Thicker Than Ink

Sixty Six

...

Adrian

...

I don't remember actually falling asleep after Daddy and I went to bed... But as my eyes creep open and spot daylight sneaking in through the curtains I know that apparently... I did sleep...

I just hope Daddy got some rest too... We both really needed it.

It's not long after I rub the sleep from at least one of my eyes that even if Daddy didn't fall asleep when I did, because I don't remember falling asleep in the first place, he's at least sleeping now... Even if his mind still seems almost as turbulent as when we were awake last night...

I can't tell if maybe it's actually nightmares or if maybe his head just can't stop replaying the bad day we had... The images I'm finding when I let my mind lean into his not making any real sense because everything is muddled and blending together... And I don't know if I should wake him up so he can trade one batch of anxiety for the one I know he'll still be carrying when he wakes up... Or if I should let him ride out the whirling emotions his sleepy mind is trying to make sense of...

Before I can make any decision though, the muddled images in Silas's mind start to dissolve, and the next thing I know my sweet Daddy is slowly opening his eyes... Blinking at me in confusion... Because like me... From what I can gather, he doesn't remember actually falling asleep either...

...

Silas

...

"You okay, Princess?" It's not often that my Addy-Baby wakes up before me... But until yesterday I don't think I would have assumed something was wrong right away...

Yet here I am full of worry, hoping that he and our child are okay... That he's not in pain or struggling with his anxiety until he responds with a sweet and loving, "I'm okay, Daddy, I was just making sure that you fell asleep last night too. We both really needed the rest."

The smile he gives me melts my insides down into a warm pool of comfort, and I find myself pulling my sweet Princess Bean closer for a tighter cuddle... Hoping that maybe it'll brace us both for having to actually get up and start the day... One where Addy will be by my side and within sight at all times to ensure his safety...

It's one thing to know that there is a possible poacher in our territory... One both brave and stupid enough to shoot at a timberwolf... But it's an entirely different ball game knowing that there is a possible poacher here... While my mate is pregnant with our baby...

Things seem so much more intense... And the urge to create and keep a safe, calm environment for my sweet mate while his body grows our child deep inside of him... It feels impossible not to listen to... The instinct belonging both to me... And my wolf...

We just want our family protected... And the pack peaceful so that our family can thrive...

It's surprising for my normally indifferent wolf to actually have feelings about the pack one way or the other, other than the willingness to tolerate them... But things have been changing lately... Because we both know that Addy needs the socialization of having a pack and that he's going to bloom into a wonderful Luna if given the proper time and space to do so.

If it's good for Adrian... My mate and the Sweetheart carrying my child... Then it feels like it should be a part of our lives in whatever is the healthiest way possible...

"I love you too, Daddy."

...

Adrian

...

My words cause Silas to jump, but I know it's only because like me... He gets lost in his head sometimes... And after yesterday it's more than understandable...

But I'm met with a smile that makes me so much more than happy that he's holding me tight and close... Even with the latest strange tragedy... Our love for each other stays strong and steady... Because we know that through thick and thin that we will always have each other...

It's comforting and reassuring... And I know that Daddy feels that way too...

"I always will, Princess... Now, how about we get you up for some vitamins and French toast?" Silas drips with sweetness as he lets his words settle around me like an extra added layer to our cuddle... The images he nestles in my mind that of powdered sugar-dusted fluffy French toast with berries and syrup... The tinge of stress and sadness in the back of his mind that he's asking me not to notice something hard to ignore... Even though I know he needs me to right now... He needs a little bit of normality before we have to deal with the real heaviness of the day...

...

Silas

...

It's times like these where I feel like my Adrian is truly a superhero... And that I'm grateful for our mind link because it lets me say all the things I know I need to say without the trauma of vocalizing them... Because asking Adrian to please let me make him breakfast so I can put off going into the backyard so I can spray off the... The grass... 

Asking it out loud would have caused me to break down in tears again... Because yesterday feels like a raw wound in my side, with the trauma of it all a constant shoving of salt into the injury... Because it keeps replaying every time I blink... And every time I close my eyes...

But because we are so close, with our minds so intertwined... Adrian knows exactly what's happening in my head... And he's thoughtful enough to give me support and love in exactly the way that I need...

I just hope that when he needs me to return the favor that I'm able to be at least half as good as he is at soothing me when soothing him... And that just like me... He knows I love him.