Bound by Blood (A Vampire Academy fanfic)

Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of this story. These characters belong to Richelle Mead

I stayed at the hospital for 2 days after that. Lissa and Alberta tried comforting me but after a while I just stopped responding. I didn't want to go back to the academy because although I could usually handle the comments and stares, I had just lost my baby and my guard was down. If someone said or did the wrong thing, there was no telling what I would do.

I rode in the back of the SUV as Alberta drove me home and I couldn't help the tears that welled up. I was going to bring my baby here and take care of her. I was going to give her the childhood I never had.

On my way through the lobby, I bumped into Kirova. She looked shocked to say the least. She was probably wondering where my big stomach was. She looked into my eyes then at my stomach and I shook my head as a few tears ran down my cheeks. She wrapped her arms around me and at that moment I knew that she never hated me. She just had a bad way of showing she cared.

I continued walking down the corridor to my dorm and ignored the stares I was getting. A few minutes later, Lissa came in.

"You know that if you ever need to talk to someone you know you can talk to me. I might not know or fully understand what you're going through but I'm here if you just need to vent."

I just nodded. I get it, she's my best friend and she just wants to help, but right now I was not ready to talk about what had happened. At least, not without breaking down. Lissa understood that I wasn't ready to talk right now and left.

I wasn't okay and I knew it but I just wanted a break from my life for a day. For one day where Alina lived and I got to feed her milk and watch her smile her first gummy smile at me. And my life would be perfect. But those days don't exist and I can't change what's happened to me.

After a while, I lay back in bed putting my hand over my stomach, waiting for Alina to kick my hand or feel something. But then I remembered.

My baby was dead and it was all because I wanted to go to a stupid mall.

I couldn't sleep and nothing I did or thought was helping so I decided to take a walk around.

I walked for a while and eventually ended up at the location of a perfect night.

The cabin.

Our cabin.

Looking around, I couldn't help the smile that came to my face or the happy memories. The bed had the same quilt and nothing was different, except for maybe the atmosphere.

Then as fast as the good emotions came, they left. I was so angry. Angry at myself. At Lissa. At Dimitri. At the Strigoi. He was supposed to be here. To help me get through this, not because it was his blood but because he loved me. Because at this moment I needed him here. Sometimes you just need someone you love to wrap their arms around you. Even though it might not change anything about the situation, it's good to know you have their support. I needed his support. I needed to know that I was lovable. And one little call would give me the answer.

I dialed the number I stole from the academy's records and let it ring. But just as I was about to cut the call, something clicked.

"Hello?" he said. "Hello?" He sounded tired and slightly annoyed. But that didn't matter to me. As long as I could hear his voice, it didn't matter if he was tired or happy.

"Did you really answer?" I wondered out loud.

"Rose, is that you? Are you okay?"

"It's me. I'm okay." I lied smoothly. "I just wanted to hear your voice."

"Are you sure you're okay? You sound strange."

"Yeah, I'm okay." Tears cut through my sentence and I tried to hold back my sobs. "No, I'm not okay. I don't think I will be for a while. I know that you chose her but I just wanted to hear you telling me it's all going to be okay." I couldn't hold back the sobs anymore and I heard Dimitri's breath hitch as he heard me cry on the phone.

"Shh, it's all going to be fine." He cooed, whispering sweet nothings in my ear.

"Thanks."

"I wish I could hold you close and run my fingers through your hair. My imagination doesn't -."

Then the phone cut and white noise filled my ears.

What just happened?