If Forever Falls Apart| eren j.

38

Eren

I fucking hate this idea.

I told her not to go far, but when does she ever listen to me? Her constant stubbornness is one of the many things I admire about her, but at the same time I can't stand it.

My rib hurts like hell and every single one of my movements come with pain. I don't think they're broken though, but hell i'm no doctor. My head is pounding with excruciating pain and fuck. I almost can't bear it.

But the pain helps. It makes me not want to stop. Forces my body not to give out on itself. It keeps me awake and when it hurts so bad, A rush of adrenaline runs through my body like the steady flow of a harsh current in water. It's powerful enough to kill or get you exactly where you want to be and thankfully for me it's the latter.

We had a plan–more like (Y/N) had a plan and I had no choice, but to go along with it. It was simple: Get a car and get the fuck out of here.

But no, it's never that fucking simple.

All these fucking cars and not one can be driven. I tried to be positive, but it was either bullet holes that were ebbed into the wheels or no keys... why not leave the keys in the ignition when you raid a fucking place?? Fucking hell.

"Fuck me." I groan about my lack of stamina.

These cuts and bruises are catching up to me. And I pray the constant adrenaline rush I get keeps up for a couple hours.

Who raided them? Is a question I keep asking. Zeke? No he wouldn't have gotten people here that fast.

My dad? That could be it. The car wash was only an hour from when we crashed. It could be them. But fuck, I'm in no shape to go and find out. I wouldn't be able to protect her...not like this.

"Eren! There you are." I turn around at the familiar voice. "We've been looking for you both." Yelena comes closer to me, sweat covers her forehead causing her hair to stick to it. Jesus fucking Christ I've never been more excited to see her in my life. And it's saying a lot when not only hours ago I wanted to fucking strangle her with my bare hands.

"Fuck, Yelena." I'm dumbfounded, lost for words, everything in the fucking book.

"Jesus, what did they do to you?" her eyes raked my body, I knew I looked bad, but I didn't know it was that bad. Blood matted in my hair, my ponytail holder gave up on itself hours ago. My body bends over in fatigue. Yelena was quick to catch me. "Come on, let's get you in a car?"

"I can't leave her." I say before removing myself from her. I had to find (Y/N) there was no way in hell I'd be stepping a foot in a car if she's not stepping in there with me.

"We won't leave. I won't." I stared at her, there is no time for me to be jealous right now, but the way she said that made that possessiveness I hold for (Y/N) heighten by a mile.

"I won't either." I stood up high, ignoring the pain in my ribs when I did so.

"Eren, don't make this difficult. You're hurt, you can barely fucking move."

Our eyes locked, there was no way in hell I'd give up. Yeah I'm a hypocrite. I'm stubborn too. She continued to stare at me, probably calculated all the ways I can fuck this up, but that certain glint in her eyes told me something else.

"Fine." She scoffed, a smile pulled at the corner of my lips. I got her. "Come let me help you."

She walked up to me coming up to my side. I threw an arm around her shoulders. She gripped my waist making me groan in pain, "My ribs," I breathed out, hoping she understood. I really hope they weren't broken.

'Don't tell me you got broken ribs, man." She sighed before continuing, 'I told them not too hard." I don't know when I did it but when I did all I felt was anger. Rage, Hurt, Confusion, I was fucking disgusted.

All I saw was red.

She was on the floor and my hands were wrapped tightly around her neck. I could feel the blood pumping through my veins, it hurt but maybe that was all the pain I was feeling by exerting my muscles. Betrayed, that's what I felt.

"YOU FUCKING TRAITOR!" I yelled in her face, She's going red, her nails scratching at my arms, but I don't stop. I can't stop. I don't want to. The only thing I want is her death. I grew up with her, she was always around. My brother fucking trusted her with his life. She's the reason we're in this mess.

Only those in that office knew we were on that road, she ratted us out. She's the reason we got into the crash, she's the reason (Y/N) is hurt... I'm going to be the reason she fucking dies. I look at her with nothing but hatred seeping through my eyes, but in the back of my head I keep those memories of her that flash through me like a picture film on a big screen. She struggles, but she doesn't give up.

I used to admire that about her. The fight she carried with her. The way she moved to the top of the Italian Familia without being Italian and the fact she's a woman. Although society did change, the Mafia is still old-fashioned. She's smart. I'll give her that. But there was one thing she failed to do.

To stay loyal.

The Cosa Nostra hates betrayal more than anything.They'll tie you up and string you from your feet as they slowly empty the traitorous blood from you. And I more than anything wish to do that to her right now.

She withers in pain, clawing her nails into my arms, but all I see is red. Nothing prepares me for what's to come next. The burning sensation hits me like a truck ramming into a tree. The fire travels to my spine and the warm liquid flows out of me like it's late for work. My eyes are blown with shock as I look down at her. A coy smile plays at her lips as she tries to pry off my hands that only seem to be tightening. She fucking stabbed me.

The knife handle sticking out of my stomach only proves the reasoning. Shit. I can feel myself getting weaker, a perfect chance for her to finish prying my hands from her neck. The sound of her coughing and gasping in amounts of air falls short to my ears as the pain still comes at me at full force. My back hits the ragged ground as I bring my hands up to the wound. The knife is still plunged deep inside me and I swear every breath pushes it deeper. The dark red blood stains my hands quickly, fuck this shit hurts.

I roll my head back until it meets the ground, "Fuck, I think I missed the artery" she laughs still choking, I should've went harder, "Don't worry tho, that a deep cut you'll bleed out quickly."

She appears over me, her eyes shining in triumph, her bloodied hand rakes through her hair and she smiles. That should be me, I should be the one over her dead body. Fucking hell. I can feel the blood draining from my body through the wound, I might not survive and all i'm thinking about is how (Y/N) would find out. I can't die, not until I know she'll be okay.

"I'll take that..." The searing hot pain of her removing the knife makes me wince, It hurts so fucking much.

"FUCK!" I yell, but it comes out broken. I can't fucking do this.

"Sleep tight you fucking piece of shit." She kicks my leg as she walks away. I want to get up and tackle and break her down. It's what I'm imagining right now, but I can't move my body.

It all fucking hurts.

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