Consilium (Lawyer Kylo Ren x Reader)

Chapter 15

A/N: A little hump day surprise! Hope y'all enjoy the update! 

Kylo's POV :

What had he done?

Kylo couldn't believe that he'd stooped this low, crossed this big of a boundary with a client... but you were more than that to him, weren't you? You'd made him come in his pants like an out of control pre-pubescent boy, after all - had always made him feel like he was actively losing control.

The post orgasm clarity was like a knife in the gut but the kicker was, he didn't even feel that bad about it. Kylo Ren felt exhausted and comfortable (apart from his sticky pants) and pleasantly overwhelmed (thank you orgasm), but the guilt (for now) was pushed to the back of his mind.

All he could think about was the lulling repetition of your fingers carding through his sweat damp hair, the rise and fall of your soft belly underneath him, the fact that it'd been so long since he had felt this close to someone that it stung his eyes.

Kylo blinked back an onslaught of emotions, forcing his breathing to even out with yours, laying silently as he listened to the sounds of your nails scratching at his scalp, your breath puffing out at predictable intervals. He wanted to stay in this liminal space forever, the one right before everything officially changed, a time when he didn't have to take responsibility and he could just bask in his impulsiveness without much consequence.

He turned his head into your embrace, nuzzling into your skin and kissing under your breast. You moaned appreciatively and hugged him tighter to you, fingers never ending their trailing path through his hair, soothing patterns drawn into his scalp as he cuddled close, letting himself be lost in you.

Kylo Ren knew that he was lying here with someone he thought too much of and felt too much for, someone he shouldn't be imagining a future with at all. Except he couldn't stop dreaming of lazy Sunday mornings with you now, morning breath kisses and playful teasing in the shower, hot and heavy make out sessions before slow or frenzied fucking.

He wanted all of it and now no longer had to keep guessing whether you wanted it, too. He just wasn't so sure this was a good thing, no matter how great it felt.

***

Kylo fell asleep without realizing it, cushioned in softness and comfort, exhausted by his climax and weighed down with his thoughts.

He woke with a start, disoriented by this strange yet familiar environment and the warm, moving surface he was sleeping on. It took him a moment to remember, to flash back to the sinful sounds you made, the way you grabbed at him so desperately, the way he lost all semblance of propriety with you.

Kylo cursed under his breath to himself, propping himself gently up on his elbows to take in his surroundings and pointedly ignoring the morning wood currently digging into your thigh so close to where he wanted to bury it. Rays of early morning light were slanting in through your blinds, giving enough light to make out the apartment.

You were still sleeping soundly beneath him, head tilted to the side and face slack with sleep. He wanted to kiss you awake and feel you stir under him, wanted your arms to wrap around him lazily as you asked him to fuck you right through the morning. But he did nothing of the sort, instead opting to slowly peel himself away from you, mourning the loss of your body against his.

Kylo's thoughts were confusing, a jumbled mess of what ifs? ranging from getting disbarred to packing all of your stuff while you were asleep and proposing that you move back in with him immediately. He had to get out of this apartment and clear his head, needed to try to remember why he had come over in the first place before everything went so wrong (or did it go so right?).