Fierce ❤️ [FlaCy Drabbles and Oneshots]

Inferior [oneshot]

ғɪᴇʀᴄᴇ

"ғɪᴠᴇ; ɪɴғᴇʀɪᴏʀ"

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Dear Flare,

I know already.

I know these letters aren't going anywhere.

I have experience.

Look at the ones I kept to my mom.

There's a special red box with a lock on top of it.

And those letters are to you, Flare.

Because I fucking love you, okay?

I love you.

I loved the way you always told me I was weird because I wrote those letters to my mom, and never sent them. I just kept them. You thought that was weird. I can't blame you, I mean Natsu and the others knew about this too but they didn't react the way you did, you were so fucking different and I guess I was attracted to that.

Whenever you point out my flaws and the way I do things when I try to do the same to you my throat gets all dry and I got tongue tied. That one day I was starting to get fed up how you always made fun of me because I couldn't find a flaw about you. One single flaw. Sure there's things here and there but they aren't... no, they weren't strong enough.

You were superior. I was inferior. I hated that. At the time, I hated you. A part of me had a attraction I couldn't control. I guess I could say I ended up falling in love with you or something by accident, right? It took me letters to realize this.

You frustrated me so much.

You used to be the inferior one then all of a sudden when you join Fairy Tail... the day you joined Fairy Tail... you changed.

It was for the better, to everyone else, not me.

But guess what? I still fell for you. How? Well, I've already ranted on above how it came to be. I hid my feelings with hatred for you. I was jealous.

Then that's when the day came. The day I snapped at you because of my one sided stupidity.

"Why?" I cried, "Why every time it comes to you I feel so weird, this isn't even about our flaws, this is about you! I can't take it anymore! I don't care what you think about me! All I care about being just right for you! I'm tired of being so inferior, you making my heart pound, making me loss of words, it makes me feel like I'm not good enough!"

You stared at me. I stared back at you. The wind howled that day and was full of cold breezes. We were outside, by that bridge, because that's where you saw me walking across. And greeted me, you didn't point out my flaws today. But I snapped at you. Seeing you made my stomach churn, twist, and do somersaults.

Then after I said all those stuff I regretted, you apologized.

"Sorry." You said. "Sorry... that you took all those things to the heart. I'm sorry that I've wronged you. Because I know that you hate me."

Your eyes. The look in your eyes, it wasn't like before. You had that tired look in your eyes as if you were done and over with everything. Something told me you meant that apology.

You did.

And I forgave you. But you never talked to be from then on. No flaws, playful remarks that made me scowl at you, none of that. You just did your own thing. I had to come up to you and talk to you. I actually had to be the one to talk to you first. I hated doing that, because I didn't want you to think I'm all of a sudden so needy and desperate. You make me have mixed feelings.

I told you I forgave you. All you did was give me a smile at first until you said that you were going on a mission, alone. And that you can't bare to keep coming to the guild any longer because you have to see me. And that even though I forgave you, you were the one feeling inferior to me the whole time. You also hid your feelings, wanted to tease me to feel superior yourself. It ended up getting to me.

For that, you said you didn't deserve to be my friend. Were we ever friends? Frienemies? What were we even? We were just guildmates. I'm thinking this now but then after you went on that solo mission, I was just dumbfounded.

When you never came back from that solo mission. I was still dumbfounded. Until I realized I wanted you to come back.

I wanted to tell you that you're an idiot and I'm the childish one who wasn't aware of your feelings in the first place, grab you and pull you in closer to me so I can just kiss you to shut you up. Even if you have nothing to say, so you can be silent after. I wanted you back. I wanted you to come from that solo mission and tell me that you are worthy and what you said you regretted.

You didn't.

All I can do now is tell you that you didn't on this letter, Flare, because you're not here to read it and poke fun at it. Wherever you are... I hope you know that I meant it when I said I forgive you. You always understood me. You were always there. You were always Flare. But those eyes.... those eyes I saw,

Made me feel inferior.

That's what I truly love about you. I can't blame your eyes, since that type of inferior you felt was misunderstood. And I'm sorry for making you feel that way. All I cared about was myself.

I'm about to end this letter. As I do, I'll say these last three words from the bottom of my heart. I'm writing this with confidence just laughing to myself thinking how your old self would make remarks, and the new you... would probably do the same... if you ever came back from that mission.

Life just isn't fair. And,

I love you, Flare.

Love, Lucy.