My Life Story. (Mental Health Awareness)

09/04/22

Tw: Dissociation?, feeling like everyone's eyes are on you and Tr4uma.
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This part contains swearing/cursing*

I was really struggling today. Everything hit me, at the worst time. The flashbacks and that simulation feeling. I almost had 2 panic attacks whilst I was out with my gf because of it. I don't even know what triggered it tbh.

At one point, the simulation feeling got so bad, I had to sit down, but once I sat down, I was really dizzy and light-headed. I don't know what could have triggered it. It might of been, because me and my gf were talking about the corner shop that was 2 minutes away from where I used to stay. I hate that little things like that can set it off that easily. It's almost impossible to go to school and not have it set off, I was in the guidance base quite a lot, the week before we broke off for the Easter holidays because of that feeling and panic attacks.

Everytime I go outside, I feel like everyone is just staring at me, especially my body. I don't know why I feel like it, its like I can feel their eyes staring at me. My gf always reasures me that no one is staring at me, but, most of the time, it doesn't work. I still feel like I'm on the middle of a circus ring. I hate being in public places, especially when it's really busy and there's a lot of people. Too many people know me, and I hate it. 9/10 people who know me, feel the need to say something and I hate it.

I know it sounds like I hate a lot of things, but it's only a few.

I know this part was short but, fuck it. Have an amazing rest of your night/day :)