Rising To The Surface

Chapter 37

"We walked along the beach together and he kept talking about what he'd been aiming to do and the waves. Honestly, I didn't have a clue what he was talking about most of the time, but I didn't care. He told me how grateful he was that I'd come and that he really liked me." I blushed. "And then, we both went to get ice cream, at a place nearby, with his mum and sister." I hadn't been able to convince Nick to go home, despite the multiple offers from Deb to drop me back later, but he agreed to stay in the car and wait, so I could enjoy the time without him hovering over me awkwardly.

"That is the cutest thing I've heard all year!" Gabby gushed, clapping and grinning.

"You've got more action with guys in the short time you've been here than us combined in our whole time in high school." Sighed Tate, although she was smiling.

"You two need to go somewhere else." When I turned to see who it was being so rude, my stomach twisted.

"Excuse me?" Tate glared.

"Scarlett." I turned to her, caution in my tone. My pulse was quickening.

"You won't leave? Fine." Scarlett spat. "You ruined everything." She turned to me, face like thunder. "You arrive; your parents have no time for anyone else. You take my seat in maths. You steal my boyfriend's attention. You made me fail my test and you got me suspended from track for a whole season. I'm going to be a professional runner, you know. Now, you've made it ten times harder." Her volume rose and so did my breathing rate. "My parents are angry. Jonah is angry. Jonah breaks up with me, the boy I love. All because of you. Poor little Ashlyn. Abused and ruined. I worked it out. The reason you flinch and the reason you have that stupid dog. And you keep it all some secret! Why don't you just parade around what shitty parents you have so everything gets even easier for you; it's not like it was already easy enough!" The rest of the cafeteria had gone silent, and all eyes were on Scarlett as she continued to yell. My vision was going blurry, and my chest was tight, but there was an interruption before I lost all my senses.

"Enough!" Ryan yelled, as multiple teacher-figures approached, and the room went silent. "Do not ever speak to my sister again." Ryan towered over Scarlett and was intimidating enough to make her back down.

"You don't love me, Scarlett." Jonah appeared. "You just liked being able to say you had a boyfriend."

Austin was there too, moving to slightly shield me from the eyes of the cafeteria, along with Tate and Gabby, and Teddy.

I wanted to vanish. To blackout. To be anywhere but here.

~

I'd had four panic attacks in the two hours I'd been trying to sleep for. Each time was the same; I'd wake up to Scarlett screaming, and then I'd remember what she said – abused and ruined, then see images of all kinds of things I never wanted to think about again, sending both my mind and my heart into overdrive. My door stayed open and every time I woke up to either Mum or Ryan next to me. I'd fall straight back asleep afterwards, because the moments of peace I got whilst in that deep, exhausted sleep were better than no panic attacks.

RYAN POV

"Why does this keep happening?" I was on the verge of yelling, feeling the most furious I ever had. The only thing keeping me from smashing something or reaching max volume was the fact I could see Ash sleeping from where I was standing. "Every time she starts getting better, and things are going well, then something or someone comes and ruins it all."

"Ryan, sit down, please." Mum pleaded, my pacing back and forth clearly bothering her.

"What's going on?" Nick stormed inside, having already had a call from me and presumably Austin or Jonah.

"She's asleep, don't wake her." Mum hushed him.

"Bloody hell." Nick ran his hands through his hair. If I wasn't so angry myself, I'd be way more attentive to what this was doing to Nick since he'd never shown this much care for any of us before. "Where's Dad?"

"I can't get hold of him. He's really busy at a conference all day."

"They're going to expel her, right?" I asked to no one in particular. I never wanted to see that girl's face again. Not only did she make a scene she also loudly revealed my baby sister's private, and serious, business to the entire cafeteria, which would have made it around school within 5 minutes of her being taken to the principal's office.

"That is not up to us." Mum sighed.

"It's such bullshit-"

"I know, Ryan. I know."

"What else has been going on that we don't know about?" Nick asked, completely impassive. He made a good point.

"There's been a fair bit of conflict. It makes sense now that Ash and Jonah steer clear of each other. She was the one who swapped her maths tests."

"Even more of a reason they should throw her out." I scoffed.

"Ryan, we should be feeling sorry for her. She must be having a hard time if this is what she's blaming her issues on." Mum tried to sound convincing but failed.

"I'm not feeling sorry for anyone except my baby sister. She's the one struggling here. Scarlett can get her shit together." I argued.

"I don't know what to do. She was doing well, and the panic attacks were so rare, but now, when they are set off, they are full-blown to the point where she can't do anything but sleep because her body is too exhausted." Mum looked over to where Ash was beginning to stir. Her phone rang, and she excused herself to answer. Nick and I were left alone.

"She told me. What it was like before she moved here." I admitted, sitting on the couch, and putting my head in my hands.

"She'll tell the rest of us when she's ready. It shows she trusts you."

"I had to stop her." I shook my head. "I couldn't listen to it." I was ashamed. My baby sister was carrying more baggage and trauma than the majority of people experience in their lifetime, yet I couldn't even listen to her talk about it and offload some of it. What kind of brother did that make me?

"Ash, why are you out of bed?" Nick asked. She appeared right next to me, hair dishevelled and eyes puffy, then sat in my lap and curled up in my arms. I held her tight, stroking her hair, and within minutes she was back in a deep sleep.