Unmasked

Chapter 26

-unedited-

Chapter 26:

I don't want to live in secrecy anymore. The words ring through my mind as I try to find peace at mind.

I don't know how I feel anymore; about this or anything else, I only know that I am afraid of what is to happen or might happen.

He doesn't deserve this. My hand ball into fists within my hair, my head begins to ace. But do I deserve this?

I look around the small room that I'm sleeping in and suddenly remember all the other rooms I've seen, the closet that was ten times bigger than mine.

I don't. A voice I don't recognize suddenly pops into my mind and after that everything goes blank.

No longer being able to think, I'm finally able to breathe and go to sleep.

~

When I dream I dream of gold and dancing, smiling and wandering; I'm dreaming of that night, that night when I met him. The Prince.

Gold.

I dream of gold.

~

It struck me that I haven't heard or seen Michael since the last time I sent a letter. Does he know that I was given away? Does he know where I am?

It also struck me that I haven't seen Harriet at all for a long time. Is she okay? Is working outside too hard for her? I she worried about me as well?

I hadn't realized that even if working for mother wasn't at all the brightest thing in my life, it was after all, my life and ever since I've been taken from there, what I'm used to is gone. My comfort, my family.

When I wake in the morning, I freshen up to go get ready. I'm about to head inside the kitchen, but I stop when I hear them speaking.

"He stared as she hurried away from him, its so obvious it hurts."

"At the end of every week she goes to clean his bedroom, I guess she want to clean up the evidence."

"She was supposed to come and help prepare for dinner when she got back from downtown the other day, but instead she quickly dropped them off and left!'

"As if she were to meet someone..."

"Last week she was alone with the prince in the hallway as well!'

And when I entered the kitchen at where we could eat, they all fell silent, their loud voices falling into hushed whispers. Both young and old maids are in and wanting to know who's sneaking around with the Prince.

"Told ya it wouldn't take long."

"Found one, now where's the rest?"

Laughter.

I feel my face growing warm, and not in the way when I'm with him. They all don't look at me, as if I'm not truly in there with them. For some reason I linger in there a while long and gaze across, trying to find someone I can meet eyes with. No one, not one is looking at me.

A weight is suddenly on me and it feels as if my chest is about to cave in, I run out of there, out into the empty halls as if I would be able to get more air; I don't.

Where's the rest? There were more?

Told ya it wouldn't take long! What do they mean? What wouldn't take long?

Mariah told me it was common that there'd be affairs between the family and the servants long ago but... Am I just another one to add onto the list?

I shake my head. That's not it.

Then what is it? I don't know.

They know. They know. They know.

"They don't judge you, you know," Mariah is standing in front of me suddenly, looking at me with soft eyes, "I mean they do but only because they don't have the courage to get some themselves, nothing serious."

"Am I in trouble?"

She chuckles, "You're not the first."

"Mariah-"

"Every generation there's a couple scandals here and there, but nothing is done about it so you're fine, Mary."

"Then I'm not his only?" I ask but I'm not actually worried. I trust him... Do I?

I can't even believe him when he says everything will be okay... I deny him whenever he wishes to do something for me... Is it me?

"Out of all the generations my family and I have worked for, he is the first to want to refuse the crown, so I believe that he will be the first to only have one affair," Mariah states with a sense of pride in her voice, looking at me straight in the eye. It's as if she's gained confidence for the new prince she had to care for, and I don't blame here.

"Though," she adds on, "I hear that he's suddenly taken an interest into the rulership."

"What?" I hold my breath.

"He changed his mind, he wishes to be crowned king at his coming of age," She grins, "he must have sudden determination."

It takes me a while to grasp what she had just said. He wants to become king.

"Here take this," she suddenly tosses me a red apple and I'm snapped back into my senses, I catch it, "I don't know if you've heard, but we have no more food."

She begins to walk past me.

"So enjoy it while you can!" And she disappears.

I stare at the apple in my hand, taking in it's shinny dark red skin. King. He suddenly wishes to become king.

Why? I glide my thumb across it, feeling its smoothness.

He strongly didn't want it before... He resented the idea of being tied down to one country... Having so many look to you... Why?

Unless...

I don't bother to get my things. The path to him has become natural to me, the thought of being questioned didn't occur to me until I've made it to his room.

His wood carven door staring straight back at me, my heard begins to pound.

Breathe.

I can't knock, there's no reason for me to be here. I stand, hoping that by some way, he senses me outside his door.

Just tap the door lightly.

I breathe heavily and tap the door strongly three times.

Nothing.

He's not here. I'm tempted to just stand there and wait for him- no - I'm willing too.

I manage to drag myself away, not having any desire to return back to get my belongings I instead do what I do best. I wander.

Wander. No, I was looking.

Looking for him. Looking for Michael. Looking for Harriet. Looking for my father. Looking for home.

I want to go home. I'm tired.

A weight is on me again but I move despite it. No, I will keep looking.

I find myself alone, in the rose garden, supposedly where there's hardly anyone. Maybe that was best.

My chest felt as if it were about to cave in again but this time there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Please-

"Mary?" I knew the voice all to well. I turn to face Michael staring at me in question.

I have no time to stop the tears from flowing, I throw my arms around him and begin to cry.