Apparently, I'm Dead

Chapter Thirty Five

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MAGNUS

"Senor, let me whack him!" Jack pleads. "You heard what he said about me and my amazingness. I know that I'm going to accidentally betray you and help start Ragnarok, but he doesn't have to rub it in every time we meet!"

Loki looks completely, annoyingly unperturbed. "I was simply pointing out a well-known fact that every intelligent being could find out. If you cannot handle the truth, Sumarbrander, you should stop wasting your time with these sickeningly good halflings and accept your fate as the weapon of Surt."

I have to keep a very tight hold of Jack to keep him from thrusting himself through Loki's chest, and even then, I lurch forward a little bit.

Loki looks down at the sword tip that is inches away from burrowing itself into his chest, and scoffs. He stares me straight in the eyes and says, "You see? You cannot even bring yourself to kill me, although it would be in your best interest."

I smirk. "It was really more of a stalling tactic than anything else."

"A stalling tactic...?"

Percy's triumphant voice echoes over the water. "A stalling tactic."

Loki whips around just in time to see Jormungand eat the mixture of the sedative. Instantly, the World Serpent begins to waver like a stereotypical snake that's been charmed by a snake charmer with one of those flutes.

Loki's mouth twists into a snarl, but he just as quickly flattens it out into a fairly convincing look of betrayal. "My son! You would choose these mortals over me?"

The snake hisses something, and Percy translates. "He says that you chose Magnus over him first."

Loki looks affronted. "How could you accuse me of such a thing without proof?"

Percy doesn't even wait for Jormungand's words before answering drily, "Last year, you forgot his birthday because you were too busy at the flyting with Magnus." He pauses, then snickers as the snake tells him something else. "He's also extremely upset that you didn't win."

Loki's shocked and offended face makes me want to laugh. "I didn't win? What does he mean...? Magnus cheated! That's why I didn't win!" He sounds whiny, about five years old.

T.J. scoffs. "What do you mean Magnus cheated?"

"Flytings are about insults! About cruelty! Not about whatever he did!"

"You mean talking about friendship and..." I cough, a bit embarrassed, "love," my eyes dart to Alex and then just as quickly dart away, "isn't allowed?"

"And you're telling Magnus to play by the rules? The hypocrisy is strong in you, mother who is currently father," Alex drawls, but I notice her cheeks are as red as mine, and she keeps glancing towards me almost shyly, which is really out of character for her.

There's a snort as Percy processes the next statement Jormungand makes. "I forgot to mention," he says to Loki, "I promised your son that you'd end up in a walnut."

The snake seems to nod, and then falls into the water with a large splash. The water rushes towards us, threatening to sink Harald's boat, until Percy raises a hand. The water stops moving abruptly, then sinks back into the harbor until the surface is flat again.

There's a beat of satisfying silence.

Then Loki, apparently realizing that he's been beaten, starts to disappear, but I pounce on him and grab his arm. He snarls at me. I roll my eyes, trying not to show my fear.

"Magnus," Percy says softly, menacingly. His eyes are on the god in my hands. "Call your father."

I start. "My... father? You mean, Frey?" When Percy nods, I blink, startled. "Gods don't just come when I call."

"Try it," Sam suggests, eyeing Percy, "you might be surprised."

I give him a dubious look, but do as he says. "Um... Frey? Father? Could you come help us with Loki?" I make eye contact with Percy, who mouths something to me. "And could you bring a walnut?"

The air heats up, on the verge of being uncomfortable if I wasn't resistant to heat. My father appears in all of his Hollywood viking glory. "You called, son?" he says, looking slightly miffed. I'm assuming that he's not used to being summoned to places.
Percy, in contrast to my father, looks slightly smug. "I told you he'd come," he whispers.

"How'd you know?"

He shrugs. "I had a feeling. I'm basically a god magnet, I swear."

Frey's eyes bore into Percy's. "You do have a certain aura around you..." He pauses, then shakes his head. "But never mind that. What was it you wanted, Magnus?"

I point at Loki. "I want him back in a walnut."

Loki rolls his eyes. He has composed himself, but I can feel the tension in his arms. "Frey, my old friend! You're looking..." he trails off, sneering, "as soft as ever."

"Loki," Frey says mildly. "You're looking as trapped as ever." He snaps his fingers and a walnut appears in his hand.

Loki somehow becomes even tenser. "Samirah," he says through his teeth, "be a dear and go destroy that walnut for me, would you?"

Sam visibly struggles for a moment or two before saying, very defiantly, "No."

Alex cheers silently, and I let out an involuntary whoop. Percy looks slightly confused, but plays along anyways, waving Riptide around in a vaguely celebratory manner.

Frey tosses the walnut at my feet, and Jack pierces it enthusiastically. Loki tries to say something before he's sucked into the tiny prison, but it's too late. He's tornadoed into the nut before he can say something rude and divisive.

"Well, that was anticlimactic," Percy says, breaking the silence.

"A bit," Alex agrees. "I was hoping for a bit more whining and complaining from my mother."

Percy is obviously confused but decides not to ask. Instead, he asks to be taken back to Valhalla. Frey agrees, and puts his hand on my shoulder. It takes us a while, but eventually the entire crew of the Big Banana has linked arms.

I feel a pulse of warmth through the hand on my shoulder, and it passes along our chain. We dissolve into a summer breeze, and float gently on the air.

Well, that's a bit of an exaggeration. It's not nearly that peaceful, but it's light years better than Percy's water thing.

We reform in the dining hall of Valhalla. I hear groans when I see who's there.

"Welcome back, heroes!" Odin says cheerfully.  

There are too many people to keep track of in this book. Also, I have a FanFiction.net account now, under the same account name and with the same stories. 

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ATOTALMUSICALNERD