between us [sakuatsu and others]

chapter 8

It's the next day and today is the day

I'm going to talk to my brother. Like an actual conversation kinda talk

He said to meet up with him at the back of the school building and I agreed

As I was walking there an arm grab my waist into an empty classroom

I whined cause it hit my head in the process, what the fuckk

I looked up to see kiyoomi staring down at me, his hand still holding my waist, yeah what is happening right ... now?

"uhh kiyoomi you good?" I asked

"yeah, I'm good .." he replied, oddly close to my ear

What the frickiting frack is this

"uhh .. can you let go of me now?"

"hm"

He still hasn't move a bit

"okey for real tho, are you okey ? do you need me or something?"

"actually yes, me and hajime are going on a night ride tonight, maybe grab a few drinks on the way, what do say?"

"you could've just texted me this you know"

"yeah I know but this is just an excuse too see you're beautiful face"

Huh, what a classic fuckboy word to say

Two can play that game

"I'll text you later omi" I said and smiled

And before I could walk out he held my wrist

"I need the answer now tsumu"

I pulled him closer and said "see you tonight omi" and I kissed his cheek

He looked shock and with that I left

"I'm coming with kawaa" I called out

~~~

Sakusa's pov

"I'm coming with kawaa" atsumu called out

And I'm still in shock

How can he kiss me like that so easily? And ... somehow I feel like he's the one who's playing tricks on me

Fuck, I'm hard now.

I just sigh and walked out of the classroom to fix this .. situation

Atsumu is really something else

~~~~

Back to atsumu's pov

I'm walking into the back of the school to see osamu there with suna

I came alone cause if I bring my friends

This conversation is not going anywhere

"hey tsumu" he said awkwardly

"hey" I replied coldly

"I know you don't want to waste your time so I'll just get straight into it"

I just nodded and for some reason his so called boyfriend is looking at me with a ... curios look?

I don't know

"so I know you're pissed off about ... a lot of things and I'm at fault for that"

"yeah no shit sharelock"

"atsumu I know that back then I was cold but I have my reasons, you see mom and dad-"

Huh, this is what I hate, it's always the "I have my reasons" bullshit

This is not ... what I wanted to hear

When me and samu was only 3 years old we we're never close, well back then I thought that we have the most healthy brotherly relationship ever.

But turns out I was wrong

Osamu was mom and dad's favourite

Back then he was smart, good at volleyball and just perfect in general

And I was happy for my brother, I never got jealous of him or envy him

I was ... proud of him

I always talked to him about my problems but he just listened and ignore me ...

I never knew why tho ..

And there's me ... the twin that lives' in his brother shadows

And since I got older

I started to see what is happening

Osamu never talks to me, expect when he need's too

He never came down to help me when I was bullied in high school and when I got slapped by my dad because I got a A- on a test, he just looks at me with pity is his eyes

I fucking hated that

We even never celebrate our birthdays together, I celebrate my birthday with kawa and akaashi back then.

As I grow older I distance myself from my brother .. and my parents

Who am I kidding, We we're not close to begin with anyways

And I completely change after all that bullshit, i got tired I guess

I study my ass off until I got first at everything

And I mean everything, my volleyball game was on top and look's like everyone was shocked

Including my brother.

But even so, I was never really fully ... satisfied of my achievements and after my parent's found out about it they we're ... pissed off (?) and of course my entire family hates me

And I couldn't hold it any longer ..

I wanted to end it all

And I ... almost did

Not until kawa and akaashi found me in the bathroom

My wrist was cover in blood and I was breathing really slowly and for once I felt like someone actually cared about me

No one really knew what I've been thru expect kawa and akaashi, they found out unintentionally, and when they found out they have been by my side since ... forever

I didn't really remember anything after that but I knew at that moment I don't need my family's approval or affection cause I realize that I spend most of my life wasting my efforts just to hear the word "we are proud of you" by my family

And about my brother, he looked at me with guilt and I never hated anyone as much as I hate my own brother.

"and that's what I've been thru the past year atsumu, you gotta believe me-"

"okey stop osamu, I'm not here to hear your sad and depressed life" I said coldly "i'm not here to hear your apology either ..."

"atsumu-" before he could replied I quickly say

"osamu, I came here today to talk to you about how fucked up you we're back then and till this day. And to work things out and to catch up with you. Not to hear you complaining about you're live EVEN THO MINE WAS WAY WORSE THEN YOURS." Fuck I got carried away

I sigh

"I thought our relationship could at least have progress but I guess not .. you're still the same selfish osamu as back then." And with that I walked away

"even if you did apologies ... I would never accepted anyways"

I started to walk faster

Fuck

If I said I was fine I would be lying. It hurts so much, and the fact that he didn't even realise his own fault, pissed me off

I need a drink with kawa after this.