You're Supposed To Be//Billie Eilish

chapter 35

willows pov:

i was full on sobbing. and so were billie, drew, zoe, claudia and i think finneas a little bit too. maggie was crying in patricks arms. 

the credits were playing on the screen while everybody was slowly discovering from the world's a little blurry.

billie hugged me tightly as i wiped away my tears. she cry-laughed with zoe and drew on her other side. 

that movie right there was heartbreaking. 

i tapped billies arm for her to let me go.

"i'll be right back."

i stood up and walked into the bathroom where i got blinded by the bright light. i looked at myself in the mirror. 

my eyes where blotchy and red as well as my nose. 

i never knew billies depression had been so bad. she had told me that she was at a very bad place a few years ago but never could i have imagined how bad. and i mean the movie didn't even show half of the stuff that was actually going on.

i'm happy that she's happier now. happier than ever.

yeah, i listened to her album a few days ago and i'm still recovering. it's so beautiful and i'm so proud of billies and finneas work. 

i splashed some water in my face before drying it with a clean towel. i then left the bathroom again to see that the lights were on again and only billie, drew and zoe were still there. 

"hi, you okay?"

drew asked since she was the first one to notice me coming in. billies and zoes heads turned and i took notice on how a small smile appeared on billies face as she saw me. 

i nodded at drews question and let myself fall onto the couch next to billie. she put her arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to her before kissing my temple.

i giggled and looked in awe up at her.

she's so pretty.

i took her hand in mine and suddenly remembered we weren't the only two people in the room. 

drew and zoe looked at us with stupid grins on their faces.

"what?"

billie asked shaking her head.

"so... what's going on here?"

"i don't know what you mean."

billie put her arm away from me and took her hand out of mine. i felt my heart sting a little bit at her actions but i understood. 

she wasn't ready yet and i accepted that. 

billie stood up and turned to look at us. regret flashing in her eyes before i gave her a soft smile, telling her it was okay.

"i'm gonna look for mom."

"sure."

we all nodded and billie left the room.

"and?"

zoe automatically moved closer.

"what?"

"well, what's going on between you two?"

"nothing, really. we're just friends."

"uhh, sure. that's why you were cuddling up just now and the whole movie."

"she's like that with you guys too."

"uhm... nope, never seen her kiss my temple."

"me neither.

"guys, for real. there's nothing."

they both raised their eyebrows but didn't say anything else. 

thank god.

claudia entered the living room and walked towards us.

"sorry to interrupt you guys but food's ready."

we all jumped to our feet and followed claudia in the backyard. we all sat down and i took a seat next to zoe and across from patrick. 

claudia had made some bomb ass food which was gone in just a few seconds, it felt. we talked until it was dark and i honestly had so much fun. 

this group of people made me feel so welcome. i didn't know them for that long and it still felt like we've all been friends for years. 

i feel so at home and normal that it breaks my heart just thinking about some time when i'll not be able to talk to all of them. 

they all are funny, intelligent, passionate about everything they do and so down to earth. 

i could cry but i just smile widely as i listen to finneas talking about his upcoming projects. 

---

billie stops the car in front of my apartment complex. 

i take her hand from my tight and interlace our fingers. we stare out of the windshield at the only dimly lit street. 

"i wanna tell them about us."

"hm?"

i focus my gaze on her pretty side profile.

"i want to tell my family and friends that i like you, if that's okay with you of course."

"of course it is. but don't feel like you have to. like, you should only really do it if you want to."

"i do. i wanna be able to not hide our relationship in front of them."

"our relationship?"

"i- i mean... uh- what we have going on."

i calmly stroked the back of her hand with my thump.

"you make me feel so crazy, billie."

she blushed and turned away. i giggled and propped my chin on her shoulder. i kissed her cheek before i straightened up, ready to slowly say bye. 

"will?"

"yes?"

"will you be my girlfriend?"

that's a really unnecessary question, cause i mean, we all know the answer...

-----

(800 words)

i don't think i thank you guys enough for reading this book. so... THANK YOU!!! it means so much to me. 

how are you, loves?

<3