---------VERY TRIGGERING CONTENT PANIC ATTACK, AND SELF-HARM! ♥️♥️---
I shouldn't continue self harm. It hurt's, A lot. but when I make a mistake, I feel like like it necessary. I made a mistake so I shall punish myself for it. Or maybe I'm just.. Pathetic... and ... weak. Goddammit I am, aren't I... why can't I just accept that I made a mistake. GODDAMMIT! I'M SO PATHETIC AND SENSITIVE! COME ON CARLOS! MAN UP! STOP CRYING YOU SENSITIVE LITTLE SHI-... I sound.. just like.. my mother. No that horrible, horrible woman.. Your not like her Carlos! You are your own person Carlos. Your a good person Carlos! You... Are.. Tears started streaming down my face Your a really... Good person! You help people, ..you love people.
Sure I kept reminding myself these thing's I didn't believe any of my words. I ended up crying for at least 20 minutes. Then fell asleep, I am a good person. But they're are other's better than me. Mal is the queen of the aisle! (My au) She's perfect, and Evie has it all figured out, she has a whole fashion business!, Jay has all the girl's swooning over him.. Everyone know's they're place here!
But I don't have A place here, I'm just an unwanted, useless, side-kick to Mal, Evie, and even Jay. They could have defeated all of those people, without MY help. Why can't I have a reason to be here! A reason to live! I should have never have came to auradon im just a helpless, useless, annoying little shit! My mother was right! I am just useless! I'm just... Useless.
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(Short chapter everyone! It's just to show A little bit of Carlos' backstory!)
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My Side.
FanfictionCarlos' side of descendants' story is not all butterflies and sunshine's, but some is. In this world Mal is queen of the Aisle Carlos, Ben, & Jay aren't not dating anybody. Evie and Mal are dating. Ben is still king, but single lonely king. Also ju...
