Have you ever felt claustrophobic?
Not in a literal sense
Actually
Yes
In a literal sense
But
Not like when you're in a cave
Or in a cramped space
I'm stuck
In a boring life
I walk to school
With that one bratty
Shitty
Friend
Who seems to judge me for everything
I don't know what to say to her
What do I say to her?
I only talk openly to people I feel comfortable with
I don't feel comfortable
With her
When I get to school
I have to cope with my one toxic friend
Who I always sit with
I wish I didn't have to.
She rants about herself
Always complaining about her troubles and problems
Never listens to mine.
Everyone else follows her blindly
Do they not see how self absorbed she is?
Is it only me?
Or is it me?
Am I the toxic friend?
I hope not
My life's so boring.
I dream
I wish
For more.
But I fear I will never achieve those dreams
They're impossible.
Nobody cares
Nobody wants
To listen
To me.
So
I'm stuck
In a literal way
My life's choking me
I can't not walk to school with my friends
Who else would I walk with?
I can't not sit with my friend at school
Who else would I sit with?
I can't sit with the others
After all
They follow her blindly.
I can't achieve more.
I just can't.
But maybe my fear is choking me
Maybe my claustrophobia is just my fear
Of being alone.
Of working harder.
They say it's better to be alone than be with bitches.
I don't believe it
But maybe I'm wrong
Maybe I'm scared.
They say you have to good things come to those who work for it.
I don't believe it.
I can't get any higher up
I can't get any better
I can't get more successful.
Maybe I'm just shit.
At writing.
At having a fucking backbone.
Maybe I need to try harder
Maybe I will.
I still feel claustrophobic.
But maybe I see the light at the mouth of the cave.
