Comedic Mastermind

Chapter 15: Deceitful Confession

(Cheesy's POV)

"Welp, they're gone," I chuckle to myself. "Arrivederci," I whisper. I have to keep on with my act. I need to act panicked. I run to Hotel OJ and collapse onto the ground of the pathway. I look up and see Paper holding a clipboard. "CHEESY?!" he shouts. I wave nervously. He smiles worriedly. "Come in! Nice we finally found you! Sorry if I don't sound that happy, it's just so out of nowhere," he smiles nervously. "Come in," he points in front of him. I follow him in.

"We should notify OJ about this!" Paper looks at me. I nod. We walk to where I suppose is an office. "Hey, OJ!!" Paper calls out. OJ looks startled. "O-Oh! Greetings, Paper! And-... CHEESY?!" he shouts. "Oh my gosh! You're here!!" he shouts again. I smile awkwardly. "Yeah... Hi!" I try to act cheerful. OJ chuckles nervously. "Your merriness is disappearing. Something wrong? Not to pry in..." OJ asks me. "It's just what happened while I was missing," I reply, looking around myself. "What happened?" OJ asked. I look around nervously. "Don't worry. No one will be hearing about this except for us," Paper tries to console me. "Welllll... Unless it's information that might be linked to the others' disappearances," OJ looks at Paper. "Right... But don't be afraid, Cheesy!" Paper looks at OJ and then at me continuously. I felt like Paper was going to slaughter me or something.

I stood there for what felt like an eternity. "Cheesy?" Paper questions. "O-Oh! Yeah... Sorry! Just lost in thought!" *Knee slap* "Sorry," I say. Paper chuckles a bit. "Is this your way of coping with trauma?" OJ asks. "Yeah, yeah. Sorry..." I apologize. "Ah, no. It's fine. A-Anyways! Back on topic. Cheesy, in the duration of time you went missing, what happened?" OJ asks again. Before I can answer, I think to myself. You know, they're probably dead. But I can have an alibi if they're alive and lose their memory! Imagine them vouching for me. That'd be hilarious! Making robot versions of them, and making them believe... Ha! I need to come up with a story, though. And remember it too.

"Well?" Paper says, impatiently. "Well," I start. "I was trapped in this cave thingy with Mic, Cherries, and Trophy! Mic was super glitchy, the Cherries were separated, and Trophy was missing his left eye. I lost a little bit o' cheese, but it somehow regenerated. I don't know who our captor was, but this one was really smart. I haven't seen a face, silhouette, or even heard a voice! They must've set it up earlier, all for it to set into the plan," I answer. Paper writes on his clipboard and OJ looks at Paper.

"Do you know how they got those injuries?" OJ questions. "Yeah!" I answer. "We all discussed what happened." OJ looks at his desk. "Well? Go on," Paper nudges me. "Right... So, Mic stepped on a button. Water splashed onto her and a bucket fell right after. All of that was on her head," I reply. Paper scribbles on the paper. He then starts writing again. "With Cherries, something similar happened to them. They stepped on a button and were split apart by a sharp and flat metal object," I continued. Paper focuses even more on writing. Then he taps his pencil on the paper, waiting for me to resume narrating. "With Trophy, he steps on a button as well. A huge hammer descends and hits his left eye, causing the piece of gold to break off and fall behind him. He said he felt a powerful force hit the back of his head. He was then in this room, where the captor was. He says it was too dark to see any silhouette, but he thought there was a light switch somewhere," I say. Paper stops writing and looks at me. "How about you?" he asks. "I stepped on a button. There was a similarly sharp and flat metal object that comes swooping down and takes like 45% of my cheese!" I bury my face in my hands. "Ah, I'm sorry for all of you!" OJ exclaims. Paper takes a sticky note, writes on it, and sticks it onto the clipboard. "It's fine, really," I respond. "At least I got my cheese back. As for them..." OJ cracks a smile but still looks sad.

"Okay. I got the notes down," Paper says. "Great!" OJ replies. "Hey, Cheesy?" Paper starts. "If you were with the others and you're here now... What happened to them?" I pause for a moment. "Oh! That reminds me! I did see Fan and Soap..! In the cave..." I reply. "Wait, really?! Did they help get you out of the cave?" OJ asks. "Yeah! But uhh..." I act sad. "They lifted me out of the cave, but none of the rest could make it. The roof of the cave collapsed and they all..." I look down. Paper gives me a sympathetic pat on the back. "I'm sorry about all of that..." OJ replies. "Let's throw a party for your return, yeah?" OJ smiles. I jump up in excitement. "Yeah!!" I shout. Paper grabs my hand. He nods reassuringly and walks me out to the canteen.