Piggy Book 3: The Adventures

Secret Boss Unlocked: Chris and Henry vs Wonder Women

Chris and Henry were walking around Olympus together not wanting anything to do with each other. They said nothing to each other. Everything they looked at was polar opposite to each other's directions. They walked through a part of Olympus that looked somewhat oddly like earth in a busy old aged village/kingdom type of place. "I really want to kill something. Like, if I don't get my hands bloody with some human, alien, angel, demon, or god meat, I'm going to go fucking crazy! I will lose my shit, man!" Chris said. "You're going to go crazy? You're a small bit too late for that, Dude." Henry said. "You know it's times like these I would be screaming things like "fuck you" or something but the only thing that's stopping me from doing that, is the fact you're not wrong about me being late. Cuz, I'm clinically insane." Chris said. Chris stomped onto the ground and right next to his foot came a sniper rifle. Chris held gun to his face, aimed his gun for only a split second, then 360 no scopes the first person he saw. Which was a tall women in a wrapped trench coat that was just walking around minding her own business. The bullet went straight into the woman's forehead. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Henry, did you see that?!" Chris said with the loud excitement of a child after doing something his parents would be proud of. "Yes, I saw that." Henry said. The gunshot sound caught every one off guard. Chris kept laughing at the woman he thought he just killed. Henry reaches behind his back, pulled out a ninjatō and sliced Chris' head open right down the middle. "OW!" Chris said. Henry turned around. Chris flipped Henry off while he wasn't looking. The woman that Chris shot turned around and saw Chris and Henry. She turned to walk away into an ally. It was at this point that Henry and Chris noticed that every one of the Civilians around them were female. All of the ladies around them pulled out swords and shields. "Aww shit." Chris said. "Damn you! You walking, talking, oxygen breathing, pig version of Patrick Star! Now look what you got us into! Because of you now we gotta kill all these people!" Henry said. "Sounds fun! Which one do we start with?" Chris said. "You shall start and end with me!" A female voice called. Henry and Chris turned to their right seeing a tall gargantuan amazon woman with glowing bracelets, a tiara, tall red and white boots, red, gold and blue leotard with star spangled panties. And a cool looking yellow rope on her right hip. "What the fuck?" Henry said. "Is that Wonder Woman?" Chris asked. "Nah that can't be! She an amazon lady so she gotta be tall as hell. She don't look like all that!" Henry said. "You two! No man can enter Themyscira unannounced." Diana said. "Please stand down ma'am my....didn't mean any harm when he....okay yea he meant a lot of harm but on his behalf I'm sorry for causing you trouble." Henry said. "WHO WANTS TO FIGHT ME!!" Chris said as he threw his hand out from his sides and started spinning around looking at all the fighters that had weapons trained on them. "YOU WANNA SQUARE UP, BITCH!? COME ON THEN, ILL DRAG YO STUPID ASS!" Chris said. The woman that surrounded the two were about to charge in. "SHUT UP!" Henry said. "Stand down sisters! I shall handle these two on my own!" Diana said. "Stand down ma'am! I'm not sexist and I mean this in the most respectful way possible, but these things like this rarely work out in the favor of people like yourself!" Henry said. "Oh? I don't think you've ever met a woman like me." Wonder Woman asked. "Yes we have! You're not impressive! You think that you're special!? HAHAHAHA!! You're a weird fellow! Shut yo eccentric ass up!" Chris said as he then ripped off his clothes and skin to reveal his super villain uniform underneath and grabbed his M60. Henry reaches behind his back once more and pulled out an LMG. With out another word spoken between the guys, Wonder Woman flew in at both Henry and Chris. Chris started unloading the clips into Wonder Woman with each bullet being deflected. Wonder Woman flew in and drop kicked Chris in his chest into a backflip, Knocking Chris back a few yards. Henry started blasting at Wonder Woman until he ran out of ammo. Wonder Woman blocked all the bullets and then threw her shield at Henry. Henry jumped over the shield and it ricocheted off the ground. Henry chucked the gun at her and immediately started running at her. Wonder woman let the gun hit her. Henry jumped and tried to pound her into the dirt but Wonder Woman grabbed Henry's fist and throat and threw him into the dirt. Wonder Woman stood tall above Henry. Henry reached behind him again and pulled out two Glocks, pointing them at her. Wonder Woman instinctively crossed her arms. Henry smiles as he wanted that to happen. Henry combat rolled away and Wonder Woman was "I like your cut, G'ed" by Chris swinging his hammer into the back of Diana's dome piece. Chris' hammer landed into the ground only to be swung back around coming upwards into the side of Wonder Woman's face. Chris stomped an uzi out from the ground and was about to shoot Diana. Diana recovered from Chris' previous attack, backhanded the gun out of his hands, grabbed his wrist and swung him around into the dirt. Chris let go of his hammer as he hit the ground. Wonder Woman picked him up by both his wrists and head butted the freak out of him. Chris winded his head back and head butted Wonder Woman with the same amount of force. Wonder Woman began hovering above the ground and head butted Chris so hard his head was knocked off his shoulders. Chris's head went flying and rolling across the ground. Chris was feeling an amount of rage so strong, it's almost impossible to describe. "You stupid bitch! You can't kill Mage! MAGE KI-KI-KI-KI-KILLS YOU!!!" Chris shouted. Wonder Woman tried to push kick Chris's body away but it backhand springed into a massive backflip landing right next to its head. Chris reattached his head to his body. As he was doing that, Henry and Wonder Woman were having a full blown sword battle. Wonder Woman crouch swiped her sword at Henry's foot. Henry lifted his foot up and came down with his own sword with an overhead swing. Wonder Woman blocked his sword with her own but was booted in her face a few yards away. Wonder Woman recovered. Both her and Henry ran into each other. Wonder Woman coming in with an overhead swing and Henry with underhand. They both slid past each other but came right back in again both of them twirling and swaying their swords before coming in with their strikes. Henry and Diana matched each other blow for blow. Diana double kicked Henry and knocked him off his balance. Diana rushed in landing a long clean swipe into Henry's chest meat. Rushed back again and sliced open his back meat. Then came back in once more and punched Henry a few miles away. As Henry and Diana were popping off, Chris was slaughtering the other amazon warriors. As Henry was flying away, Chris was running in at full speed underneath him. "CHRIS!" Henry called. Chris looked up seeing Henry flying over head of him. "TAG ME IN!" Chris said reaching out his hand to the sky. Henry reached out his own hand and the both of them high-fived. Chris pulled out his M60 and started unloading again. Henry, still flying, reached out inky tendrils from his back that wrapped and latched around stone pillars. Henry bungeed himself back to the ground. All of the other amazon women from before all started ganging up on him. Henry pulled out two Assault SMGs as his tendril formed other types of machine guns from their ink. "Hey people! You want to hear a joke?! YOU!!" Henry said. Chris from his fight with Wonder Woman began laughing in hysterics at the joke Henry made. "YOURE STILL A FUCK FACED LOSER BUT FOR WHAT ITS WORTH, THAT WAS FUNNY AS HELL, DAWG!!!" Chris said. All at once Henry started unloading everything as well as taking some of the ink to shoot out spikes and swords in all directions. It was honestly a massacre. Chris jumped into the air and came down attempting to hit Diana's, but instead swinging his hammer into the ground. Wonder Woman dragged two swords from his bracelets and chucked them into the ground, through Chris's feet, nailing him to the ground. Diana came in and clanged her bracelets together, right in front of his face. The shockwave wiped out the whole area they were in. Diana uncovered her face to see, to her horror that Chris was standing his ground just fine, not a single scratch on him. "What's the matter, wonder stripper? Can't face the clown?" Chris said letting out a maniacal cackle. Chris pulled the swords out from his feet and started spinning like a Beyblade, holding out the swords from his sides. With every spin and slash, Wonder Woman would block being pushed back but by bit with every counter. Chris spin kicked Diana in her chest, knocking her flat on her back. Diana popped back up only to be met with her swords flying at her, because Chris chucked them at her. Wonder Woman was barley able to evade the first one, sustaining a large gash on the side of her arm, and barley able to catch her second sword. "BETTER SCRAMBLE LIKE AN EGG 'FORE YOU GET FOLDED LIKE AN OMELETTE, SLUT FACE!!" Chris said as he then started charging up his plasma scream to full base power. "PLASMA SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chris shouted at the top of his lungs. A gigantic beam of red hell magic blasted across the field and right into Wonder woman's face at almost light speed. Wonder Woman clanged her bracelets together again in hopes of cancelling the attack. The shockwave and the plasma scream both collided with each other, one beginning to overpower the other and then the other looks like it's winning. The shockwave was just enough to overpower Chris in the end. A mega explosion happened right in Chris's face. A large mushroom cloud of smoke rising into the clouds. Diana again uncrossed her arms. Suddenly the wall of smoke dispersed revealing Chris once more shining the fierce fiery aura of second form. "Go suck a fat one, bitch!" Chris said as chucked his hammer at Diana with nearly all his strength. Chris let out a loud powerful cry as he began to go into his second form. Wonder Woman drew her sword and deflected the hammer over the mountain over yonder. Chris called his hammer back to his hand and it started making its way back. "Such reckless abandon! Poor misguided fool." Wonder Woman said as she was then smacked at the back of her head again. "HAAAAHG!" Wonder Woman exclaimed. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Look at you! Bonked on ya head like game of fucking whack-a-mole!" Chris said. Wonder Woman fell face first onto the floor. Chris came in rushing at her. Chris was half way over to her when he was suddenly nose checked in his skull by an unseen force. The force was so strong that it knocked Chris back hundreds of miles in seconds through all kinds of land forms and masses. Back with Henry he started taking out trash and going to work. He wasn't worried for Chris at all. The other amazon warriors were seeing all of that take place and we're paralyzed with shock. "Don't get distracted! I'm the person you need to worry about! You all are fighting me now and don't you forget it!" Henry said. All the other people snapped out of it and started jumping Henry. Henry ran in blasting everyone. One by one like rapid fire, one person would try their luck with Henry. And they were ganging fast. A bunch of them started dog piling on him. "Very unwise of you to all try your luck at once! Ill have to teach you a lesson in combat!" Henry said. The tendrils on Henry's began spinning like helicopter blades. Wiping out everyone that was on top of him, as well as the surrounding crowd of amazon fighters. Henry stood back up straight, seeing all of the unconscious but mostly dead bodies. "Disappointed!" Henry tells. In the distance Henry heard an explosion. "Oh right, Chris." Henry said. Chris then started spinning his tentacles and started flying to where Chris was.