Embrace The Madness: Cataclysm

10. Corvus

[day 35]
"Hold on," said Frank, waving his hands around, "run that by me again."

Patrick sighed. "We had all the bags, then someone came, held us up and took them."

"You had weapons," Seamus chimed in, "there were three of you."

"And there were far more of them," said Rose, "at least a dozen, with guns."

Frank leaned back in his chair, side-eyeing Patrick while shaking his head.

"Don't look at me like that," Patrick said, "what the fuck could I have done?"

"Fight!" Frank said, leaning forward, "that's what you should have done, instead you roll over and submit, what? Because they said so?" He was now smiling and shaking with frustration, "you know, when I was in the war, there wa-"

He didn't have time to finish, Patrick had stood up and had walked out the door. Rose was about to follow but felt Seamus' hand on her shoulder, she looked back and saw him shaking his head gently.

Patrick shut the door behind him and went for a short walk. The air was now slightly cooler after the clouds had covered the sun.
Throughout his walk, not a single thought crossed his mind, only where to go.
He stopped on top of a hill under a large oak tree.
There, he sat down, his back pressed against the bark.
The cityscape made for an interesting backdrop, but it also revived many memories. He knew he had to let go and god knows he tried.
Eventually, he grew tired of staring into the distance so he unsheathed his knife from his makeshift leather sheath Noah had made for him.

It was the first time he'd actually looked at the blade. It was a large combat knife with a burgundy wooden handle. There was some kind of pattern engraved on the end. It looked like a skull with what Patrick deduced to be a pair of wrenches in a cross behind it.
He had no idea what it meant or if it had any significance at all.

Suddenly, there was a strange noise behind him, a kind of quiet struggle.
Hadiza appeared before him, slightly worn from the climb, she was quite old.

"Sorry" Patrick said, returning his knife to the sheathe, but also apologising about his anger earlier.

"It's quite alright, my love," she slowly sat on the grass next to him, "can't be easy to be you right now."

Patrick smiled but knowing she was right made him sulk again.

"How are you?" She asked.

He didn't know the answer. Ever since the outbreak he'd been so caught up in making sure everyone else was alright that he'd never stopped to focus on himself.

"I'm... surviving" it seemed like the only word he could use.

"Well," she continued, "I see the work that you're putting in, we all do, even grumpy old Frank."

"Yeah right" Patrick replied, recalling the remarks from Frank.

"It's true," she added, "I speak to him sometimes, he just acts tough, he's a little pussy cat really, a bit of a blabber mouth if you ask me."

Her accent seemed to be returning when she spoke, they then shared a hearty laugh.

"You know," she said, "you remind me a lot of my nephew."

"Really?" Asked Patrick, raising an eyebrow, "how so?"

"You're just so... alike, in the most extraordinary ways."

This made Patrick smile, as well as let out a small laugh.

"See! I knew it, you're doing more than just surviving," she exclaimed, "you're living!"

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"You said earlier that you were just 'surviving', but it's clear to me that you are so much more than that, I see it in you more than anyone."

A short while passed while Patrick though upon this newfound information.

"So... what do I do now?" He had done about all he could by himself, he needed some guidance.

"Just... do whatever you can," she said, "if you are going to be our leader, which you undoubtedly will, you need to make this world one which people can live, not just survive."

The sound of coughing broke the silence that came after.
It was Frank, who had just cleared his throat.

"Uhh, hey" he was standing there, fiddling with a worn cap he had found and sometimes wore.

"How long have you been there?" Hadiza asked.

"Uhh, long enough" he looked to see Hadiza waving her hands in a downwards motion, it was his cue to sit down and so he did.

"Look, I'm sorry 'bout what I said," he was mostly looking at the ground, occasionally making eye contact, "you did the right thing, clearly, you're alive."

It was mostly silence from there on, they all sat there, like a distant family, though only knowing each other for a month.

"So... who are these guys? Are they a threat?" Frank looked towards Patrick for answers.

"I don't know, probably just opportunists," Patrick started to shake his head while he spoke, like he was fighting bad memories, "may even just be some bullies out for blood."

"Well," chuckled Hadiza, "probably not that good at it then."

"Yeah..." Patrick replied, trying his best to conjure a smile.

And they continued to sit, embracing the sun on their skin, wondering what may come of all this, if anything at all.