A Tameranean's Raven

Chills

"Raven, you are shivering," Starfire noted worriedly. She sat up and watched the trembling girl intently. Raven was doing her best to act like she wasn't currently freezing her ass off, but she couldn't hide it anymore. Her cape only did so much to ease the biting cold. Then again, she and the others hadn't exactly expected to be caught in a blizzard during a mission. They were looking for something in the mountains and had yet to find it. In frustrated defeat, they'd decided to camp out for the night as snow blew in.
"I'm fine, Star." Raven forced a smile but her teeth chattered with her words. Frowning, Starfire moved out of her sleeping bag and crawled over to where Raven lay. She placed a hand on the other girl's forehead. Raven was bone chillingly cold.
"May I?" Starfire asked, gesturing to the sleeping bag. With a tired nod of agreement, Raven let the other girl unzip the sleeping bag and join her inside. The moment Starfire was comfortably positioned with her arms wrapped tightly about Raven's body, the half demon let out an embarrassingly loud sigh. Under normal circumstances, Raven would have been horrified at herself for such a noise, but she was impossibly cold and Starfire was beautifully warm.
Sucking in a sharp breath, the half-demon pressed herself as close as possible to her counterpart, aware of Starfire's racing heartbeat. The ends of Raven's fingers were turning blue from the cold, and with a worried expression Starfire wrapped Raven's hands up in her own to blow on them lightly.
It was a matter of minutes before Raven no longer shook from head to toe. With a content sigh, she managed to relax and the tenseness in her muscles subsided. Closing her eyes, Raven let sleep tug at the edge of her consciousness.
"Thanks, Star."
"You have a bad habit of saying you are fine when you are not," Starfire worried.
"I'm sorry," Raven winced, sparing the other girl an apologetic look, "it's a habit. I'm not used to people willingly helping me."
"I understand," Starfire nodded, her green eyes warm and inviting like the rest of her. Raven's gaze settled on the other girl's lips for a moment before quickly flicking away. There was a bit of an amused expression on Starfire's face, but she said nothing. Instead, she ran a hand through Raven's hair and placed a gentle kiss on a pale skinned cheek.
Even Starfire's lips were warm.
"Star?" The question caught Starfire off guard, but she nodded in indication that she was listening. "Is touch your love language?"
"What's a love language?" Starfire asked, curiosity claiming her features.
"Well, when you and Robin dated, did he ever do certain things to show you he cared about you?" Raven inquired.
"Well," Starfire frowned in thought, "sometimes he would give me things. Small and silly things."
"What did you do for him?"
"I would...." Realization dawned on Starfire's face. "I would touch him. I would hug him or hold his hand. Yes, I guess my language of the love is touching. Why do you ask?"
"Just curious," Raven lied. She'd had some suspicions for a while that Starfire went out of her way to make physical contact. In fact, Raven thought back to the party they'd gone to or the way Starfire slept with her arms wrapped tightly around the half-demon, and it became obvious to her just how much Starfire cared about her. It was a bit alarming to say the least. Starfire had admitted on her part that she did love Raven as more than a friend, but that concept was equally terrifying.
Raven had never been in a relationship before. She didn't know how those worked, and she was terrified of hurting Starfire or breaking the other girl's heart. She'd never live with herself if she did.
"What's yours?" Starfire asked, breaking the silence at last.
"I don't know," Raven admitted. "I tend to distance myself from people. I've never really had a chance to figure it out."
"Maybe you can now," Starfire shrugged.
That thought was both exciting and nerve racking. Raven supposed Starfire was right. She could figure it out now, but was it worth taking the risk? "Don't do that. You are too harsh. You will bleed."
Raven hadn't noticed she was aggressively biting her lower lip in thought until Starfire ran a thumb across it. It was jarring in an electrifying way. For a moment Raven forgot how to breathe and it took her a second before she decided to exhale. Part of her wondered if Star knew the effect she had, the other part realized that if Starfire did then she truly was interested in Raven.
"Look, Star...."Raven began, but she didn't know where to go from there. Part of this felt wrong. Like they shouldn't be snuggled up together while on a mission, or touching each other in such sensuous ways.
"You do not like it when I touch you?" Starfire worried.
"No, that's not it," Raven promised, taking Starfire's hands in her own. "I like it a lot actually."
"How is that a problem?" The alien girl frowned.
"It scares me " Raven admitted. She wasn't sure why the words came tumbling out, but there was no taking them back now.
"I do not understand. Am I too aggressive? How does it scare you?" Starfire, bless her heart, looked rather concerned and upset about her actions. She resembled a kicked puppy.
"You're gentle. It's not the touch itself that scares me. You remember how I told you I'm not good with feelings, right?" Raven asked. At this point she might as well get everything out in the open. She'd already started digging her grave so she might as well finish it.
"I remember,"Starfire smiled, proud of herself for recalling the detail.
"Well, you make me feel a lot of things. Things I'm not familiar with and so it scares me. When you touch me, it's...great. It's perfect, but I'm not sure what to do with myself when you do. I don't want you to love me so intensely you burn out because I can't reciprocate," Raven frowned, biting at her bottom lip again. That was it wasn't it? Her real fear. That she couldn't possibly be enough for what Starfire would want or need. It wasn't terrifying to come to terms with the fact that she loved the Tameranean. It was terrifying to realize how easily she could mess it all up.
"You will be fine. You are perfect and beautiful," Starfire insisted, her eyes earnest and warm. "You burn like the moon and I burn like the sun. We are not so different."
The sentiment was sweet enough to bring tears to the edges of Raven's eyes. How could someone possibly be so genuine, thoughtful, and sweet? How did someone like Starfire exist and remain untainted by the cruel tides of the world and time.
"May I kiss you?" Raven asked, her words quiet and hesitant. She'd wondered what it would be like to properly kiss the Tameranean for some time now. As much as she loved forehead kisses, they only brought so much satisfaction to her curiosities.
"You do not need to ask," Starfire smiled, settling her hands on either side of Raven's face. She waited patiently for the pale girl to kiss her, and when she did it was hard not smile. Raven tasted like tea and peppermint. She was refreshing, and while her kiss was hesitant, it was enough. "You taste like tea and peppermints."
"Yeah?" Raven smiled faintly, her beautiful purple eyes glinting in the dark.
"I enjoy it," Starfire admitted, a faint blush decorating her cheeks. She nearly turned away from embarrassment when Raven captured her lips in a less hesitant kiss this time. "Does this mean you are my girl of the friend?"
"I...yeah, I guess so," Raven nodded. She wasn't particularly fond of labels, but if it helped simplify things for Starfire then so be it.
"Oh what a joyous day!"
"Shhh, Star, the others are sleeping," Raven whispered amidst a bone crushing hug.
"Right. My apologies."
— — —
It was nice having that unseen barrier out of the way. Raven found it much easier to enjoy Starfire's simple affections, but she had her reservations and was quick to establish ground rules. For now, Raven didn't want the others to know too much about their relationship. Not yet anyways. To her, it would make things muddied and awkward. Especially since she'd announced her previous feelings for Beast Boy and because Starfire was technically Robin's ex-girlfriend. While she had gotten over him, he was still in love with her. It wasn't hard to tell.
Unfortunately, secrets can only be kept so long when everyone lives in the same house together. It was nearly a month into Raven's established relationship with Starfire when she was met with Cyborg's skeptical glance.
"You got something on your neck," he noted, gesturing to his own for reference. Frowning, Raven glanced at her reflection in the windows and spotted a lipstick mark on her pale skin. With a sigh, she rubbed it off and made a mental note to check for those things next time. "Star's pretty needy, huh?"
"What do you mean?" Raven asked, cautiously sitting beside Cyborg on the couch.
"Robin said she can be clingy. She likes a lot of physical touches. That doesn't bother you at all? I mean, you hate being touched," he snorted.
"It's different with her. It's hard to explain, but I never received a lot of physical affection in my life until now. It's...nice. I like it," Raven admitted.
"I get it," Cyborg promised, nudging his friend lightly. "Don't worry, I won't tell the others it's official yet. I'll pretend I don't even know."
"Thanks Cy." Raven paused for a moment before offering him a quick hug. He took it with mild surprise but didn't say anything. If he did, it'd be the last hug he ever got.
A few more weeks passed before anything else occurred. As far as Raven knew, Cyborg was the only person aware of her relationship with Starfire.
"Star, you don't have to watch the scary movie if you don't want to," Raven sighed, moving over for the other girl to sit next to her on the couch as everyone crowded around. Starfire was bundled up in a blanket looking very much like a caterpillar in a cocoon.
"You like scary movies and I would like to know what is scary about them," Starfire insisted, but she was nervous. Raven could tell the moment Starfire held her hand under the blankets. The poor girl's palms were clammy.
"This is gonna be interesting," Beast Boy grinned, eyeing Starfire mischievously. Once the boys were settled, they started the movie. It was one Raven had seen a million times before. She was unbothered by the gore, but Starfire found it quite disgusting.
"That is the stomach on the floor?" She asked, earning an amused expression from Robin as she peeked out from behind her blanket cocoon.
"This is a slasher film more than anything," Cyborg frowned, ever the movie critic. "Sometimes they have unnecessary gore."
As the movie progressed, Raven kept ahold of Starfire's hand. The Tameranean's grip tightened during particularly intense parts of the movie. Raven found it a bit charming how much Starfire wanted to prove she was brave enough for a movie like this. It was cute up until Beast Boy scampered across her shoulders as a rat.
Starfire shot to her feet with a yell of fear, eyes glowing along with her hands as she eyed the place where Beast Boy now lay on the floor laughing hysterically.
"Ugh!" With a frown, Starfire settled back on the floor. Giving a tiny huff, she collected her blanket and marched off down the hallway.
"That wasn't funny," Raven glowered, silencing Beast Boy's laugh along with Robin and Cyborg's.
"Awe come on Rae!" Beast Boy snorted. "It's just a joke."
"She wanted to watch the movie with us and you ruined it," Raven insisted.
"Since when did you get so mad about me playing pranks on her? It's not a big deal." Beast Boy shrugged, moving to take his place back on the couch.
"She wants to fit in and understand things. Even if it's a slasher film, it's important to her. Unlike you she hasn't spent her whole life on earth. She's always going to be learning." Raven's voice was harsh, callous even, and not it's usual dry tone. Beast Boy shot a glance at Robin and some sort of silent understanding passed between them.
"Raven, be honest," Beast Boy began, "is Starfire your girlfriend?"
A violent scream echoed in the background as a rather unfortunate woman was hacked to pieces.
"I...yes. She is." The admission was harder than Raven expected it to be. She watched as Beast Boy processed that information before offering a shrug and a tiny smile. Robin on the other hand looked extremely conflicted.
"I'm happy for you." He offered a smile of his own, but it looked strained. At the very least they were both being mature about things. That much, Raven was grateful for.
— — —
"Star?" Raven called, knocking softly on the other girl's bedroom door. "Are you awake? Can I come in?"
A muffled response followed, one Raven couldn't exactly make out, so she opened the door slowly in case Starfire didn't want to talk to her. When no protest came, the half demon slipped inside and let the door shut behind her. Starfire was huddled up in bed, a plethora of stuffed animals surrounding her in bright colors.
"Was the maid the scape goat for the professor?" Starfire asked glumly from her bed.
"Yeah, it was just like you guessed," Raven smiled, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. She collected a stuffed jellyfish and examined its tentacles. "The boys...uh, they know about us by the way. They figured it out."
"Oh," Starfire nodded, clutching an oversized plush dog to her chest.
"We can watch another movie together if you want. Just the two of us," Raven offered, moving to lay down beside Starfire amongst the stuffed animals.
"It's okay," Starfire yawned, watching as Raven examined a few of her stuffed companions. "That one is Raven. It's my favorite."
Raven didn't have the heart to tell her that it was a stuffed crow and not, in fact, a raven. Instead, she smiled to herself and settled the stuffed bird on her shoulder. Starfire's smile made the silly gesture worth the world. With a small giggle, the Tameranean leaned over and pulled Raven into a firm kiss.
"Are you cold?" Starfire asked, pulling back as she noticed the goosebumps decorating Raven's arms.
"No, I just got chills. That's all," Raven promised, a little embarrassed that a kiss could have such an effect on her. Starfire nodded, tucking that bit of information away for later. "Do you want to know how the move ends? I can get really detailed."
"I'd like that," Starfire decided, settling back in bed and closing her eyes to imagine everything that Raven said. It was nice knowing she had someone looking out for her, and even better knowing that person wasn't afraid to do silly little things like retell a movie. Raven was wonderful, and Starfire absolutely loved her.