what's gone never disappears 【hololive】

Ch. 1

"Rii-chan~ Anemachi and I are going out. Will you be okay by yourself?" My sister Suisei's voice is muffled through the door.

"I'll be fine. Have fun."

"Okay. See you later, Rii-chan. Please be responsible."

She's only two years older than me, but she protects me like a hawk. Especially after my favorite streamer, someone that Suisei got to see personally every single day, was terminated from Hololive. Uruha Rushia. I never met her personally, but Suisei always told Rushia stories about my slight obsession with that necromancer. The last time she ever entered the Hololive streaming offices, Rushia even gave Suisei her polar bear hoodie to give to me. But every time they had any sort of off collab or time where I would have a chance to interact with Rushia, I'd be too nervous to ask Suisei if it was okay to interrupt her time with friends.

The reason why no one knows of me is because at the start of Suisei's career, Anemachi made a point to not let me appear on stream or anywhere on the internet. I was only 12 at the time that she started streaming as a vtuber, and now that I can somewhat make decisions for myself I've decided to continue staying away from the public eye. I've met A-chan and a bunch of Suisei's vtuber friends, but none of them are allowed to talk about me on stream.

Since Rushia was terminated, all I do is sit in my room all day. Every once in a while, one of my sisters will come in and play card games with me or beat me at Mario Kart. I think they would do it more if they realized how much I actually like it. Sometimes I go on a walk outside the apartment building, petting stray animals and getting gifts for my sisters from the local shops. Before Rushia's termination, I was still a very shy person and I kept to myself. Losing Rushia just made me even more reserved.

"Rii-chan, we're home. Do you need anything?" I hear Anemachi call from the other side of the house. "Dinner will be ready in 30. Come eat with us tonight, yeah?"

Rather than yelling and straining my voice, I LINE message the group of me, Suisei, and Anemachi. "thank you, onee-chan. I don't need anything, and I will consider eating together."

"Maybe I should go on a walk..." I whisper to myself. I open the door from my bedroom to the short hallway in our apartment.

Suisei looks up from her video game for half a second, her eyes widening at the sight of me. "Well, if it isn't Rii-chan." She flashes me a smile before turning back to the game. I wave at her as I pass by, soon slipping out the door of our apartment.

Entering the elevator, I notice an orange-haired dragon and a much shorter angel already in the elevator.

"Rii-chan! It's so nice to see you!" Coco says, Kanata smiling as both of them wave in my direction.

"Kanatan, Coco-san! It's been a while, hasn't it?"

Kanata looks up at Coco, the two sharing a look as if they're having a nonverbal conversation. Kanata looks back towards me, the elevator slowing down as we reach the ground floor of the building. "I have a collab with Sui-chan soon. After the stream, come hang out with us!" Both girls wave at me as they walk out of the elevator. I follow, although once out of the elevator I turn a different direction than them.

I shiver once the cold outside air hits my skin. Once again, I was stupid enough to not bring a jacket outside, only wearing Rushia's hoodie. Sighing, I walk to the side of the building where the stray cats spend their time. On the side of the building are the same cats as usual, I make sure to greet each of them every time I go outside. There's only one cat I've never met, a small brown cat, its coat color almost pink. In its mouth is a stuffed animal almost as big as the cat itself. The stuffed animal looks to be handmade, messy stitches connecting its button eyes to a few different colors of fabric. As I reach down to let the cat sniff my hand, it drops the stuffed animal on the ground, prioritizing nuzzling my hand with its face.

"You're cute, aren't you?" I whisper towards the cat. The cat meows in response, causing me to lightly laugh. It's as if the cat knows what I'm saying. Somehow, this cat feels different from the other cats. It feels as though I have more of a connection to it. After a minute, I stand up, no matter how sad I might be to leave this cat. The cat looks at me with confusion, picking up the stuffed animal with its mouth again. I pat its head one last time, slowly walking toward the other side of the building.

The cat, predictably, follows me, but once I reach the front of the building I bend down in front of the small animal.

"I can't take you home with me.. Neko-chan. I would love to have a cat, although I don't know about my sisters... but I like you, so I'll try to come back tomorrow. Okay?"

As I expected, the cat's ears fall back and the cat bows its head. I ruffle its fluffy fur before walking back into the apartment building.

"Sui-chan, Rii-chan. Dinner's ready. Come eat," Anemachi calls from the kitchen. I emerge from the depths of my bedroom and sit down at the table with my sisters.

"Itadakimasu," we say in unison.

After a few seconds of silence, I finally decide to speak. "S-so.. I found a cat today," I pause, taking a bite of what is certainly some of Anemachi's best cooking. "And the cat really likes me, better than the rest of the cats, and I don't know how to feel about it."

"We're not getting a-"

Suisei cuts Anemachi off. "How about you take us to go see the cat after dinner? Stop being so harsh, Onee-chan." Suisei shoots Anemachi a look before smiling in my direction.

"Okay, I'll take you. The cat was actually carrying, like, a stuffed animal, and it seems really attached to it."

(After dinner)

"What did you do with my good shoes, Onee-chan?" Suisei calls from across the apartment, looking for whatever shoes Anemachi must have taken the last time she went out.

"Sui-chan. They're right here," I point to a pair of sneakers usually worn by Suisei when we go outside for a short amount of time.

"Thanks, Rii. I found them, Onee-chan, nevermind," my older sister projects the second half of her statement long enough for Anemachi to hear, hopefully.

"Alright, let's go," Anemachi smiles as she approaches where Suisei and I stand by the door.

Chapter 2 out soon, I'm so tired I can't keep writing lol
I did not proofread this before posting haha