Diary of a Muslim girl

Chapter 5

On Wednesday, I meet my friend at our designated spot. On seeing her, I hug her tightly and ask her how she is. We order our favourite drinks and snacks. Mine is a peppermint hot cocoa and a tomato burrito, whereas Liya goes for the pumpkin spice latte and a cheese sandwich.

After a few sips of my drink, I feel a pair of eyes planted on me. I look up and see Liya staring at me with a small smile. Ok, why the hell is she staring at me like that?

"This is getting creepy, man!" I tell her.

"Tell me what's bothering you," she replied.

"Huh?" I think this girl is mad. Didnt't I just meet her two days back?

"Yep, you did, but no, I am not mad............yet. " she replies with a grin.

Wait a min, did I just say that aloud. Yes, yes I did. Oh great.

"So care to explain your previous sentence?" I ask.

"Here is the thing." she pauses. "I want to help you." A sigh escapes from her lips.

"Help me?"

"Yeah. I once battled depression. It went on for a long time, and the side effects are still there once in a while. It started when I was 12 with people bullying me. They bullied me for being strong and being a Muslim. I had friends, and they tried to help me, but I pushed them away. Soon, middle school was over, and 3 out of my 4 friends went to study abroad. Freshman year started, and I was still sad and confused. My only friend, Natasha helped me as much as she could. I usually went around like a lost soul, just trying to do well in school. I ignored almost everyone at school, and stayed far away from drama. Once, I even tried to cut myself. I put the blade down before I did anything I would regret in the long run. Three weeks after school started, I met you, Zoe and some other friends."

"I was also confronted by my aunt, Suzy. She could sense something was wrong. After all, she is a psychologist.She helped me recover. Helped me stitch myself back together. I was sceptical at first, but now I owe her as she turned my life a full 360 degree from the bad to the good."

"A few days back, I saw you in front of a mall with a blank face. I thought that you were daydreaming. I left you alone. A week later, you had the same look at school. You had a far away look in your eyes, and your smile was turned upside down. When Zoe walked near you, your face was confused for a second, but it changed to a wide smile in the next split second. I knew at once that it was fake. I know how it is to be like that. I knew that you were having something wrong happening to you. I want to help you, Zainab. Tell me, what's wrong? Please........ You are one of my close friends and I cannot lose you..... in any way," she ended with a sigh.

I had my eyes anywhere but her. I didn't know what to say. I want to tell her everything, but I can't. I mumbled a small "I will let you know" and rush out of the café. I can hear Liya calling me, but today, I cannot tell her what it is.

But, she will be one of the first person that I will tell to, In sha Allah. If god wills.