branded (phantoms mc #2)

thirty: in which she drops all pretense

"I've become good at hiding and playing pretend" –Vorsa, runaway

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"Four letters. A word that means uncontrollable," said Dana, to no one in particular.

"Four?" Cam asked. "You sure?"

"Third letter is 'l', if that helps."

"Wild," I muttered, focusing very intently on my murky cup of coffee.

I heard Dana place the newspaper down. "You're right! And...I'm done."

"You finished another crossword?" Eva sounded impressed.

"What's a crossword?" Leo wanted to know.

Yeah. I can't do this, I thought, getting to my feet.

I trudged out of the kitchen and went out onto the patio. The house was too suffocating, but so was this weird attempt at playing happy fucking families. We were pretending that my jailbird mother didn't have a bottle of meds that Camila dispensed to her every morning. We were pretending that Eve wasn't knocked up by her dead, abusive boyfriend. We were pretending that Camila wasn't still scared of her own shadow, on her bad days, at least. And now...well, now I was pretending that I hadn't fucked everything up for everyone.

"I know this is hard for you, Cat."

I turned towards the voice to see Camila standing in the doorway, wrapping her shawl around her shoulders before stepping outside.

"I just needed some air," I told her. It was the truth.

"Right," she said, her voice soft. "She's doing good. though, isn't she?"

By "good", Cam probably meant that Dana hadn't had an episode. Just because it hadn't happened yet, didn't mean that it wouldn't. Or couldn't. Fluphenazine wasn't a magical cure.

"Okay," Cam said after a moment of silence passed between us. "What's up with you?"

Other than the fact that Crow wants me to return you to him like he's a lost-and-found bin? Nothing.

I scrubbed a hand down my face. "Probably that time of the month."

Cam huffed out an audible breath. "Liar. We've synced."

I rolled my eyes at that. "That was one time, Camila."

"Liar."

I didn't say anything to her. Instead, I watched the driveway in anticipation. Of what? I didn't know. Maybe Crow and the rest of the Cursed riding up here to make good on his threats. But there was absolutely no way he could know where we were. Then again, I'd never expected him to clock me after only one meeting.

"I've been thinking," Camila said, slicing into the silence that stretched between us. "Maybe I could get a place? With Mama and Leo? Just for a while, until we figure out where we want to go."

Panic began to creep up, making my pulse erratic. "Move out?"

"Yeah. I mean, I know I don't have the money –"

"That...that's not it, Cam. You know I'll gladly give you half the money from the trust that Dad left me," I blurted out, realizing too late that I was giving her options. But our father had thought she was dead, so everything had been left to me. Half of it was rightfully hers, and I couldn't keep withholding it from her in a bid to keep her with me.

I took a deep breath, my mind racing. "I think Dana still needs a bigger support system. What happens when you have to leave the house for therapy? Who stays home with her?" I was grasping at straws here, but what else could I do? "And what if she has a breakdown and gets violent? How will you deal with that alone? With Leo?"