𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐍 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐒| Eli Moskowitz

xvi. 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐣𝐨?

Anxiety attacks were something Kody got bad when he was a kid. Usually, it was his own fault. His brain would think of too much at the same time, overwhelming him to the point of having horrible anxiety set in. As he got older, it became easy for him to avoid thinking to hard or having to much go on at once. He limited himself, made life simple were he didn't need to have so many thoughts at once, where he could stay calm and hold himself together.

But Demetris words were haunting him, putting him into a form of taken over anxiety. Then he saw him on the ground, arm broken. He could still hear Tory and the others, how happy they were for something like that to happen. Then there was Hawk. The one that broke his arm in the first place. Kody genuinely thought he wasn't gonna do it, wasn't gonna go through with hurting someone to that extent. Between all that, it was over powering, it was taking over his brain and causing his heart to race, his entire body to feel like it was set on fire.

"Kody?" there was a voice on the side of the door, knocking. But, they were irrelevant right now. Apart of him couldn't even hear them, so tuned out, the only noises in his head where the sound of his friends laughter and cheers. Kody pulled the medicine cabinet open, knowing his dad kept his anxiety pills in here from when he was younger, incase it happen again. He pulled them from the back, causing everything before to fall infront of him. But like everything else, it didn't matter. "Kody!"

He pushed down on the lid, twisting it. It opened with ease. "Kody!"

"What!" He yelled when the door opened, his hands thrashing around as the pills in the bottle flew everywhere.

"Are you okay?" Alaska asked, alarmed by all the pills. "Your back door was unlocked."

He wasn't one to cry often, he wasn't the emotional type when it came to sadness. He'd have a happy cry plenty of times, but rarely when he was sad. But, right now, he did cry. He shook his head. "There just for anxiety."

"What happened?" she asked in worry, walking into the bathroom more as he sat on the ground when feeling dizzy, putting his hands on his eyes when he cried. Alaska leaned over, wrapping her arms around him from the way he balled himself up. He didn't hug her back, but he didn't need to.

"I don't wanna be this way anymore." he cried, his hands clasped around her forearm tightly.

"It's okay." she didn't know why she was promising to be okay, nor did she know what he was talking about, but she said what she could. Maybe that's all he needed, just for someone to say it would be okay. He needed someone like Demetri to remind him who he was, how happy he use to be, how much he use to genuinely enjoy his life and take pride on being a good person. He needed someone like Alaska to remind him that everything would be okay.

"Where were the two of you?" Hawk stormed over to Kody and Alaska when the next morning rolled around and he saw them near his locker. Alaska took one look toward Hawk, leaving for them to talk. "Where's she going?"

"Class, probably." Kody inhaled, grabbing his locker combined.

"Where were you? I waited for you to show up to practice. We got new recruited. I don't think I can handle it by myself." he spoke, voicing his problems, his pain, his concern. That's all it was, it was about him. "Sensei Kreese got Kyler to join."

"Then quite." he said in return, looking at him with a sigh.

"Quite? No." Hawk gave an odd look. "Why would- did you quiet? Is that what you didn't show up?"

"I'm done with this karate stuff." Kody shut his locker, looking at him with a sigh. "It's changing me and I don't like it. I'm mean to my dad, I make my mom cry, I quiet everything I loved, all for what? To look tough and have people afraid of me? I don't want people to be afraid of me."

"Because you love it." Hawk stated with a serious look. "You can't quiet. We do this together, we love it."

"No, you love it." Kody stood up for himself. "And I do whatever you do because I don't want us to end up like you and Demetri. I don't wanna do that anymore. But, i'm not gonna just sit back and wait for my arm to get broken either."

Hawk looked taken back by what he said. "Is that what this is about? I didn't-"

"Yeah, you did." he cut him off, because for once it needed to be about what he wanted and what he was saying. "If you want to continue our friendship, or whatever it is, then you need to walk away with me."

Hawk looked in disbelief. "You're gonna make me choose between you or the dojo?"

"No, i'm making you choose between me and being a horrible person that makes the person you once were seem unrecognizable." he corrected him quickly with a sad look in his eye. "I know you didn't like him, but I liked the guy that walked into the hair salon, looking for a change, a lot more then I like a bully that goes around and breaks peoples arms just because they're on different karate teams. Do you not realize how insane that sounds?"

"So, you're some wise guy now? You just change over night?" he looked at him in disbelief.

Kody shrugged. "You did too."

Hawk stared at him, squeezing his fist and not being able to decide if he felt more angry or upset. Kody waited, looking at him. "So what? Now you leave the dojo so you make our new recruit do the same?"

"I didn't make her do anything." Kody snapped at him defensively. "But i'm not gonna get my friend involved in Cobra Kai and let her ruin her life over it."

Hawk scoffed, nodded his head. "So, because I got you to join the dojo, I ruined your life?"

Kody shook his head. "I didn't say that."

"No, you just implied it." he looked at him, and this time it was more hurt then anger. "Whatever, you can run off with your ex and join the theater and get back on the soccer team. Let me know how that goes for you when you get your ass kicked."

"By your friends." Kody stated with a raise of his eyebrows. "Because that what we do, we hurt people just because they aren't horrible people. I don't want that life for me anymore. I was hoping neither did you, but it's pretty clear where your decision lays."

The bell rung, Hawk stared at him. Kody waited for him to say something, but he didn't, he just left.

•

kylie speaks

hawala :(((

i love how kody and alaska
interact through out this
book, it's like a baby preview
for season five for cry baby