Change- Camilo Madrigal {angst}

Lunch

Guess what? I quit having a plot 2 chapters ago and I'm going to just write out random crap. Also, trigger warning, this one's going to include a bit of swearing. Not mild swearing, but some strong(is that a thing?) swearing. So like 2 swear words.

No one spoke a word. 

Dead silence.

Don't think about it, Don't think about it, Don't think about it

It was a twisted, sad version of 'We Don't Talk about Bruno'. But, as much as he wanted to shut that part of his brain off and throw it away, he couldn't help feeling betrayed by Dolores. He was hoping at least she would stand up for him, or give him the tiniest bit of support. He couldn't look at her.

He knew he was inching backward, he knew he looked terrified, he knew that the tears were welling up, he knew he needed to blink before he could leave, he knew he had to stop.

Naturally, the living house ignored the fact that Camilo was shuffling backward, Casita pushed a tile up, talking to Mirabel in its very own way.

As Camilo had understood it, Mirabel and Casita had made their own secret language after her failed gift ceremony, as a way to distract Mirabel, requested by Julieta. Of course, at the time, Camilo's aunt had absolutely no clue how Mirabel would hold it over their heads for 10 years, but that was beside the point.

Mirabel had been whispering back, and Camilo couldn't tell what she was whispering. He would have looked at Dolores to gauge if she understood it, but Don't think about it was sweeping through his head, blowing over all rational thoughts

Oblivious to the tile dance Casita was doing on the other side of the table, Isabela stood up.

"You know what this reminds me of?" she asked, and Camilo was absolutely terrified. Despite her honey-sweet voice, she had an ice-cold glare, and it was directed at multiple people at once.

"My only motivation to pretend to be the perfect girl you wanted. The perfect girl the entire goddamn Encanto wanted me to be. And you know what's worse" Isabela stood up, making her way to Camilo.

"You reacted better in my head than you are now" She grabbed his arm, giving him a small smile, before turning back to the expressionless faces of the rest of the family.

"I don't think you understand what you're doing, so let me educate you. Not only are you ignoring Camilo, but you're also inadvertently pressing more pressure on everyone else because no one knows how to stop this cycle, do they?"

"Isabela" Bruno was standing now too "Isa, I told you that was my job"

"With all due respect, I honestly don't give a shit. I get that you're trying to save us all the trouble, but I don't think it's going to work. Because why stop with it when there's someone to take it all out on?" Isabela replied

Bruno looked speechless, but before Isa could continue, Mirabel stood up too.

"It doesn't even stop there. You're putting the perfect image weight on all of us again, shunning anyone who doesn't fit with it"

Julieta stood up, smashing her fist on the table.

"You guys don't even think how it's going to influence Camilo. He is a child people." She was crying now

"Do you want to know something? Me and him had an amazing time laughing and making jokes and being exactly what we should be. Do you think having a good public image is going to make him happier than that? Because I see no way you could." Bruno lifted out an arm to catch Julieta, who was starting to lean to one side, but she stopped him

"Today I saw something I hadn't seen in anyone's eyes in this crappy place. I saw happiness. And you know what? It was better than anything the townsfolk could give us. Hell, it's better than this entire place altogether."

"I would gladly give up my gift a hundred times over just to keep that look in his eyes."

Dolores pushed her chair back, silently walking toward Camilo. Her eyes showed an emotion Camilo didn't usually see; a suprised sort of scared look.

And yet...

There was newfound steel in them, too. As if him getting hurt by her lack of action was the last straw.

Antonio stood up too. He was clinging to Camilo's leg. Antonio must have noticed Camilo's happy tears because he asked why Camilo was sad.

Camilo bent down, giving his little brother a hug. It didn't feel right, it didn't feel perfect, It didn't even feel real.

Camilo felt like he was floating. His brain was stuffed with cotton candy, and he was laughing into his brother's hair, and he probably looked like an idiot, but Camilo couldn't bring himself to care.

Because at that moment, for the first time in a long time, Camilo couldn't feel his brain moving forward, trying to understand things, trying to get something new. For the first time in a long time, Camilo wasn't striving for more. He was perfectly content sitting in that very moment, to the point where it felt unreal.

And so when he finally separated from his very confused little brother, he realized everyone had stood up and was on his side of the table.

Everyone but Abuela herself.

Camilo could see the problem now. Everything made sense, and the depressing truth settled over him like a tarp. But along with the discovery came an interesting swarm of anger.

And it brought him back to after his cousin's gift ceremony, when he was sure what he was supposed to do with his gift, and promised himself that no one would ever have to cry; Not if he could help it.

He realized that Bruno was the scapegoat for a long time. Longer than he could imagine. 

And so he stood up and walked over to his grandmother. She seemed older now as if the fight had aged her up by years and years.

And once he reached her?

He knelt in front of her, grabbing her hands, and told her the one thing he knew everyone in the family had been fantasizing about saying, someway or another.

He told her that things needed to change.

Okay, dam.

A whopping 978 words. That's a new record, I think.

I think I'm basically done with the story now.

there's not much more to do? i don't know anymore. 

I'll figure something out? I guess?

We'll see?