After The Ending (John Frusciante)

Chapter 8

"So, whose house is it exactly?" John questioned while walking up a rather unfamiliar street, already tired of this walk that seemed like an endless hike in this unbearably humid night.

"It's this guy I know, Ben. He usually throws phenomenal house parties, it will be cool," Bill casually replied and grinned, "Only a few minutes more and we'll be there."

"If you say so," John shrugged and continued walking, not thinking much of this supposedly phenomenal house party they were heading to.

He didn't know, who this Ben guy was and even if he had known, he would have still had some serious doubts over how phenomenal of a house party it was considering that it was a Tuesday night. Hollywood sure never slept and you could find yourself a gathering whenever you wished, but he himself wasn't so much in the mood for it and only tagged along because Bill wouldn't let him stay home. But even as he had agreed to come along, he still would have so much rather stayed behind and played his guitar or read his books, because the past week had been a strange one for him to say the least.

Ever since visiting his parents he had been feeling weird and funny and only thinking about that one person he hadn't actually thought about in a while, at least not in this way and the confusion he felt was overwhelming. He just couldn't get Amaya out of his head no matter what he did or where he was or who he was with and it was driving him crazy. Seeing her kiss this guy was driving him crazy and thinking about the moments he watched her through his window was driving him crazy and all in all, everything just seemed more than messed up.

He and Bill continued walking for several more minutes until stopping at a moderate size house, its front door and garden area definitely a lot more full of people than John would have expected.

"I told you it's going to be cool," Bill only grinned once they made it inside and John slid his eyes over the buzzing crowd.

There were loads of people, some familiar and some unfamiliar, some looking totally misplaced and some looking very much comfortable. John recognized quite a few fellow musicians he knew and other people that were acquainted with the scene he frequented, so he thought that perhaps there was at least some benefit to attending this gathering. Not that he would have actually cared even if everybody were strangers, because he had mentally checked out of this situation already before he arrived, but then he thought that perhaps this was a good opportunity to clear his head and get his mind off of the thoughts that were tormenting him.

He needed to stop thinking about Amaya and wondering about what she was up to, because he felt ridiculous and stupid and he had a girlfriend he was very much committed to. Or at least that's what he had thought up until now and that confused him even more.

When he thought about it, he actually didn't even know what was it exactly that he liked about Amanda so much, but there was something about her and somehow she managed to wrap him around her little finger until they became a couple and once that happened, John didn't really spend too much time analyzing it. She was fun to be around and she was a bit crazy during the right moments and in his own way, John appreciated that. He appreciated that there was a person, who offered excitement whenever he needed it and that already counted as something to him.

But then again, whenever he thought about it a bit more, he knew exactly what he liked about Amaya, because he had been spending days and days thinking about it and thinking about her and thinking about how talented of an artist she was and how gentle of a person she was while there was a side of her that could be so fiery and so passionate and whenever he thought about that, John could literally feel his palms get sweaty. And once his palms were sweaty, his heart was already racing, because he remembered her smell and the way her touch felt and then he thought about the times he watched her through his window and that's usually when he decided to dismiss absolutely every single thought, because they were becoming too much.