Keeping Secrets

Library

PEYTON

I replayed that night over and over in my mind, several times a day, for the next few weeks. Beau had still been in my bed when I'd woken up the day after the concert, lying beside me with my head resting against his chest and his arm draped around my back. I'd felt warm and comfortable, and it had been the absolute best night of my life.

All we had done was kiss, but it had been spectacular. Beau knew what he was doing, that's for sure. I could tell from just that night that he could be soft and gentle, or more authoritative and bossy, and either one was fine with me. I'd been completely content in his arms with his warm mouth on mine, and Beau had seemed to be as well. He hadn't pushed for anything more than that.

The sun had just risen when Beau had given me a gentle kiss goodbye and left me in bed to catch a cab back to the hotel. I was still there when Amanda showed up a couple of hours later, all buzzing with excitement from her night with Dane. She told me all about it while she picked at one of my boxes of cereal.

According to Amanda, everything with Dane had gone great. On the way back to the hotel, Dane had been recognized by a few fans, and she'd found that exhilirating. She'd stood next to him as he signed a couple of autographs and posed for a couple of pictures.

The thought of that much attention made me a bit uncomfortable, but Amanda seemed to love the fact that she'd been out with a famous drummer.

Dane was just so awesome, Amanda had gushed, smiling with her entire face as she described how strong and cool he was. They had slept together, and she was so ecstatic about it that she shared a few more details than I needed to know.

She wasn't as excited when I asked if she thought Justin would find out. Her eyes had narrowed, and she'd glared at me for a second before she shrugged it off and said she didn't care.

I wasn't sure that was the case, but I was happy for her. She had thirsted after Dane ever since we met him in Justin's garage, and that dream had finally come true. But when she told me Dane had said he'd call her later that week, I began to worry. I hoped for her sake that he would, but I also wanted her to understand that it was most likely just something he said.

"So, what happened with you and Beau?" she asked, like she just remembered, when it was time for her to leave. "Did you finally give up your v-card?"

"Um, nothing happened. We came back here because you were in his room. He slept on that side of the bed," I said and pointed to the left side, "and I slept right here."

"Really?" she asked and looked a little disappointed. "Nothing happened?"

"No."

For whatever reason, I couldn't bring myself to tell Amanda that Beau had kissed me and made my stomach feel like it was full of butterflies.

I didn't tell anyone.

Amanda didn't hear from Dane that week, or anytime thereafter. At first, she thought it was because the band was busy getting ready for their tour, but as the days became weeks, she stopped with the excuses. I knew she was upset about it, and that it bothered her, even though she tried to play it off like it didn't matter.

I hadn't heard anything from Beau after that morning either. But I also hadn't expected to, so it wasn't like it was surprising. I'd hoped, of course.

Still did... sometimes.

When my phone buzzed on the table, I expected it to be Amanda. We were planning our Thanksgiving break, but it wasn't.

"Peyton," Becca hissed, louder than was appropriate for the library, and I realized I had zoned out. Again. I'd been doing a lot of that lately.