Dead inside.
I was.
I can't even like the thought of it...
why?
Dead inside, I was. Tears want to roll down each of my cheeks but just couldn't, they won't come out because they end forming everything down my throat. I wanted to scream just releasing some pain, but how could I even if I can't create a sound?
Yesterday I was dead, tonight I'm dead, and tomorrow I'll die. Same circus I've been dancing, same circus tent I've been giving shows. Who is the real clown is it my problem or me? If I could guess I'd say it's the world. It fucked up my life that I don't even know where to point my direction at, that I don't even know where on earth on road I should start, that I don't even know if music or singing can make it feel better. I couldn't cry, like a statue body and thought couldn't move.
I was finally dead inside and now all I'm waiting is to finally die outside, when will it ever start? Love can't begin with it.
They say I got good group, fresh conversations, wild dreams but who am I to even fall for that?
Dead like the feeling of losing your favorite toy.
Dead like couldn't answer the teacher's simple question.
Dead like stepping accidentally in a mud with your new pair of air force.
Dead like not wanting to go to school.
Dead like starts.
Dead like a fan that just stop working.
Dead, dead, dead.
Im so lost right now that I don't know what to write anymore.
You know when we feel public pain it'll vanish, but a secret pain will forever not.
