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You woke up. Of course you had to dream about that, while on your period, while also being stressed.
Adrenaline was pumping through your veins. Your body getting pumped to a fight. Almost like the fight, flight or freeze response was kicking in. Exept fight always won.
Fight .....
It has been such a long time since your last fight.
Suddenly you were feeling super depressed. Fighting used to be an outlet for you. A chance to let all your unwanted emotions out. Now you were feeling drained. (Which was probably because of your period honestly)
Not only that, fighting was so much fun.
You had so much potential.
Your trophies and medals were still at the dojo.
It's probably because of that dream isn't it. Or memory if want to be more exact.
You could have gone places. You could have reached the top. You were so close to it anyways. Great now you feel even worse.
You were untouchable, you were invincible. But you were also a kid, so it doesn't really count.
But after what your father did, what he tried to do. The feelings of joy vanished.
'What's the point if I can't even protect myself?'
' Others can protect me instead'
God you were so dumb. Maybe this is a manic episode. Maybe it's the hormonal imbalance of your period, but you felt like you could take over the world at this moment.
But also like you wanna crawl, roll over and die.
You suddenly felt a bit too motivated.
It's time for change. You want to win again.
You want to win until you reach the top.
'what have I been doing all this time?'
You ran away from home, you were homeless for a while, you started dating old men and selling drugs.
And you're not even 18 yet.
Feeling pathetic, you got dressed. Not into a small skirt, you were feeling too aggressive for that at the moment.
The proper response to this should be you, making tea and taking a warm shower, then maybe learning a bit for the history test next week.
Instead you drank a smoothie, took painkillers on an empty stomach and grabbed a lot of cash and ran to the next tattoo shop. Because you're a teenage and you've already have had a lot of bad decisions, so why not add one more to that list?
Before entering, you rang up Mr Xioa. "Hello sir, I was thinking of getting a traditional tattoo. But I just wanted to make sure if there's anything I want to avoid.
