MCU Shifting || My Experiences

The start of "Jaiden"

One thing that I absolutely love and adore about my DR is my relationship with James (Bucky). I have nothing but absolute love for that man and it continues to grow every day. Although we currently have a family and are happy, things were not always easy. When Bucky moved into our team space, things were very complicated. Many members of the team didn't trust him. They were afraid of what he could potentially become at any moment. Bucky also didn't seem to trust himself. He felt like he was a danger and as if he needed to isolate himself. But there was just something about his presence that drew me in. I couldn't stand seeing him spend so much time alone. He'd skip out on eating dinner with the team, game nights, movies, anything. No one really interacted with him other than Steve.

As time passed, I couldn't allow myself to just sit around. I would try to interact with him, but he would avoid it or only make a quick gesture and leave. So, I started to wonder. I began thinking about the fact that he had spent most of his life in a cryogenic state. When he wasn't like that, he was fighting wars. Mentally and physically, whether it be at his own will or at the control of others. Then it hit me. He probably hasn't had a proper homecooked meal in forever! That needed to be fixed and I was going to do so. I typically was the one to make dinner for the team -when we weren't eating takeout at least- so I was going to ensure that he had eaten. That night, I made him a plate and even baked a fresh pan of cookies. I wanted to do something special for him to know that he was welcome but I also didn't want to overwhelm or scare him. So, I wrapped his food up and left it at his bedroom door. I continued to do this every day for weeks. Not because I expected anything, but because I just wanted him to feel safe and less alone. This continued for about a month or two, until that special day. The day things changed.

I made dinner for everyone but was sure to make his plate first. Freshly baked chocolate chip and almond butter cookies included. I walked up to the living corridors and stopped right at his door. Same time as every night before. Just as I was about to place the plate at the base of the door, it opened. He stood there, wearing sweatpants and a navy sweatshirt. I remember staring up at him and just saying "hi there" while offering a soft smile. He just looked back at me for a bit before finally saying a simple "hello." I then told him that I had brought him dinner, to which he replied, "So, you're the one who's been doing that." I simply nodded in response. After standing awkwardly for what felt like forever but was probably only 30 seconds, he asked if I wanted to come inside.

Although we sat for a bit in silence, we slowly began having casual conversation. Casual conversation began to turn into us talking about simple things we enjoy. This became a nightly occurance. Every night, I'd bring him dinner, we'd eat together in his room, and talk about random things. Slowly, he began feeling more and more comfortable with me. I got to see him smile occasionally, maybe even laugh a bit. The more time we spent together, the more I got to know about him. In result, the more I began seeing how much he was struggling. In the relatively short time that he stayed in the team space, we had grown quite familiar with each other. He'd tell me stories about things he would remember from being in the 40s, I'd play him songs on the guitar. One of my favorite things that we still do sometimes is making up songs together. 

There's so much that I could say about my love for Bucky. I could genuinely talk about my relationship with him for hours. For now, I'll just say that's how James and I got together. Where everything started. Now, years later, we're married with two kids and two more on the way.