starts with good bye

good bye lexi

Hello i'm Mckayla i have dark brown hair that sits a bit below my shoulders my eyes are green i was sitting in my flat. when My phone went off in the back pocket of my jeans it was my bff lexi's mum asking me to come to the hospital i made my way there on the next bus. I got there and lexis brother Alex came running out to me and asked if i knew about her self harm and told him i didn't i knew she was i mean she was always in longs slaves and jeans never wore shorts or singlets her mum bought me in to see her she look really bad the doctor said she was in a comer that she would probably never one out of her mum handed me a note i walked to the hallway to read it.

To the most wonderful best friend anyone could ask for.

I know me committing suicide may come as a shock to you but it what i feel is best for me i hate how my mum and dad all away fight over me and Alex and money is just im over it and Caleb im over him telling me he loves me and then sleeping with who ever he wants. Im sorry im doing this for me and i'm sad i'm leaving the best friend in the world behind i'm so so sorry if someone finds me and you get this tell them i want to die there nothing left this world for me.

Love lexi.xx

I just burst into tears her brother came out to see me and i told him she doesn't want to live any more she just want her life to be over. He just hugged me and said the rest of his band would be here soon he told me what was in the note she had written him about how she want me to be happy and life on with him. He told me that she wrote and said that she sees the way we look at each other and that she wants us to be together. He asked me if i wanted to stay with him and his band. lexi loved staying with her older brother and band mates. I sad i would love to The rest of his band arrived. As the band walked in to see her they hugged me then Alex and Ryan offered to drive me home and get some things.

Well I've been staying with Alex for a week now we all can't focus on our jobs Alex works at a music shop i work at a cafe across the road from his work he would always come in for a coffee he would txt me and ask when my break was hand he would come over 2 minutes before i started it just so i would make him a coffee we talk about how it would of been nice to have lexis here planning on moving in with her brother and his band (btw his band is all time low) the moving date is tomorrow Saturday the boy are going to help me move just as Alex was about to go back to work his mum rang and said to get his but to the hospital he said something like ill bring Kayla and next thing i know i'm in his car on the way to the hospital we made our ways up to the room she was in before we walked in he grabbed my hand and said no matter what we have each-other. I love u Mckayla. we walked in and lexis mum said she was not responding to anything and they need to pull her off the meds which will mean she died which was what she wanted i ran out crying and looked through my photos on my phone there were a lot of photos of me and lexi and all the memories ill have with me for life and i know she would be happy im with Alex. i went back in and took Alex's other hand he was holding lexis hand and her mum had her other while the hearts beepy thing stopped and was just ringing in our ears Alex hugged me as tears fall down our faces i let go of him to lest his mum hug him i went and said my final goodbye to lexi. Goodbye my beautiful amazing friend i already miss u and kissed her forehead as tears ran down my cheeks more i ran out of her room to find my brother jack i cried on his shoulder while Alex said goodbye to his baby sister i couldn't imagine all the pain hes going though. Jack told me to let Alex be and if he wanted me there then good but if not to go.I knew what he meant i tole him that i was in love with Alex and he seem okay with that for now but he had that look of if he hurts you i will kill him. Me and jack went into the room and they wore working out who was going to speak and her funeral and then i told them to go home and rest and they could tack about that tomorrow because they both looked shocked. I drove Alex home and he looked sad. i was making him food as he waked up stars with some of lexis favor movies and asked me to make some popcorn and join him i said be there soon. Just as i was about to go up stars Ryan came home and stared yelling im home as i told him to keep his voice down and told him what had happen to lexi he asked how Alex was tacking it i said he im about to join him in his room to watch some of lexi favor movies "I've notices how close you and Alex are getting" said Ryan "yea he told me he loves me before when when in to her room today" i told Ryan he said not to mess with him or he would kill me. I walked up stars and we started waiting the fast and furors and we wore talking he asked me i wanted to sing any thing at her funeral with him and i said and acoustic version of remembering Sunday it was on of the song she loved he was looking tried. So i told him to get some rest he agreed with me and i went and took the plates down stars and told the boys i was going home. Jack didn't want me to but i told him i would be fine. I pulled in to my drive way and i stared crying i got out of my car and walked in my flat looking around all i could see was photos of me and lexi and i sat in my lounge and cried and rang jack he was coming over to help me collect the photos for a board at the funeral he got there and he picked me up and said he was going to tack me back to his house with him because i cant be alone for 30 minuets with out crying. So i went into my room and packed a bag and he took me home with him Alex had moved from his room to the lounge up stars lounge watching more fast movies with the boys i told then that i was going to sleep i went to my room and fell asleep i woke up to the sound of my phone it was Alex.