You can, you should, and if you're brave enough, you will.
That is your motto as you navigate the K-pop industry as the first female Caribbean-Korean Idol.
The nerves in my stomach start up again as I pull up to the set of MCountdown. The first episode of me and Kevin being MCs, and the prep starts now.
As soon as I walk in, Kevin almost knocks me over as he runs up to me and gives me a hug.
"How you feeling?" He asks, leading me to the practise room. "Nervous as fuck." "We'll be fine," He laughs.
***
After two hours of rehearsing, the two of us head to the dressing room to get ready. Suddenly, the director approaches.
"Hi guys," He smiles, bowing to us. We bow back. "After watching the rehearsals, I'm thinking it would be better if you guys went off-script, if that's okay with you."
We breath a huge sigh of relief – we've both been trying to sound comfortable with the script, but no matter what we do, it never sounds natural.
"That would be brilliant," Kevin smiles. I nod. "Perfect," The director grins. "Make sure you know which groups are coming on – we'll write you some cue cards so there's a basic structure, but you can just improvise from there."
The two of us nod and he heads off.
Here goes nothing.
***
Kevin and I stand on the stage nervously awaiting our cue. The director gives us the signal, and after one last reassuring hug from Kevin, the cameras start rolling.
"Hello!" The two of us grin. "I'm PNations first soloist, ZeeZee." "And I'm the Boyz's Kevin." "And we are proud to welcome you to... MCOUNTDOWN!"
And the cameras cut to the opening credits.
"You good?" Kevin asks, hurrying to put his headset on and get into position. I nod, doing the same. It's fine, I reassure myself. It's fine. The director gives me the signal once again, and we start the opening performance.
And it cuts to the ads.
Kevin gives me another reassuring hug. "You're shaking – what's up?" "I'm just nervous," I smile, hugging him back. "You're going great – it'll be just like hanging out, okay?"
I nod and we take our handheld mics and cue cards from the crew before receiving the signal and the cameras start to roll.
"Hello!" The two of us cheer. "This is MCountdown and we have an unbelievable line-up for you today," Kevin begins. "With names as big as Gfriend, Seventeen and Dreamcatcher," "And two groups fresh off their debut, this episode promises to be brilliant!" "So," I smile. "Without further ado, we'd like to introduce Gfriend performing their latest song, Sunrise!"
The cameras click off and I breathe a huge sigh of relief.
"See," Kevin smiles. "I told you it'd be fine."
The cameras start rolling again.
"Wow," I smile. "That was-" Gfriend walks into the MC station, "That was amazing! The choreography in the beginning, just... wow." "Aw, thank you so much," Sowon smiles as they arrange themselves in front of the camera. "And can I just say, your outfits-" "May we introduce ourselves," SinB laughs.
Kevin and I blush and burst out laughing.
"Sorry," I joke. "It's our first day." We all laugh, including the camera crew. "Go ahead," Kevin laughs, burying his head in my shoulder in embarrassment. "Hello! We are Gfriend and you just watched our new song, Sunrise!" "Has he recovered?" Eunha asks. I laugh. "Yes, I'm fine," Kevin blushes. "Would you like to explain what your song Sunrise is about?" "Sunrise is about new beginnings," Yuju begins. "No matter how dark yesterday was, the sun will always bring you a new day and new opportunities." "Beautiful," Kevin and I say in unison and the camera pans over to the two of us.
"We would now like to welcome to the stage the new unit of NCT, WayV, to perform their new song Regular, the Chinese version."
And the cameras turn off.
"I'm so sorry," Kevin gushes, rushing over to the members of Gfriend. "It's no problem," SinB laughs. "It was quite cute actually." "Thank you," He laughs. "But can I just say," SinB continues. "ZeeZee, it's really nice to meet you." I look at her in surprise. "Really?" "Yes, of course! Meow is my favourite song right now." "Oh, th-thank you so much!" I smile. "Is it too forward to ask for a hug – I'm a big fan." "Of course," She smiles, giving me a tight hug. Kevin looks at the two of us in shock – and a hint of comic jealousy. "I was actually hoping to get a photo with you, if that's okay." "That'd be amazing!" I smile, pulling out my phone. "Kevin, would you-" "O-of course," He smiles, taking your phone.
YOU'RE YEJI
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"Bye!" We say as they walk off. "Yah! I'm so jealous," Kevin laughs. I give him a one-armed hug. "I can't help being famous," I joke, with a flick of my hair.
The director signals to us and the nerves hit me once again – I'm a massive Nctzen, and WayV is probably my favourite unit. Kevin notices and gives me a playful nudge.
WayV walks in.
"Hello!" Kevin cheers. "Before I make the same mistake twice, would you care to introduce yourselves?" "Hello! We are NCT's newest unit, WayV!"
I can feel my hands shaking.
"So, h-how w-was it." I laugh at myself, hearing my shaking voice. "I'm sorry, I'm so nervous." I look to Kevin for help when Ten cuts in. "Me too," He smiles. "It's my first time performing in ages." Kevin gives me a reassuring nod and I start again. "How did you find the process of making Regular your own?" "I think we struggled at first," Kun begins. "But the more familiar we were the song, the easier it got." Kevin and I nod.
"ZeeZee," Xiaojun begins. "I head you're a big fan of NCT. Do you think we did the song justice?" "I think it's brilliant," I smile. "When I heard your debut song would be a remake of Regular, I was a little worried because the original was already very impressive, but as soon as I heard it all my worries were gone." "And one final question," Kevin cuts in. "Lucas, where did you get the suit, 'cause I want it."
We all burst out laughing and the cameras cut to the ads. As they go to leave, I catch Ten.
"Thanks for saving me back there," I smile, giving him a bow. "Ah, it's no problem – and it's true. I was seriously nervous about meeting you – Big fan." "Seriously? I'm a huge fan of you too," I gush. "I loved Baby Don't Stop, and you were amazing in 7th Sense." He smiles but Kun calls his name. "Catch you later?" "O-of course."
I walk back to Kevin, a grin plastered across my face.
"I feel outshined," He mutters, and the two of us laugh.
