Consilium (Lawyer Kylo Ren x Reader)

Chapter 10

Your POV:

You hadn't had sex in months and you hadn't had good sex in years.

Usually, you wouldn't be one to notice something like that. Orson had done a thorough job of destroying most of your self-confidence and sensuality over the years. He hadn't been your first, but the few you'd had before him were a distant memory at best.

By the end of your time with Orson, you knew your job. You were nothing but a body, a quiet fuck, an undesired sex toy. Gross and discarded. He barely ever took you while facing you, always preferring to take you from behind and when he did, he never lasted very long.

You had your suspicions that you were the last choice when Orson did fuck you, an afterthought when no one else was available. And he never, ever, cared whether you finished or not. Unsurprisingly, you could count on one hand how many times that had happened in the last two years.

You hadn't touched yourself in a long time, either - had had no reason to do so until recently. You hadn't felt desirable or sexy or had anything to ramp up your long slumbering sex drive. That is, until Kylo Ren.

The way Kylo looked at you made you feel like a person rather than an object. When his eyes drifted to your lips, you felt a pull inside of you, urging you to close the gap. When his fingers brushed your skin, you felt it all the way in your core, stoking a fire that hadn't warmed you in years, spreading and tingling across your skin. When he licked his lips or touched them like he did when deep in thought, you swore you felt the touch mirrored on your own.

You weren't sure if you were touch-starved or increasingly horny for your lawyer. Maybe both. Would it really be so bad if it were both?

You hadn't felt this playful and alive in a while. Hadn't known that this was someone you could be and enjoy. It felt forbidden and decadent and right all at once.

Everything felt too strong and too soon and too fast, but maybe that's just the way it was when you suddenly woke up again, experiencing everything with your eyes wide open. It felt like an awakening , facilitated by the unlikeliest of allies.

Despite this, you were afraid that everything was going to be snatched from you and you fought the urge to gorge yourself on Kylo Ren. While you still stayed up late to have your snacks and chats, drinking in every chuckle and smile and flicker of amusement in his eyes, you did your best to keep your cool about it. Sometimes, you sat on your hands just to avoid reaching over to touch him to make sure it was all real.

It had only been a few days and the realization made you feel crazy, but everything just felt easier with Kylo. Whereas you had struggled with Orson at every turn, it seemed like Kylo glided alongside you with minimal effort, like you were in sync. You knew it was partially the newfound taste of freedom, but you wondered if there was something else, too. Something special, unique.

The new hints of arousal that you were beginning to feel only complicated matters. You felt like a lusty teenager, hormonal and out of control, your heart beating out of your chest every time Kylo's eyes drifted to yours.

When was the last time you'd laughed like this? Found such ease in conversation with a man like this? When was the last time someone had actually cared to listen, actually listen , to your stories?

Kylo Ren made you feel attractive and powerful. It was a heady feeling and you felt drunk off of it, feelings only magnified by the smoothness of your nightly cocktail together. You didn't need the liquor, but you loved the way it heightened everything.

In those late hours, you didn't have to think about anything but the present moment. Nothing mattered except the space between you both, growing more charged by the second.