Black In Black

Love and Hate, And Its All My Fault

I kept my head down, against the bed. I had no shirt on, only a thick wrap covered my chest. I didn't think much of it though, as Bunny was stitching my side.

I had denied pain meds so I would feel it. I needed it, to keep me in this reality. Yeah, I quivered in pain as Bunny patched me up but I wasn't floating off into something else then now. Here, with Jack in the bed I was leaning on.

the pain subsided, before I felt a sticky pad being pressed on the stitches. "There you go, Sheila. All patched up and infection free." Bunny said softly, as he stood from his crouched position. "I'll leave you alone for a moment, with.. with him."

"Alright," I croaked out finally, taking a deep breath and lifting my head. I kept my eyes closed, I couldn't bear it. I heard Bunny set something on the side table before leaving and closing the door.

I opened my eyes to see a glass of water and a small paper cup with two white pills inside, pain meds. I looked away, to Jack. He was beaten to no end, the sight of him making my head fall back to where it was.

Its my fault.

His forehead had opened up again, now with another open wound on the back of his head. Bunny said he probably had a concussion. He was bruised all over, his neck, his chest, and most importantly his stomach. He had no internal damage, that we know of. Now, he was unresponsive but stable and breathing. Now, he was.

After he was struck and my vision faded back, Jack had fallen, and wasn't breathing. the blow hit him square in his chest, making his heart stop. My fire had went out at the sight, as Bunny pulled me from the fight and instructed me how to give CPR. It felt him forever till Jack started to breathe, his heart popping back to life. The thought was printed in my brain forever. He died. For a moment, he was dead with no hope coming back.

My Mother, was dead. Thankfully. I didn't bother asking how or what happened, I didn't want to know. The moment her connection on everyone broke Eva had snapped from the control, she had on her. She was a crying mess the entire way back, as she apologized and explained everything to us. I only half listened, I had too much of my focus on the bleeding, possibly dying (again) boy whose head was in my lap.

Thankfully what happened wasn't fatal. As long as he wakes up, he'll be fine.

I was suddenly aware of the even, monotone beep from Jack's other side. It was a heart monitor, Bunny told me. North had a number of high tech medical instruments. His heart was beating, evenly and healthily, thanks to me. Even though its my fault he died in the first place I brought him back. 

I shakily ran my hand under his thick blanket and found his hand, lying limply at his side. I held it, tangling my fingers between his chilly ones. This time, he didn't hold my mine back. He didn't twitch, he just layed almost still, as his chest rose and dropped with his breaths. 

I set my forehead back on the edge of the bed, as I heard the door quietly open. I looked up to see Dad. 

"How do you feel?" He said softly, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. 

I didn't answer, I didn't know how. My side hurt, a low, aching pain now but I could care less about that. My chest felt.. hollow.

He had walked over and set his hand on my back, as he began rubbing circles like he did when I was a child, waking up from a bad dream. I wish this was just a bad dream. Quick, someone pinch me and wake me up.

"He'll be okay," Dad said after a moment. "I can see it, he's dreaming. He's not in a coma like that rabbit predicted."

"Thank God.." I grumbled softly, looking back down to the soft sheets. Thats another thing that hurt, my head. My dad's words seemed to float around me like a  reassuring blanket, telling me that he'll be okay over and over.