Alive || 86: Eighty-Six [ vers. ENG ]

kaslan

The constantly closed curtains or the ban on stepping outside had never tipped me off to what was going on outside the family cocoon. Whether it was my Nanny Elizaveta or the other employees of the house, everyone had done their best to hide the outside climate from me.

Nothing was right in the Republic of San Magnolia.

Mom and Dad weren't smiling like they used to. My parents came home late. I had resolved not to be able to play with them, to see them, even to greet them. Their faces were always closed, so how could I do otherwise? The two most important people in the world to me were now burdened with too much responsibility.

And the opposition to the Kaslan family was only growing.

If I had not been a child, could I have helped them even a little? Could my words have comforted them even a little?

The worst was to come.

During this time, I remember that my mom's words were the only ones that allowed me to accept this troubled situation I was in and that I didn't even understand.

Charlize, you mustn't forget what I tell you so often...

The Republic of San Magnolia is not the enemy.

Do not hate the citizens, rather try to understand them and help them.

Those people who, driven by fear, which choose the worst must be forgiven.

You, Charlize Kaslan, carry the greatest burden.

Being born into this family can be difficult, but like all the others who have come before us, I know you have the shoulders for it.

So...

Don't look away.

Don't let hate eat away at your heart.

Unlike the great names that populate the Republic of San Magnolia, the Kaslan family tree begins three hundred years ago, just after the revolution. Yet, according to records now lost, this lineage goes back much further, to times when royalty ruled over the people. And 

if this truth is now forgotten by all, the reason is much more complicated than it seems...

But that's not the point, just an idea of what could have pushed my mother towards her own death.

I still remember the look on my Nanny's face that day when she woke me up in a hurry in the middle of the night. I also remember those armed men pointing their guns at us. I also remember my mom and dad bathing in a sea of blood. I remember the laughter, the mockery and the offensive words of these people.

Some of them were familiar. Some were parents of children I sometimes knew, some were close family friends and the rest were government bigwigs I had seen in newspapers.

That day,I don't remember what happened once I was separated from Elizaveta. I don't remember what you were yelling at those people either, mom. Maybe the shock was so great that my brain couldn't do anything but block out all information. Or maybe I'm still trying to forget everything so that it doesn't hurt so much.

Mom, tell me, what happened between the time of your execution and my waking up on a train to an internment camp? Did one of your words make it possible for me to survive that night?

Dad, tell me, why did you worry more and more about Professor Nouzen when death was waiting for you? Could someone who didn't even have Kaslan blood become so obsessed with others that he forgot his own survival?

Elizaveta, the coolest nanny in the world, tell me, don't you regret giving up your position and your own country to join the Kaslan family? If not, you would still be alive, the most beautiful and undisputed flower of the high society of a distant kingdom.

One day, if I can see you again, there are so many questions I have to ask you...

Charlize, my dearest daughter, forgive me...

I was mistaken.

Blinded by my ideals, I ended up losing sight of the greatest evil on earth: human madness.

Believe me, sometimes escape is allowed. For you, the person I love most in the world, only your happiness matters...

So live my daughter and forget everything I said.