Chapter 14 - Love
Fri- 25. September 1977
A week had gone by and Sirius didn't speak a word to me except the necessary 'Hey' or 'Bye'. I didn't understand why he was so upset because Remus kissed me first, but deep inside I still hoped that maybe he loved me.
All that week I had been spending much time with Remus, who -to my surprise- didn't try to kiss me or tell me that he loved me again. I kind of missed it, but I also really enjoyed having him as a friend. We could laugh together, studied together and he was always very sweet to me, giving me compliments and making me smile when I saw Sirius flirting with other girls. Most of the time it was Marlene and I got really jealous of her, which did help my potions grade a lot because I always tried to be better than her.
All of this time I also watched over Peter, trying to figure out what was going on in his head, but he cut himself off more and more, even from the Marauders. I told them that it was only because our father was so strict with our grades, but I wished that I could tell them the truth. The Harpies didn't show up again, but Quidditch at night was forbidden now and nobody was to go near the forrest at night.
"So, why do you even like Sirius? He has done nothing but being a jerk to you and all the other girls at this school.", Remus asked unexpectedly when we were just making our homework in the common room. It felt like my heart slides down into my stomach, thats how embarrassed I felt. How did he know that I liked Sirius? On the other hand, maybe I was a bit obvious, staring at him for too long and smashing something every time he flirted with someone else.
"Uhm, I - I don't like him. I mean I like him as a friend..", I tried my lousy explanation, but Remus just lifted one eyebrow and made clear that he wouldn't believe anything that I was saying.
"Okay, you got me. I have a little crush on him, maybe because he is the bad boy. I don't know, he just smells so good and he looks good- ", I stopped talking instantly when I noticed what I was saying. Who I was talking to. This was still the guy who told me he loved me and now I was doting about another guy, implying that maybe Remus didn't smell or look good. "No, Remus, I don't mean that you don't smell good, you really do! And you are attractive-"
"Just cut it out, Katherine. I realized anyways that I didn't really have feelings for you, I like you better as a friend. I don't think I could ever have you as a girlfriend.", Remus stated with a cold face. Then he grabbed his books, his quill and his pell and walked up to the dorms. He left me all confused. I never expected that I would feel bad about him telling me that we would only be friends, I thought that would make me rather happy. I shook my head and got back to my homework, just when Aya came into the common room, her face shining of excitement.
"You will never guess what just happened!", she shouted happily, ignoring that everyone was now looking at her. "It's not for you, idiots!", she told all the Gryffindors who were now expecting some big news. They shook their heads and returned back to their work, whispering about Aya's weird behavior.
"Okay, remember when I kissed Fabian at the party?", Aya began and I chuckled: "Of course, not like you kept talking about that."
"Well, he just asked me out!", Aya squeaked and jumped up and down. "What? Really? Wow, that is so amazing for you! When is your first date?", I asked, really happy for her.
"We are going to Hogsmeade tomorrow, but he wouldn't tell me where he wants to take me. I am meeting him at three, after lunch in the entrance hall. I am so excited!", she said, clapping her hands. I smiled and hugged her, whispering in her ear: "When is the wedding?" Aya pushed me away and folded her arms, looking very serious: "That, my dear Scar, is gonna be in a month and - oh - did I tell you yet that I am already expecting a child?"
I tried to answer seriously as well, but then we both couldn't hold it anymore and burst out in laughter. Some of the Gryffindors gave us angry looks and one 6th year boy even told us to shut up and make noise somewhere else. In that moment, James, Lily and Sirius walked into the common room. They were laughing and Lily and James were holding hands. My heart beat faster when I saw that, I was always rooting for the two of them to finally get together and now they were.
"Oi, head boy! Tell the girls to keep it down a bit!", the boy asked James, obviously not knowing that we were his friends.
"Oi, boy I don't know.", James mimicked the boy and a few Gryffindors giggled. "This is a place to be happy and have fun and they can do it as loud as they want. Plus, I am way too happy right now. Because you see, this is Lily, my official girlfriend after fighting for her for 6 years and now I just told her that I love her and -here comes the best part- she loves me too!" He smirked and then he just kissed Lily passionately in front of everyone else. A lot of people started laughing and also clapping, not to mention all the loud wolf whistles from Sirius and Aya.
"So much love in the air.", I said, still clapping for Lily and James. In this moment, I felt like I just wanted to tell Remus about everything that happened and just hug him. Aya laughed even louder when Lily and James stepped away from each other, Lily as red as a tomato and James smiling from one ear to the other.
"There is gonna be a little party at our dorm tomorrow night, are you coming?", someone whispered in my ear and I could smell the aftershave of Sirius, who was now standing really close with his hands on my hip. I felt my heart beating faster again, but I noticed that this was different. It was totally different from when Remus touched me. Here, I felt turned on, but with Remus I felt just butterflies. But maybe this was just my imagination, and it didn't matter anyways because Remus and I were just friends. The other thing that surprised me was that Sirius even talked to me again.
"Sure I will, but since when do we talk again?", I asked and turned around, noticing that I was closer to Sirius that I expected. I could feel his breath on my face and his nose almost touched mine.
"I noticed that I was being a douche before. You are a nice girl and you deserve to be treated better. So, will you forgive me?", he asked and I said the only thing that came to my mind right now: "Yes, sure!" He just did it every time to twist me around his little finger. I started to forget everything about how cruel he cracked my heart every time he flirted with another girl, because right now he made me feel so special and even though somewhere deep in my brain I knew that he was still the same, I thought that maybe now I could change him.
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