Anonymous.

chapter three

Monday 9 November 2013,

Today was my first day of school after the death of my bestfriend.

It hurt knowing the fact that the people in your school would probably be happy while you, you even find breathing was too much for you.

My first class was Maths.
my Maths teacher was checking the homework and I was nervous because I did half of the homework because I seriously had no time.
on Friday and Saturday there was the funeral and after that i went immediately to bed.

on Sunday I was sitting doing nothing all day and thinking about him.

"Noor, why didn't you do the homework?!" she yelled at me, and I felt like crying.
Didn't she understand?
can't she just stop yelling at me for one day? just one day.

I felt like punching her but instead I remained calm and told her "I didn't fully do it because my bestfriend-" she stopped me telling me "I know"
but like, if you know why are you yelling?
doesn't she have feelings?
doesn't she just get tired of making me feel bad?
can't she just shut up for once, understanding what I'm going through?

I continued my day normally, tearing up every once in a while and it caught some people's attention and made them think that i was being "dramatic".

My bestfriend isn't in our school. Well wasn't in our school. so Them not knowing him made it okay for them to call me dramatic for crying.

Most of the day I was with my friends, silent, until Sasha my bestfriend told me a joke and I laughed without even noticing.
But that laugh faded when dani, my classmate came and told me "if you're sad about losing your 'loved one' why are you laughing".
I got mad.
I was starting to forget about it until a stupid guy came and reminded me of what situation I'm going through.
its like they think its stupid loosing your bestfriend.
i hate them.
And
i miss him.

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