*A teenage girl is pouring a glass of milk. A man is shown walking down the hallway towards the room. As he is let into the room by two guards, we can see that the man is really tall. The teenage girl is dunking a little girl into the glass of milk.*
???: Mmm! No!
Lord Obake: *stepping forward* That's enough. She's ready to talk.
*Vanellope is pulled out of the milk by Fluttershy and is slammed down onto a cookie sheet. Obake manically laughs as he walks over to the table. He clears his throat and the table is lowered.*
Lord Obake: *he picks up the Vanellope's severed legs and plays with them* Run, run, run, as fast as you can. You can't catch me. I'm the Slaughter Racer!
Vanellope: You're a monster.
Lord Obake: I'm not the monster here, you are. *throws one leg at Vanellope* You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world *crumbles his other leg into dust* Now, tell me! Where are the others?!
Vanellope: Eat me! *She spits milk into Obake's eye.*
Lord Obake: I've tried to be fair to you creatures. Now my patience has reached its end! Tell me or I'll... *he grabs one of Vanellope's candy in her hair*
Vanellope: No, no, not the buttons. Not my gumdrop buttons!
Lord Obake: All right then. Who's hiding them?
Vanellope: Okay, I'll tell you. Do you know the muffin man?
Lord Obake: The muffin man?
Vanellope: The muffin man.
Lord Obake: Yes, I know the muffin man, who lives on Drury Lane?
Vanellope: Well, she's married to the muffin man.
Lord Obake: The muffin man?
Vanellope: The muffin man!
Lord Obake: She's married to the muffin man...
*A door opens and the Captain announces himself*
Captain of the Guards: My lord! We've found it.
Lord Obake: Then what are you waiting for? Bring it in!
*More guards enter carrying something that is covered by a sheet. They hang up whatever it is and remove the sheet. It is Sci-Twi.*
Vanellope: *in awe* Ohhhh...
Lord Obake: Twilight Sparkle The Magic mirror...
Vanellope: Don't tell him anything!
*Lord Obake picks Vanellope up and dumps her into a trash can with a lid.*
Vanellope: No!
Lord Obake: Evening. Mirror, mirror on the wall, is this not the most perfect kingdom of them all?
Sci-Twi: Well, technically you're not a king.
Lord Obake: Uh, Fluttershy.
*Fluttershy holds up a hand mirror and smashes it with her fist.*
Fluttershy: Ow.
Lord Obake: You were saying?
Sci-Twi: What I mean is you're not a king yet. But you can become one. All you have to do is marry a princess.
Lord Obake: Go on.
Sci-Twi: *chuckles nervously* So, just sit back and relax, my lord, because it's time for you to meet today's eligible bachelorettes. And here they are!
*Using herself as a screen, Sci-Twi presents a dating show to Lord Obake, Fluttershy, the Captain, and a few Duloc Guards.*
Sci-Twi: Bachelorette number one is a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away. She likes sushi and hot tubbing anytime. Her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her three evil brothers. Please welcome Wendy Corduroy.
*Shows painting of Wendy in her ball gown putting on the glass slipper*
Sci-Twi: Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing girl from the land of fancy. Although she lives with seven other racers, she's not easy. Just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is. Come on. Give it up for Elsa!
*Shows painting of Elsa in her slumber*
Sci-Twi: And last, but certainly not last, bachelorette number three is a fiery lioness from a 95 race car chained by a huge big heavy rock guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava! But don't let that cool you off. She's a loaded pistol who likes piña coladas and getting caught in the rain. Yours for the rescuing, Princess Sooha!
*Shows painting of Princess Sooha at the window of her tower*
Sci-Twi: So will it be: bachelorette number one, bachelorette number two or bachelorette number three?
Guards: Two! Two! Three! Three! Two! Two! Three!
Lord Obake: Three? One? Three?
Fluttershy: Three! *holds up 2 fingers* Pick number three, my lord!
Lord Obake: Okay, okay, uh, number three!
Sci-Twi: Lord Obake, you've chosen Princess Sooha.
*"Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" by Rupert Holmes begins playing. The crowd cheers.*
Lord Obake: *Gazing at her portrait* Princess Sooha... She's perfect. All I have to do is just find someone who can go...
*Lord Obake starts brainstorming*
Sci-Twi: But I probably should mention the little thing that happens at night.
Lord Obake: *Talking to himself, ignoring the former Crystal Prep student* I'll do it.
Sci-Twi: Yes, but after sunset...
Lord Obake: Silence! I will make this Princess Sooha my queen, and Duloc will finally have the perfect king! Captain, assemble your finest men. We're going to have a tournament. *smiles evilly*
Part 5 Ended.
YOU ARE READING
Hiro Hamada ("Shrek")
FantasyWhen a 14 teenage human boy with a gap teeth called Hiro discovers his swamp has been 'swamped' with all sorts of fairytale creatures by the scheming Lord Obake, Hiro sets out, with a very loud 12 year old boy named Mason "Dipper" Pines by his side...
