Beyond The Fangs

Chapter 28

JAEGER

Death hadn't claimed me in the water, but it had been very close to doing so. Something snatched me from its grasp. Someone snatched me from its grasp.

Somehow, oxygen found its way to my lungs and I coughed out the water I had taken in. My senses slowly started to come back to me and I realised that I was no longer in the water. I was on the ground, but that was as much as I knew. I still didn't have enough energy to move, but I was conscious now, and fully aware of the fact that Izzy was stripping me, blabbering on about what she was doing and why.

I didn't pay much attention to her words, but as soon as her body made contact with mine a shudder ran through me. The cold slowly became a distant memory as Izzy's body heat merged with mine.

"First mouth-to-mouth, and now this?" I heard her say to herself. "Wow Izel, you really are something."

My pulse faltered. That was how oxygen found its way to my lungs, it was from Izel. She had given me mouth-to-mouth. A sudden warmth formed around my mouth, as if, even though I didn't remember her lips on mine, my lips did. 

So she was the one who snatched me out of death's grasp. But that made no sense because after reaching consciousness, I heard her say she would try to kill me for trying to kill her. Did that mean that she saved me despite thinking that I tried to kill her?

 It made sense why she thought that though, I did throw her off a cliff after all. But I had jumped in after her, and I had no idea why I did that.

The Quearus had been determined to kill Izzy, and because of my injuries, it kept managing to knock me down before speeding for her. It was difficult enough to keep the Quearus back, and I knew it was going to be a lot more of a challenge to kill it. I knew that if the Quearus got one good hit on me, Izzy would be a goner, so all I focused on was getting her out of there, and that thought consumed my mind.

I had become solely concerned about Izzy's wellbeing, not mine. I had stopped focusing on killing the Quearus, had stopped focusing on cutting Izzy loose. All I could think about was getting her out of there, and the river was the only way.

I had heard the water running but I knew that Izzy wouldn't trust me enough to jump as soon as I told her to, and that hesitation would have cost her, so I threw her in. It wasn't even satisfying, throwing her over, but after I threw her I found myself falling after her.

I hadn't been sane. It was as if my brain turned off and when it turned on again, I was falling with her in my arms and my back to the water. I wasn't a full vampire, so a fall like that could have killed me just like it would a human. So I had just risked my life for hers...

Why?

Why had I wanted to protect her? Why had I wanted to make sure she didn't get hurt? Why had I wanted to make sure she remained alive? Why had I felt like that?

And why didn't I mind having her close to me like this, our bodies pressed up against each other? 

I wasn't a fan of contact, but I didn't mind this. I didn't mind feeling her bare skin against mine, I didn't mind feeling her chest rise and fall with every breath she took and I didn't mind feeling her breath against my skin. I felt something lurch in my stomach when I realised that I actually liked the contact.

I didn't mind it because I didn't mind her. The longer I was with her, the less alone I felt. She made me laugh, made me smile even when I didn't want to. She annoyed me in amusing ways. She challenged me in different ways. She had a power over me that I couldn't fight that I literally jumped off of a cliff for her.

For the girl I had been battling with since we met. The girl whose goal, for the longest time, was to kill me. The girl who was planning to kill me once she woke up. That girl made me feel alive.

And that girl, I realised, was the one person in this world I could tolerate. The one person I cared about.

My stomach lurched even further when that realisation hit me.

Had I developed feelings other than hate for Izzy? Was I attracted to her?

No, that was impossible, there was nothing to be attracted to.

And yet, I had jumped off a cliff to save her life.

My arms suddenly wrapped tighter around her, pulling her closer before I even registered what I was doing.

What was I doing?

My body was doing a lot of things without my authority recently. First, I jumped off a cliff, then I breathed in water, and now this. 

I couldn't help but think it was because my body knew what I wanted but I just couldn't accept it. 

I jumped in for Izzy because I wanted to save her but just couldn't accept it. I breathed in water because I needed something, anything to fill my lungs even if it could have killed me. And now I wrapped my arms around her because I felt something for her, but just couldn't accept it.

I was going to be sick.

And yet I found myself yearning for more contact than this. 

She snuggled closer to me still, the movement sending more shivers through my body than the cold, and I couldn't help the several questions that swarmed my brain.

Was she that cold or was she feeling something too? Did she not mind being this close to me or was she just doing this to survive? Was I really the only one who felt like this?

No, that couldn't be. I couldn't be the only one who felt whatever it was I felt. These kinds of feelings would make me weak and vulnerable. 

I had to get over them. I had to ignore them. But I also had to know if Izzy felt anything close to what I did.