyes on the person in front of him, his tired eyes brightened and he stood to attention.

But the sight in front of him was the last thing he had expected.

A bright eyed Remus Lupin stood in front of him, yes, that was true, but his demeanor had changed.

His eyes grew darker with time, yet it had only been a few days, his stance was condescending, and his smile- his smile was evil.

The thought of a smile like that on Remus was out of the ordinary for Sirius. He had known Remus since their first year and had never seen him like that.

"Moony? My love?" Sirius asked softly.

"Yes my dear Sirius?" An unfamiliar voice answered, wearing the face of Remus.

"Who are you?"
"Why I'm Remus of course. Your lover."
"No. You're not!" Sirius shouted, ticked off at his blatant attempt to lie to him.

Remus laughed as if mocking Sirius's feelings of worry and fear for him.

"You know. It was so easy to trick you." Remus suddenly told him.

Sirius's eyes widened. "What the bloody h*ll are you talking about." He said sharply.

Remus gave him a look as he smirked, lifting the sleeve on his jumper.

The dark mark in the shape of a snake glowed in the darkness surrounding Sirius.

"What have you done?" He asked as he looked towards Remus.

"What you should've done if you weren't such a coward." Remus answered back, scoffing.

"You don't know what you've done."
"Oh, but I do."
"You don't know what they'll make you do-."
"Like what?" Remus asked, chuckling. "Like, say, k*lling a blood traitor and a muggle?"

Sirius locked eyes with Remus, a worried and suspecting look crossing his face.

"Say you didn't." Sirius tried to calmly ask before his voice betrayed him and he barely spoke the words out.

"No matter." Remus said smiling. "They're dead and your here. Everything ended happily. Besides. I'm not stupid enough to confess to that."

"Moony." Sirius said his nickname softly.

Remus look on coldly, the affection he had once shared for Sirius was now gone and was replaced with an indifferent glance his way.

"I love you please." Sirius told him, trying to pull him to his senses.

Remus leaned towards Sirius's cell.

"It's too little, too late." He said as he pulled back and walked away.

Sirius callled after him.
It couldn't be true.
It wasn't true.

This wasn't Remus.
This just wasn't him, Sirius tried to convince himself.

The man he had loved was now someone else, yet he didn't know when that happened.

Was it when they first met on the train when they were 11?
Was it when they began close friends throughout their years?
Was it when he confessed to him while tending to his injuries after a full moon?
Was it when they kissed in the field of grass with snow falling around them?
Was it when they said their I love you's in their sixth year?
Was it when they fought together in the war with Lily and James by their side?
Or was it before then?

These thoughts would haunt Sirius's memories to the last stretch of his life.

He would hold onto the hope that his Remus would return.

He held onto hope as he stayed in the Azkaban cell, for the rest of his life, living in the constant nightmare that the love of his life k*lled his friends, that the love of his life had lied to him.

If Remus had gone through so much just to lie to him, was everything else a lie?

Was their friendship a lie?
Was their love a lie?

The questions will continue to haunt Sirius for as long as he lived, living in the cell that would become his cage for nightmares until he died.

Even with all the facts laid out in front of him, Sirius refused to acknowledge it.

For if he did, that would mean he had lived his life on a love filled with lies that he didn't know where it started and where it ended.

So instead, he would hold onto the last happy and good memories he had of Remus and him.

Memories where they were happy.
Memories where they were smiling.
Memories where they were honest.
Memories that weren't lies.