Never Let Go

Taking A Turn For The Worst

~Three months later~

I rolled down the sleeve of my shirt in attempt to hide the fresh cuts that were there. Walking out of the bathroom after cleaning up, I checked my phone for a call from the hospital saying he was awake, but found nothing.

Eren's in the hospital, sleeping. Well, at least, that's how I like to put it. He isn't really asleep though, and I know that in my heart of hearts.

No, he isn't dead... he's in a coma.

He's been in a coma for three months now, ever since the accident. In the time between the accident and now, I started showing signs of depression and anxiety, as I was told by a doctor. I have to take medication for both every day just to keep myself in check.

Believe it or not, I eventually started cutting, and my depression / anxiety mix had gotten much worse. The doctors have had to up the dose twice already.

Of course, even with the stronger medication, it's hard. I know that it's my fault Eren is in this position, and all because of my stupidity. If I had kept my eyes on the road, Eren would be here next to me, and I wouldn't be like I am now.

I never told Petra any of this, and I did't even think about telling four-eyes. She'd have a heart attack and probably send a police force to my house to keep tabs on me.

I don't think Mikasa knows any of this either, even though I'm around her every day. We both visit Eren every day, and we agreed to meet at the same time so that we could not only watch him, but talk if we needed the company.

Although, she has given me looks of concern before, many times. I don't know if she's noticing anything, but I really hope she hasn't.

I was about to sit down on the couch until I looked at my phone and saw it was 2:39 PM. I usually am at the hospital at 3, and it takes about fifteen minutes to drive there, so I'd have to get going soon.

I went up to my room and decided to change into a black long-sleeve tee that matched a pair of black skinny jeans. I also ended up wearing a black leather jacket and combat boots.

In case you haven't noticed, I'm starting to take an intense liking to the color black. Well, I liked it before, but I', actually starting to love it.

Almost as much as I love Eren...

I grabbed the keys and walked out of the house, locking the door behind me, and then getting into the car. Putting the keys into the ignition, I relished the rumbling the car made just as it was being started.

I then pulled out of my driveway and made my way to the hospital, not stopping on the way there.

Once I had arrived, I entered, making sure I went to the front desk and stated I was there to see someone.

"Oh, you're here to see Eren Jaeger? You know what room he's in, correct?

"Yes, I do. he's in room 221. Is someone already there to see him?"

"Yes, her name is Mikasa, sister to Eren. I suppose you know her?"

"I do. We met a while back, and when the accident happened."

"Alright. You may go."

I gave her a small nod and a "thanks" as I walked by and made my way to Eren's room on the second floor. I got onto the elevator like I usually did, and when I stepped out, I walked down the hall, not even having to look at the room numbers to find know which one was Eren's.

I knocked on said door, hearing nothing from Mikasa.

'Strange,' I thought. 'Mikasa always says something when I knock. The lady said she was here... did she fall asleep?'

I knocked on the door, a little louder this time. Still no response. When I was about to knock for a third time, the door opened to reveal a nurse.

"I'm sorry sir, I hadn't heard you knock."

"It's alright. Is a girl by the name of Mikasa here?"

She shook her head. "Not right now, she stepped out a few minutes ago to get something from her home."

"Oh." That was all I said before I stepped into the room. I walked over to Eren's side, kneeling by the bedside. Of course, he was 'sleeping'. He hadn't shown signs of waking up for another month or so.

After observing him for 15 minutes or so, Mikasa came back in, but she looked like she was in a hurry. She immediately started talking the moment she came over to me.

"Levi, I'm really sorry, but I had to grab something from home, and now I have to go somewhere, so I really need you to stay here and-"

"Watch Eren? Don't worry, I'm on it."

She nodded and then scurried out, closing the door behind her.

I sat in the chair by Eren's hospital bed and leaned back.

I hadn't noticed I had fallen asleep until I awoke to someone speaking.

"Where... Where am I...?"