Subject X (Winter Soldier X Reader)

13

August, 1957

"Have you always been this cold?"

"You think I'm cold?"

"Well I want to get to know you but it's like talking to a brick wall. I'd have better conversations with a book."
I rolled my eyes at Bucky's comment, annoyed that he was asking once again.

"I've told you, I don't want to know you and I don't care to." I replied bluntly, looking at him with as cold of a face as I could possibly give.

"You're just a real sweetheart aren't you." He halfway growled at me, rolling his eyes back.
I shut the French book closed rather loudly. This caused him to jump, widening his eyes at my actions.

"Fine."

I could see the excitement in his eyes brighten at this opportunity. For months now, Bucky has been trying to get in on my good side. Trying to win me over with his charm and flirtatious comments. Every night he would ask me if we could eat dinner together and talk, every night I told him no. It broke my heart knowing how I felt about him and doing the exact opposite of what I wanted to do. I remember the ache in my chest of what it felt like to have thought I lost him, I can't go through that again.

"Okay, um... what's your favorite color?" Bucky asked me, stroking his chin in thought while he thought of the deep question. A smirk was brought across my face, reminiscing on the memories from the past.
"What do you think my favorite color is?"

A smirk spread across his face, tilting his head in the process while thinking.
"Red?" He finally asked.

I couldn't help myself, a wide smile spread across my face. I thought about the note that he gave me, he thought so highly of me before. It seems as though he might still think of me the same way, at least I hope so.

"It is red."
Whether or not that was true, I wouldn't dare tell him otherwise. His reaction alone made my heart feel light. He looked like a kid on Christmas with the excitement he had plastered on his mug. He may as well have been a child.

"Seriously?"
I nodded. His face lit up in accomplishment, pumping his fist in a small victory. A smile was brought across my face, a real genuine smile that I had finally allowed myself to slip out. Bucky seemed to notice this, tilting his head at me.

"So she does smile." He teased me, using his foot to nudge my leg under the table. My face instantly dropped to fake seriousness as I returned his nudge with a swift kick to the calf. He hissed in pain, giving me the 'seriously?' look. I smiled even more, a mischievous smile that indicated I did it on purpose.

"I think that's one of the first times I've ever seen you smile." Bucky hummed, folding his arms over each other on top of the table. His long hair bounced to the side, providing him with a curtain.
"Why? Why are you always so cold?" He pressured on.

I was tempted to snap at him, get him to shut up and not talk about it any more. Something inside of me was tired of fighting, who knew when our next mission was going to be and we would be forced to work together once again.
"My um," I began, trying to think of the best way to approach this situation. How was I going to describe it?

"My previous partner, he died. He died because of me." I looked down at the table underneath us, tapping my fingers nervously on the table and avoiding eye contact with him at all cost. I noticed his hand come into my field of vision, slow and steady as he gently laid it on my forearm comfortingly.

"I thought he died in a car accident, I'm sure it wasn't your fault." I looked up at him, his face soft and the inside of his eyebrows turned up ever so slightly. I shook my head back and forth before returning my gaze to his eyes.