Little Euphoria - JJK Fiction

chapter 19

Y/N's P.O.V.

"Good morning, my sweetheart." My lips tug up at her thrilled voice. And eventhough I have been getting gitters since morning due to the building apprehension, I could not help to feel the blossoming hope in my chest. 

It's been two weeks since eonni decided to help me with my vocal therapy.  Uncertainity gripped me the moment I sat down for my first session. For all I thought, we would go for vocal excercise. Instead, ennoie retorted for discussing about my past for the first week. My fingers tingle and throat parch dry when I recall how ardous the first few days were. Despite my panic attacks, and my denial to express wholy what I have been through, eonnie was and is patient with me. At some point, we had to take break for I couldn't pause the tremors that seized my body.

Before conforting my relationship with mom and dad, I believed I was alright., that - past, those words, those fights, those taunts and those comparison didn't affect me. Untill I realised I had them stacked up in a corner, afraid of them overpowering me. And when eonnie stirred the water discussing my bond with my parents, they pushed past the fragile barriers my heart had put up.

Deep breath, Y/N. 4  inhale, 5 hold, 7 exhale.

I steer my attention towards Taehee eonnie, and greet her back with a small smile of mine. With another week of vocal excercises which although less strenous then those talking sessions, strained me enough to embrace my blanket the I moment I would finish up the house work. The reason, I am lagging behind in my assignments. 

"So, are you excited?" I give her a series of nod. She's a good therapist, and I have no doubt that whoever will be her patient will leave from her therapies as a free and happy soul. She's calm, understanding, and gentle with her words and actions.

"You have been doing great, you know." A shy smile reaches my lips at that. She has been nothing but an absolute angel to me.

"I am proud of you, sweetheart. We have come so far, haven't we?" Agree. My heart swells with delight every time she appreciates my efforts. Every time she acknowledges me, my expressions, the hidden meaning behind my querries and worries. She's like the freshness of spring. I have felt winter my whole life. I never knew humans could experience spirng too. But with her and Jungkook, everything feels brighter than before. Now, whenever mom points out my flaw, I recall the goodness that's in me. Her words hurt, for she's my mother, however I do not dwell deep into the hurt.

Nobody is too good, we all are just good enough.

If not entirely, then partially I have accepted myself. I feel more optimistic than I have ever felt.

"Is everything fine between your parents?" I raise my thumb up. Strangely, mom and dad have been civil with each other. Or maybe I am too exhausted to notice anything once I am inbetween my covers. I am grateful for the peace though. My exams are approaching, this silence lets me learn things with ease in my mind and heart.

"And what about Jungkook? Did you get to talk to him?" My cheeks turn red at her mischievious grin.

"We talked for a bit during the break. Do you know he wants to be artist too. He will be a remarkable artist." I write down in my notepad. Another thing she added in my life.

"I haven't seen his art, but heard a lot of his praises from grandmother. Wait- does that mean you both could go to same university?" My smile fell at her question, and she notices. Her eyes quietly observe me for minutes, her left hand coming to embrace mine.

"I do not know if mom would let me pursue arts. She despise whenever I draw." I gulp down the growing emotions in my chest, weighing my heart down.

"Hey, we can atleast try. Or else, you can continue it while you are away in university."  That's the only hope I have in my heart. Even if they do not agree to send me to another city, I could try to apply for dorms.