𝐌𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐞(discontinued)

𝐕𝐈

                     𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍: 𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐄📍
                             𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄: 𝐎𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝟑𝐑𝐃
                                𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄: 𝟑:𝟑𝟎 𝐏𝐌

𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐑'𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐕:

Soon as I got home I ran up to my room and plopped on the bed. My mind was racing with the events from today. I can't believe I let that nigga snatch me up and kiss me.

I'm confused with myself, why would I let him do that to me? Yet, I'm more confused on the fact that I not only sat there and let him do it, but I kinda liked it. I've never looked at a guy in a romantic or sexual way, but with him, it's obviously different.

But you wanna know what's more embarrassing than him snatching me up like that? It's the fact that I talked a lot of shit and then I let him fucking check me like he said he would. He had me stuttering AND blushing! LIKE HOW YOU MAKE A BLACK MOTHER FUCKA BLUSH?

This overthinking shit ain't gon get me nowhere though. I needed talk to someone about this, so I called the person who knew me the most, Makayla. "A WHATS GOOD A WASSUP CAN A THOT JUST GET A LIL- dang Mir, you don't look to good. You aight?" She asked changing her whole mood. "Kayla, I'm kinda confused about something and I need you to give me yo honest opinion on this, aight?"
"I got you best, what's going on?"

I told her everything, she was surprised at first but now she voicing her opinions a lil too much. "Ouuu, Mirrrrr you inlove, that nigga had you- ". "beep" I cut her off by hanging up on her. Here she go calling me back.

"Ok ok, Mir I'm sorry, I'm done with the jokes for real this time." She said smiling, I just rolled my eyes in response. "Ok but really Mir, you don't have to be gay, but you're definitely not straight. When you were in that situation you let him kiss on you and you admitted to liking it. So maybe you might be bisexual, meaning you like boys and girl." She said telling me straight up

"I mean, I don't know, I've never looked at a boy in a romantic or sexual way before though. Neither have I looked at him in that way before today." I said honestly. "You don't have to be sure of your sexuality now, let things play out and in due time you're going to eventually have your answer on wether you like boys or not. Just know that I'm a phone call away if you need me." She said smiling.

After our lil conversation we caught up with eachother and chatted for a while before we both hung up and went to sleep. I ended up taking Makayla's advice into consideration. I'm just going to see where these new feelings for Jay lead me, and if I like him, then I'll just have to learn to accept that.

...
𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐚𝐲,𝐎𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟕𝐭𝐡

It's been two days since the situation with Jay has happened and I haven't seen him or spoke to him all week. That ain't my nigga or nothing, but how you just gone make me question myself like that and then go ghost on me. Niggas really ain't shit.

I'm currently home In my room watching bad girls club season 16. Dreamdoll just kicked the shit out of  Kailie, and her ass ain't do nothing about it. I can't stand dreamdoll and Winter, but Kailie needs to boss up. "WHOOP HER ASS KAILIE!" I screamed while throwing punches in the air towards the television screen. Every time I watch this show I get in the mood to fight someone outta nowhere.

While throwing punches at the screen I felt a vibration on my leg, making me reach in my pocket to look at my phone. I checked my phone and saw that Jaylen had texted me. Imma wait a while to respond cause I don't wanna seem desperate. Plus he aint text or call me all week , so his ass can wait a bit.