Opposites Do Attract (a Dazai x Kunikida fanfic)

Chapter 7: The Kunikida Diaries

After a very long day consisting of embarrassment, paperwork, and confusion, Kunikida finally got home. And once again, he was debating on coming into work the next day. He definitely didn't want to hear Yosano's inevitable comments or checkup attempts. But he was also averse to the idea of skipping work for such a reason. On the other hand, he wasn't sure if he was prepared to see Dazai after what had occurred earlier. What to do, what to do?

It's so fun feeling conflicted, Kunikida thought. He opened his notebook and flipped through it. Maybe writing something down would help things. He looked around just to be sure he was alone. He was, of course, but it never hurt to double-check, did it?

But what if Dazai breaks in? Kunikida thought. He knew that maybe it was illogical to think such a thing, but well, this was Dazai we're talking.

Nonsense. If he's too lazy to work, then he's probably too lazy to come all the way to my house, Kunikida reconsidered. The reasoning made sense. It was settled.

Or was it?

Dazai would have more fun breaking into my house than doing any sort of work, and he's not too lazy to do what he would deem fun. What if he is actually going to break in? What if...HE'S ACTUALLY ALREADY HERE?!

With that thought in mind, Kunikida anxiously scanned the room. No sign of Dazai...but what if he was hiding somewhere?

"Dazai, are you here?" Kunikida called out, continuing to look around.

No answer.

"Dazai?" Kunikida repeated.

Still nothing.

"Hmmm..." Kunikida muttered. He then went through every room in the house, checking for his mischievous partner.

But Dazai was nowhere to be found.

Ok, it looks like he's not here. Thank goodness, Kunikida thought, settling back down on the couch.

Once Kunikida was completely sure he was alone, he flipped to one of the newer sections in his notebook, one that he couldn't ever let anyone see...not yet, at least. Due to this, he'd been a lot more protective of the notebook lately. He usually was anyway, but he really didn't want anyone to see the new section. If he did, Yosano (and maybe even Chuuya and Ranpo) would never let him live it down. Wait, no. Chuuya was less likely to tease Kunikida, so he probably just had Yosano and maybe Ranpo to worry about. As for Dazai, Kunikida definitely couldn't let the maniac see it, for the section was about none other than him.

Yep. That's right. Kunikida wrote about Dazai quite a lot. Actually, quite a lot would likely be an understatement, maybe the understatement of the century. He didn't intend on letting anyone know this secret of his, but it was true. He just wrote whatever he wanted to tell Dazai but didn't know how to actually say it. Writing for the win.

Kunikida then began to write.

Kunikida's log #10: yesterday when I met Chuuya and asked for advice about how I hadn't been as mad at Dazai lately, he suggested that I might like Dazai. I do admit, I was quite shocked by the suggestion. If I had asked anyone else, I doubt that would be the conclusion they would come to. Chuuya is something else. And I hate to admit it, but his words have been on my mind since yesterday. This whole time I've been wondering...is it true? Do I like Dazai? I've tried to deny it, but when I really think about it...I don't hate him. I know everyone may think I do, and maybe I do act that way, but I really don't hate him. I couldn't have asked for a better partner. Sure, he annoys me to no end with his perpetual laziness and constant attempts to throw a wrench in my perfectly ideal schedule, but despite all that, I can't bring myself to hate him. Why else would I try to make him promise not to die? Why else would I stop him to the best of my ability every time he tries to die? I don't want him to die. I don't know what I'd do without him. I genuinely don't want him gone. Which then brings me to today's occurrence. I overheard Ranpo giving advice to Dazai. Apparently Dazai's been confused, too. I don't blame him. This is pretty confusing for both of us. Anyways, Ranpo was originally the only one giving advice at first, but then Yosano came in and made the same suggestion as Chuuya. I burst right into that room and demanded to know what she meant. But unbeknownst to me, Dazai was still there, and that moment of awkwardness...dang. It was very awkward indeed. And worst of all, Yosano kept going on and on about that narrative she had about me and Dazai. She thinks we're in love. I swear, I was ready to die of embarrassment, and I'm sure Dazai was, too. I'm eternally grateful to Ranpo for stopping her when he did. Our lives were spared. But now I don't know if I should come into work tomorrow. What if she starts making comments again? Or worse...what if she keeps trying to give me a checkup? And about Dazai...I'm not sure if I can face him just yet. I doubt he'll be able to face me, either. We're probably both still embarrassed as all heck. I've considered asking Chuuya for more advice since I'm still pretty lost. But what if he doesn't have any more advice to give? If not, I'm sure I can figure this out on my own. Of course, I'll also need to figure out how to avoid Yosano. Despite what she may think, I don't need a checkup. Not at all. I've never once needed one, for I am very healthy. Let it be known that I don't need checkups.

Back to Dazai though. As I previously mentioned, I've never truly hated him. Not once. Not when he hasn't helped on missions despite my constantly asking him to. Not even when he's screwed up my schedule in the worst ways possible. He's just impossible to hate. I told him that so many times back when I had amnesia, and while it's true that I was under the influence of memory loss, I wasn't lying when I said that. Every time I complimented him while I had amnesia, I meant every word I said. Except for when I said I couldn't understand why anyone would dislike Dazai. I can understand why some people don't, but that's not the case for me. The truth is, when Chuuya and Yosano made those claims, despite my denial, deep down I did find myself agreeing with those claims. Sure, my stubborn self wouldn't admit it, not yet at least. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't like Dazai. I only hope I didn't make him feel rejected when I said I didn't like him. I just wasn't ready to say it yet...but maybe I will be sooner rather than later. And honestly, what's not to like about that scoundrel? He may have his annoying moments, but his good qualities outweigh those. They really do. No, forget what I said earlier. Maybe I don't just like Dazai...maybe I love him.

Kunikida finally took a break from writing. It's amazing how much I can keep writing once I start, he thought. He then read over everything he had just written down. He turned as red as a tomato again as he glanced at that last part.

(A/N: at this point Kunikida's probably more of a human tomato than Dazai 💀)

...Did I really just admit that? Kunikida wondered. He double-checked the page. Welp, it would appear that I did. Note to self: don't let anyone see this. He looked over the page yet again. Part of him couldn't believe he'd actually written something so open.

Despite that thought, Kunikida did feel a sense of relief since he finally let it out somehow and somewhat stopped being in denial. Even if he hadn't spoken it, he'd written it down, and that worked just as well. Now to actually find a way to tell Dazai...