Dance in the Faerie Circle

We Start with a Good-Bye

I had been dreading this day for so long, now that it was here I needed to get it over with. I looked at myself in the mirror, making sure that everything was perfect, or as perfect as it was going to be. My Grandmother had always hated black and would be mortified that my uncle had gotten his way with the dress code of her funeral. But I was rebellious, black dress? Check. Loud bright pink heels you could see me coming a mile away? Check. There was no way I was burying this awesome lady without proudly wearing her favourite colour, even if it was just on my feet.

The sound of heels from outside my room peeked my interest, my mum walked into my room and smirked when she saw what I was wearing. I looked down at her own feet and let out a genuine laugh in what felt like forever. "Well..." She says as she eyes me up and down proudly, "like mother like daughter I suppose." She gently moves a loose strand of hair from my face and we both turn to the mirror, her yellow heels standing proudly in the afternoon sunlight shining through my window. She kissed me gently on the cheek and grabbed my grandmothers pink lace shawl from the bed and wrapped in round my arms, she stood back to assess my ensemble.

"I can't think of anything that would make my mother prouder," her eyes watered and she smiled gently. This was a hard day for her too, it was easy to forget in my own heartbreak and mourning. "I bet she would be, plus we get to annoy my snobby uncle!" I joked, trying to lighten her mood. The sad look in her eyes turned to one of mischief, she loved nothing more than winding up her older brother who had always looked down on her for being a single mum. "That is true, I've spoken to all your grandmother's friends and they are also making sure to where something bright and colourful, I can't wait to see Samuel's face." She giggled.

That's what I loved about mum, never afraid to stand out from the crowd and is happy to ruffle a few feathers as she does it. An attitude both myself and mum had inherited from my grandmother. "Right then Pumpkin, are you ready to go?" She ran a hand through my soft ginger hair and ushered me towards the door. A black car was waiting outside the house, it suddenly dawned on me that this was it, this would be the last chance I get to say goodbye to my grandmother. I felt my heart break a little bit more, as it had been doing since the day we had gotten the call that she had passed.

I tried to shake it off the best I could, I knew I needed to be strong for my mum today, we hadn't seen or spoken to most of the family for years and it felt like we were going to be walking into a wolf den, my uncle Samuel being the alpha of the pack. "Nothing like a funeral to bring the family together hey pumpkin?" All though she was joking, I could sense she was nervous. She opened the car door and slid into the back seat, I followed and was immediately uncomfortable as I could feel my skin sticking to the leather seats. It was the middle of summer and leather and bare skin did not work well together.

The drive to the church was a short one, when we pulled up most of the family were waiting outside for the hearse to pull up. I caught mums sigh as her eyes scanned the guests, I decided I would be the first to get out of the car, giving her a moment to herself. I took a look around and realised that I only recognised a couple of faces, mainly some of my cousins. We were not a close family, hadn't seen a lot of them since I was about 5 years old and from what I had heard from my mum it sounded like a blessing that we were distant. I began to walk slowly up the cobblestone path, my heels clicking with each step. The church was old, gothic and beautiful, it had been grandmothers favourite place to visit and when my grandfather passed a few years back, she had practically visited every day.

As I approached the doorway where everyone was gathered, I was greeted by small, sympathetic if not slightly judgemental smiles. I silently pleaded for my mum to hurry up and get herself out of the car, I had no idea how to talk to any of them. As I stood there awkwardly hoping that my grandmother would rock up in her sparkly coffin which we had successfully fought my uncle for, I felt something wrap around me, "Lyra!" I was promptly stunned like a deer in headlights when Summer, one of my least favourite cousins wrapped me in a hug so tight I thought I could see the light. When she pulled away I felt like a baby taking its first breath, she looked at me with tears in her eyes which I would happily bet my savings on were fake and presented me with a sad smile.

"I can't believe she's gone; it feels like yesterday when we were just little kids running around her garden doesn't it?" She looked at me, expecting some sort of answer but I was so thrown off by the sudden attention I struggled to form a sentence. She shook her head and grabbed my hands with hers, "strange how it takes something like this to bring us together? I know granny would have loved to have seen us together more." I wasn't sure if I 100% agreed with that statement, but since it was a funeral and all I decided to just play along for her ego. "Absolutely, we really should make an effort to see each other more." I regretted the words as soon as I had spoken them, Summer beamed at this and quickly linked her arm in mine.

"It's nice to see you both getting along," my mums voice caused us both to turn around. My mum had never had much of a problem with Summer, they had been quite close a few years ago but I had always found her to be bossy and dramatic and I just genuinely struggled to like her, which had led to a few heated arguments between my mum and my uncle Samuel over the years. Summer finally let go of my arm to give my mum one of her suffocating hugs, "I've missed you, auntie Ruby," I couldn't help but roll my eyes which quickly prompted my mum to shoot me a glare from over Summers shoulder. Mum pulled away and smiled sweetly at her, "I've missed you too, sugar." My mum had a habit of giving people nicknames, mine being pumpkin because of the ginger hair I had inherited from my dad, and Summers came from the fact that all she ever used to do as a kid was fill up on anything sugary.

I was about to say something when I noticed everyone's attention being drawn to the bottom of the church path. We all stood silently as the hearse pulled up, my grandmother in her pink sparkly coffin brought a bittersweet smile to my face. At least we had managed to get something she would love for her send off. My uncle Samuel pulled up in a black car behind, along with my Uncle Ben and his two sons Kevin and Ryan. They each looked sharply dressed in black suits and positioned themselves to start carrying the coffin. The vicar began to usher us all inside, Summer linked arms with both myself and my mum and gave us a sad sigh. "Suppose it's time to say good-bye," before I could even roll my eyes mum shot me another glare. Biting my tongue, I proceeded to walk in with them.

The service was lovely, tears were shed and speeches were made which brought forth laughter and sweet memories. Despite the formal dress code, I was confident that we gave her a beautiful send off. A sweet piano melody my grandmother had wrote for all of her grandchildren began to play as we all rose to pass by her coffin to say our final good-byes. I approached slowly, the day was finally starting to weigh on me. I had tried to be the strong one today for my mum who was struggling, I looked over at her as she stood talking to some relatives and wiping fresh tears away. I looked over at the coffin and smiled at the white Orchid I had picked out for her, it was her favourite. Shakily, I placed a hand on the coffin and had to take a shaky inhale, tears finally threatening to spill. She would have wanted us all to smile and laugh but it couldn't be helped. She was more than just the matriarch of the family, she was my role model and my best friend.

I didn't know what to say, I couldn't formulate the words of how much she meant to me and how deeply I was going to miss her and that my heart had been hurting since the day she left. Everyone else who had passed by had at least been able to say something, even if it was just a simple good-bye. It just seemed so final, these were going to be my last words to her so they should be important, but she was never going to even hear them. I felt stuck, I hadn't realised I had started to cry and shake until Summer put her arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer as if reading my mind, she whispered "there is no need to say anything, she already knows." In that moment I was thankful for her presence by my side, she wasn't always so bad. I wiped my eyes and smiled, "You're right, thank you." I hated that there was a crack in my voice, I usually wasn't the emotional type. Summer smiled but her ocean blue eyes told another story, she linked her arm in mine and we both left the church, leaving our grandmother behind. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my story so far. Please vote and leave me some feedback. :)  

~ NightShade