Between Never and Maybe

8

"Funny how often life seems to work in reverse. We were children masquerading as adults and now we are adults acting like children."-Alice Feeney, His & Hers

"That seems to be a very deep problem." Nasamid ako sa kape na iniinom ko nang biglang may nagsalita sa gilid ko. I froze as the very familiar Tyler Janssen van Howell occupied the vacant seat next to me. I feigned disinterest as I attempted for another sip on the coffee, I am saving up dahil wala na akong pera pambili ng panibago. And his presence doesn't help on lifting myself on the sea of thoughts running on my head.

"What are you doing here?" as much as I wanted to tell him to leave me alone, it wouldn't be of much significance if I give another round of sarcasm. After all, no one even knows us here. Or maybe just me, damn I don't know anymore. Sumimsim ulit ako sa kape.

"Just got out of a party, it was super lit I'm telling you! There were lots of booze, food and―" He cut himself mid-sentence, like he just said something wrong. Lumingon ako sa kanya to find him flustered. His ears were a light shade of pink and his eyes were focused on his hands, like they were the most fascinating thing on earth. I raised my brow at his sudden change of demeanor.

"Why?" I asked. He lifted his gaze up and scratched his head like he just found himself in a silly situation.

"I thought you might not want to hear about it, after all you seem to really hate my guts." He smiled sheepishly and I did everything I could not to scoff or make a sarcastic remark. So, he did know huh.

"What was the party like?" I could feel his breath get hitched at the question and I kind of wanted to take it back. That almost made me too friendly as heck and I don't want this jerk to get any further ideas.

Men have a thing for always interpreting things according to their liking. Not that I am saying it is only for the men. It goes both ways for all genders, but the art of persuasion seemed to circulate in a different way for the male population. Gaya nga ng sabi ni Megara sa Hercules...

No means yes and Get lost means take me, I'm yours.

But I wanted to get rid of my worries, or sweep it under the rug. Bukas ko na lang iisipin, o kaya sa susunod na araw.

I wanted to be a normal, naïve girl for a while. I wanted to be vulnerable for once, in front of this guy who would someday be my life's biggest regret.

"Go ahead, tell me."

Alas-dos pasado na rin nang maubos ang huli sa kape ko, naubos na yung kaninang binili ko. Ending binilhan pa niya ako ng isa, getting one for himself as well. To sober up siguro, kung di pa man nawala ang pagkalasing niya sa haba ng pinagkukwento niya sa akin. He went into every detail, like he was some sort of kid telling his mom about his first day at school. And I listened for the entire time, nodding if I have to and laughing when I found something funny.

"Uy nga pala wala ka bang klase bukas? Este mamaya." He asked as he looked at his watch, probably realizing just how long he blabbered like I was his damn best friend of some sort. This is my cue to leave, lalo na't may klase pa haynako. Sana di ako pagalitan ni inang.