Fandango [Josh Kiszka] Book One

Old Heart

Day Twenty-One

Luanne watched Mickey and Emmie chat walking towards the boys SUV. Everything inside her told her that something wasn't right when she woke up this morning and she couldn't place it. The sun was beating down and the sky was clear, everyone seemed at peace except for her. 

"Was I that bad last night?" Emmie asked getting into the backseat sliding in beside Danny and Sam. 

"No! You were great! Nothing but drinking and dancing!" Sam shouted as the door closed. 

Emmie hadn't remembered anything from last night. Sam did. He remembered every little thing in agonizing detail. He professed his feelings and not only did she not say it back, she didn't remember. Looking Toward Mickey, Sam made his eyes wide which she quickly registered changing the subject immediately. 

"How about Sleeping With Sirens today? Jake you had an emo phase. Let's see how much you remember." Mickey stated turning up the radio as Jake grinned to himself before taking off down the road. She remembered something about him. 

Josh drove down the highway watching Luanne in the passenger seat. She was recording him consistently, missing several of the nature shots that she normally took. The music coming through the speakers was a playlist of hers that he hadn't heard before. He recognized some of the songs sensing they were a mellower vibe. 

"I love The Oh Hellos. You heard of them?" Luanne said suddenly turning the stereo up quickly.

Hello, my old heart
How have you been?
Are you still there inside my chest?
I've been so worried, you've been so still
Barely beating at all

Oh, don't leave me here alone
Don't tell me that we've grown
For having loved a little while
Oh, I don't wanna be alone
I wanna find a home
And I wanna share it with you

Luanne still couldn't place where her deep-rooted discomfort had been coming from as she sang along. She knew Josh was worried about her. She could feel his eyes taking glances at her. Checking her phone the date June, 20th flashed across the screen and all the air in her lungs left. 

Hello, my old heart
It's been so long
Since I've given you away
And every day, I add another stone
To the walls I built around you
To keep you safe

Oh, don't leave me here alone
Don't tell me that we've grown
For having loved a little while
Oh, I don't wanna be alone
I wanna find a home
And I wanna share it with you

Josh took another quick glance as Luanne had stopped singing along. The girl stared at her phone as the music continued around them and he wondered if he should pull over. The boys were in the car behind him and he wanted more than anything to text them telling them to stop. 

Hello, my old heart
How have you been?
How is it being locked away?
Don't you worry, in there you're safe
And it's true, you'll never beat
But you'll never break

Nothing lasts forever
Some things aren't meant to be
But you'll never find the answers
Until you set your old heart free
Until you set your old heart free

The tears fell silently down her cheeks as the texts from Emmie began coming through. Everything in her body felt paralyzed and cold as she stared at the date again. Her mothers message came through next. Luanne couldn't bring herself to answer any of them. 

"Can we stop? At a gas station or something?" Luanne asked softly as the song ended. 

The minute he pulled into the rest stop Luanne flew out of the car leaving her camera in the passenger seat. Josh watched Emmie hop out of the car taking off down the side walk toward Luanne. Mickey looked to him with a confused expression before realization came and she ran after the other two. Josh stepped out of the car to the guys who watched them run.